Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: Barbara Brodsky

  • Spring Snow Showers

    April…. So unstable.

    Spring snow showers visit again.

    Mourning doves puff up as they sit on the white-blanketed ground.

    Hunkered down, they seem to know this is not a time to search.

    The sun and warmth will return. Most likely, sooner rather than later.

    Another friend hospitalized with the virus.

    Some continue to wonder why this is such a big deal.

    Like the doves, I am hunkered down. I, too, have stopped searching.

    I follow my breath in daily yoga. My teacher, friend, colleague buried her husband in January. Still the snow falls.

    Song lyrics, “Why do the birds go on singing? Don’t they know it’s the end of the world?”

    But it is not.

    Spring snow showers are evidence it is spring.

    What will I remember most about this time? I will remember the precious moments of connection.

    Pimpled-faced youth, watching my masked face from behind the storm door. Setting the pizza boxes down, taking the dollars I had left in the plastic container that my favorite gum comes in. “Stay safe,” he says, walking back down the porch steps and heading to his car. I hope people are generous to him.

    We have been pizza hungry. Usually our last meal on Pine Island is a good-bye dinner at Ragged Ass with friend Nancy, who stays behind, returning to Michigan sometime around Mother’s Day.

    I carefully wrapped the left-overs in two separate packages and place them in the freezer.

    Likely, we will be hungry for pizza again before this is over.

    I hope I will remember how grateful I feel about so many things. Grateful the dishwasher now both fills and empties. Grateful the washing machine does not leak. Grateful water is no longer dripping from the bottom of the water heater.

    Soon, I hope, I will be grateful the toilet in the guest bath can be flushed without having to turn the water off down at the floor to prevent it from continuing to run.

    Already grateful for the precious commodities that get delivered to my porch. Easter dinner, daffodils, tea ordered from Target, and a sewing machine (with fabric and elastic). I will begin sewing masks.

    I may remember those who survived the virus, and individuals who did not. Both contribute to our well-being. Each is helping this virus find the sweet spot, where parasite and host co-exist.

    Meditation and prayer, yoga, chanting, writing, and ZOOMING — witnessing it all — everything helping us to find the sweet spot, where fear and frustration co-exist with hope and trust.

    Spring snow showers are short-lived….

    Many of you will find the Easter Message with Jeshua (channeled by Barbara Brodsky) uplifting, so I am sharing it with all.

  • Packing, Deep Cleaning, and Blessing

    The one who says nothing good came of this is not yet listening.
    ~ Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estés

    Preparations for our safe travels back to Michigan from our Pine Island Paradise are underway here—packing, deep cleaning, blessing…. this season is like none other. For the first time EVER, we will not visit with our PEEPS in Tennessee. That is emotionally hard.

    Below are excerpts of and hot links to some past blog entries. These come from my heart to your heart to be blended seamlessly with your current needs, spiritual or religious beliefs, and familiar support practices.

    Like panning for gold, make your own everything that is of value to you and simply release the rest. We don’t have time or energy to waste on what does not work.

    Inter-Are

    When we release some of the self-identity and separation, we come to feel our interconnection with everything. The tree dances with the wind not because the wind forces the tree but because the wind and tree literally inter-are. They share the same core of being. The wind is the tree; the tree is the wind. And so they dance together. You can dance with life in the same way. ~ Aaron

    Barbara Brodsky’s summation was simply, “When our practice comes from that place of interconnection, we are attending with skillful support.”

    At the relative level we appear to be separate, but at the ultimate level, there is no separate self. You can understand that no wave is separate from the ocean. The wind and the tree and you and I dance with life. We inter-are….

    Upekka

    People are navigating every one of the eight worldly conditions: loss and gain, good-repute and ill-repute, praise and censure, sorrow and happiness. To practice Upekka is to be unwavering or to stay neutral in the face of each of these.


    Keep Hope Alive

    From my journal 12-14-19:
    Releasing Negative Charge

    Today takes on a charge. Each day does this.

    The idea of lovingkindness being an active “taking in” of the day and allowing the charge to be released is relevant to all now.

    You were dreaming about the environment when you woke up this morning. You saw your friend’s email about the beach in Michigan being eroded. Some would just point fingers and blame. This only amplifies the negative charge.

    As you bring loving awareness to the situation — not denial, not ignorance, not sticking your head in the sand — you are allowing the transmutation, which is natural, to work for the benefit of all.

    You can mine support in everything. Here is an entry from Barbara Brodsky’s Daily Recollection, which can be used with or without a 108-bead mala.

    I remember the ten perfections and will practice them well:
    43rd bead: Generosity
    44th bead: Morality
    45th bead: Energy
    46th bead: Wisdom
    47th bead: Renunciation
    48th bead: Lovingkindness
    49th bead: Truthfulness
    50th bead: Resolution (clarity)
    51st bead: Equanimity
    52nd bead: Patience

    Here is the link to the Chant Book:FREE CHANT BOOK

    The next time we are face-to-face will be the deepest of joys never again to be taken for granted….

  • What Endures?

    Sunday, March 29, 2020 was the second (and last) day of the Deep Spring Meditation Center virtual retreat with Barbara Brodsky, Aaron, and John Orr. In the afternoon, I went to Galt Nature Preserve for my walking meditation.

    This is the latest/driest I have been here in Southwest Florida. The flora I am familiar with and love, including Sweet Acacia, has almost died back entirely. New (unfamiliar) flora is coming forth.

    I took a short video of the wind singing through the dry palms sounding just like a far-away water fall.

    As I arrived back at my car, hawk flew directly overhead swooping low!

    Juvenile eagle soared with its wide, young wings, just above the horizon, about 300 yards away. This eaglet was born here in the preserve earlier this season, in the nest a short distance from the drive. December seems so very long ago now.

    Yellow police tape surrounds the pavilion as though the deserted picnic tables had recently been the scene of a crime.

    The sun was hot on my skin.

    The thermometer on the instrument panel indicated 87 degrees. All season I had stayed in the house during the heat of the day, protecting myself from the discomfort.

    The past two afternoons while ‘on retreat’ I had walked in the heat.

    Tenderly, I witnessed a pattern in my past of wanting to avoid being uncomfortable. My throat tightened around the thought that perhaps we miss too much….

    I turned the air conditioning off before starting the engine in the stifling hot car which has black interior and was parked in the hot tropical sun.

    I pushed the button to lower the windows and was amazed how refreshing the air felt.

    In his closing comments, John Orr spoke of aging and of the current conditions in our world. He said so much is falling away, but even though there is suffering, we can reflect with gratitude on what has been wonderful and beautiful. We can ask, “What endures?”

    May this humble human remember….

  • 6 Daily Quarantine Questions

    Life is totally interrupted by this COVID-19 mandated safe sheltering/social distancing/self-quarantine. I chose to “attend” a two-day meditation retreat with about 80 others virtually. This virtual Deep Spring Meditation Center retreat with Barbara Brodsky, Aaron, and John Orr is a first…. but, just about everything in the current conditions is UNPRECEDENTED.

    During the Q&A portion, another retreatant shared six daily quarantine questions, suggested by James Baraz, founding teacher of Spirit Rock Meditation Center, co-author with Shoshana Alexander of “Awakening Joy: Ten Steps to Happiness.” Baraz teaches a five-month, internationally-recognized “Awakening Joy” course. Here are roughly those six daily question:

    1. What am I grateful for?
    2. With whom am I checking in/and connecting today?
    3. What expectations of “normal” am I letting go of today?
    4. How am I getting outside today?
    5. How am I using my body today?
    6. What beauty am I creating/inviting/cultivating today?

    Yesterday afternoon we had a period of optional walking meditation or rest. I drove to a nearby nature trail.



    When I approached the bridge, a lone juvenile white ibis was on the rail. I stood still, just watching. I usually see them in quite large gatherings, so plentiful here people call them Pine Island chickens. As I was the intruder, I was willing to wait—even if I had to wait for my entire walking period.

    Eventually the ibis dropped down to a small creek and I stepped softly onto the bridge. Moving slowly, stopping at the very place the ibis had been sitting on the rail, I stood silently watching below. The bird began to feed.



    The ibis is a general term for long legged bird. Ibis “totem” meaning: If this bird is given to one as an animal totem then it denotes a graceful and well-balanced individual. Their beauty is feminine in quality.

    I tiptoed onto the trail. We had recently been given an exercise: choose an area in your house and walk backwards. Notice the tension. Catch the sensations and thoughts when things are not “normal” and feel out of control.

    I decided to walk backwards on the trail. I had to be VERY mindful because the clearing of the trail left lots of cross-cut roots.



    I covered quite a bit of distance before it was time to head back for the 4:30 session. I continued walking backwards to my car. At first I noticed more tension going that direction. I obviously preferred moving forward, even when I was walking backwards. Noting the tension, I chose to enjoy seeing where I had been, while trusting I was going where I wanted to go.

    Back at the bridge, I saw this bright yellow painted rock with the words “Do more with less.” The lone juvenile ibis was still contentedly feeding down below.



    Our evening dharma talk ended with Aaron asking us a powerful question. “What is the world YOU wish to see in five, or ten, or 20 years?”

    He continued, “Do you want to create a world in which all beings live in peace? YOU are the expression of the divine. YOU have immense power to create…. Join together hand-to-hand and create that which you wish to create. Watch the arising of fear, anger, greed. Remember how to relate to these. Relate with an open heart. May all beings come to the end of suffering….”

  • Roller Coaster of Emotions

    “Whatever happens to me is not nearly so important as the way I look at the happening — the way I feel about it.”

    Columbus, Ohio, August 1982, “Little Surrenders,”, Step By Step

    My former Yellow Brick Road post ended on a high note, but the circumstances around COVID-19 are stimulating a roller coaster of emotions for most of us.

    The evening after I baked and delivered cookies, John and I saw Louie, one of the guys from shuffleboard. Louie said, “You think about it like ‘I have the virus’ and you’ll do the right thing.”

    Having seen the stability chart of this virus, I was awake in the middle of the night, writing in my journal, “If I knew I had the virus would I have baked the cookies and delivered them to people I love?”

    Later that morning, I shared my concern and remorse with Nancy, a recipient of oatmeal raisin cookies, who brought me to tears with her response, “If I were to die from an infected cookie, I would die with gratitude for the savoring of it.”

    If I were ever to get a tatoo, mine would be: UNPRECIDENTED.

    Every action has myriad thought, word, and deed.

    The better consciousness in me lifts me into a world where there is no longer personality and causality or subject or object.

    ~ Arthur Schopenhauer (1788—1860), known as the first German philosopher to incorporate Eastern thought into his writings

    I notice how many individual lives seem to have been lined up with our collective (global) experience. My belief is that has been/is true for EVERY individual life, but some examples are totally obvious.

    One friend moved to another state for family support as they hoped to have a baby. They gave birth to Athena in February, and are now safe sheltering alone. Amazingly, this couple mindfully allowed their daughter to choose her own name. Athena means: One who is wise. Athena is the goddess of war and wisdom. The name is associated with the “lucky number” of four. 2020 equals four in simple numerology….

    Late last fall, one couple got their finances in order by closing out high-interest credit cards and consolidating to a family run bank with reasonable interest, and no risk of foreclosure.

    The husband of a dear friend passed in late January. He had been receiving hospice care at home, and it would have been so much more stressful for her to still be trying to care for him. Thankfully, she had some time to adjust to living alone before the order to stay in place came down.

    Our daughter, Stacey, and her husband, Doug, would have had a very drastic life-style change if they had not been living on their sailboat since October. We saw them on Facetime briefly yesterday and they are content, and appreciating the sun shade Doug just put up over their deck.



    My anxiety level is increased because (as of the moment of this writing) we do not yet know if our house is Michigan is ready for us to return, or if the team that has been doing the mold remediation will be allowed to finish. This fear around “home” is a childhood pattern for me and I am doing my best to comfort the frightened feelings and remind myself I am safe. We will get through this.

    It takes a lot to navigate these situations, but we do know they are impermanent.

    From this morning’s journal: You have so little to do now. I would want you to be easy with yourselves, and truly be easily delighted, Soften up…. Be sure you are calling on the light in your heart. That is truly your HOME.

    And these words from Aaron, “Each of you, as you find compassion for your own fear and negativity, will intuitively understand how to bring that compassion out in the world so as to say no to those who hoard, those who manipulate, those who turn their backs on others’ suffering. You say no with love. Acting from fear has nothing to do with how much wealth or power you have, it has to do with the level of consciousness.”

    P.S. Here is the face of Barbara Brodsky, my beloved teacher and friend, from last night’s ZOOM class. She is such a role model!

  • We Are What We Think

    It is surreal that I posted my previous blog just yesterday. I did say this self-selected social isolation may not last forever, it may just feel that way.

    Actually, I don’t really mind the solitude. Last evening Barbara Brodsky asked our Dharma Path group to notice how very little is different about this from retreat, which we all love.

    Well, one difference is that on retreat we have no news.

    The Awakened Heart group was asked to ponder these points:

    1. Please reflect on some ways you are able to ground yourselves in Love even with the fears and other emotions brought forth by Covid-19.

    2. How can we each become a true power of Love in our present world, offering the expressions of Love to help release suffering?

    3. “We are what we think; with our thoughts we make the world.” (Dhammapada)

    4. What if the whole world were to shift from negative, fear-based thoughts about this virus, into a strong, clear compassion?

    5. How does our practice help?

    6. How to we practice with fear and anxiety?

    Aaron says a high vibration makes your energy field like Teflon, so the virus is unable to stick.

    People Quarantined in Italy Join Together In Song From Balconies During Coronavirus Lockdown.


    In California they are calling it “safe sheltering.” One friend said they scheduled a noon concert on their street. They arranged a playlist and everyone came out on their porches and played their instruments.

    I am going to suggest virtual playing of “Farkle/10,000” with friends Linda and Larry. We can each have our set of five dice and we can be on FaceTime or Zoom for the game. Like safe sex, it is a game where everyone wins….

    We are what we think. With out minds we make the world.

    Let’s get creative to see how many ways you can find to keep joy and fun and lightheartedness alive to balance the inconvenience and fear.

  • What Am I Willing To Do?

    After reading a rather long article related to the spread of COVID-19 I am pondering what I am willing to do for the good of all: Don’t Test, Don’t Tell — 10 Days Later.

    Jim Koopman is an epidemiologist. Jim and his wife, Helen, host the meditation group that meets on Pine Island with Sheilana Massey. I sent the article to Jim this morning asking him the question, “Would this be over by everyone in the world totally isolating for 14 days?”

    Here is Jim’s response and a link about him.

    If you had absolutely perfect social distancing, where no one went out and touched things contaminated by cases, a couple weeks would work. We don’t know how effective our social distancing is. But we are hoping to cut transmission in half. If we could do that, the basic reproduction number would be about that of a typical seasonal flu epidemic with an established strain. But no one is expecting we will do that well. This experience, however, is going to tell us a lot about how infections spread in different parts of our population if we can only get really good testing soon and conduct extensive serological surveys with extensive behavioral and social data.

    Jim Koopman MD MPH Developing Theory that Serves the Public Health

    This morning I asked John to read the article before going to shuffleboard as he had planned. I reminded him I can only be as safe as he is willing to be. No one is an island. We are all in this together.

    Without fear, guided by entirely by compassion and wisdom, we can ask ourselves simply, “What am I willing to do for the good of all?”

    Kathy Zerler and I have committed to sharing a daily yoga practice via phone. Many organizations offering meditation, worship, and/or fitness classes, are opening up Zoom or Facebook Live gatherings. We are capable of staying connected, even while we are guided to practice “perfect social distancing” for the good of all.

    Today, my meditation teacher, Barbara Brodsky, is bringing her husband home. Hal had a severe stroke two years ago and has been in a nursing home. Facilities are restricting those coming in and out to limit risk to an already vulnerable population. Barbara knows without access to his care team, Hal would be sentenced to bed, without therapy of any kind. As many of you know, Barbara is deaf and since the stroke Hal has been unable to use sign language.

    Barbara’s message this morning about bringing Hal home: “Challenging, scary and wonderful!”

    Yes, these times are challenging, scary and WONDERful….

  • Human Feet

    My mind is so busy. I pull myself away from the Tapping Summit to join my Friday morning writing group, and the group seems so focused on the mundane I want to leave. I want to be inside where it is safe.

    Finally, Mary reads an incredible poem: “For Calling the Spirit Back from Wandering the Earth in its Human Feet” by Joy Harjo

    I hope you will read this poem. You will relate. We all have human feet.

    I begin to write:

    Loss and Gain

    Searching for safety and security we wander aimlessly through the lostness of our own minds, opening door-after-door only to look into a mirror. Caught in the haze of a maze, thinking the same thoughts year after year without so much as questioning where they are leading us.

    A few tell-tale feathers lay on the ground outside the window

    A ghost-like image where they wiped the dust upon impact

    Beak, wing, and silence now where the THUD had been

    Heart breaking loneliness hits my mind the same way the bird hit the window: suddenly and without malice of forethought. An old friend, this feeling of not being wanted, loved, or safe. I open another door. Perhaps this time something else will be there.

    Eyes grow dull

    Search for a stress-free environment begins

    Danger results from well-meaning help

    Snakes shed their skin to allow for further growth. The process is natural and happens throughout their lives, but it is not an easy process. Being human is not an easy process either, and I, too, search for a stress-free environment in which to shed.

    Nigger

    Negro

    African America

    Black

    Words reveal our progress

    Slogans from mindfulness t-shirts I have seen come to mind: Meditation is not what you think, You Have the Right to Remain Silent, Don’t Believe Everything You Think.

    Perhaps hopeful, trusting, and calm will be the result of my new skin.

    P.S. The Deep Spring Dharma Path Study Group with Barbara Brodsky is finishing our two-year commitment. We are finding the light within Sacred Darkness. Whatever the conditions in your life right now, you in your human feet are never alone.

  • Wild Places Need LOVE

    The lessons of the mold continue….

    We did not know where, but the air quality test taken in our home indicated more mold was present. This week we know where the mold was hiding. The condensate line from our HVAC was dumping water into the belly of our mobile home, saturating the insulation, creating a perfect growing condition.

    Here are photos of what used to be our laundry room floor and the wall behind the utility cupboard:

    I have felt a lot of resistance to this news. I have felt that resistance as a knot in my stomach, tightness in my chest, and a lump in my throat.

    Others are going through challenges related to diagnosis, prognosis, pain, and fear of death. Our planet itself is going through challenges.

    On a guided walk this morning we heard a naturalist speak of the threads of connection between everything. He spoke of the water and the fire and the species overlapping: WE are interdependent.

    From the Conservation Foundation website:

    Wild Places Need You

    Why?

    Because they are fast disappearing. And with them goes safe habitat for wildlife, rural ranchlands, the protection of clean water, and beautiful places to hike, swim, and fish. With support from people like you, Conservation Foundation of the Gulf Coast has permanently protected more than 12,000 acres of critical lands. But time is running out.

    You are the last generation that can save this land. Together, we will ensure that the human and natural worlds of Southwest Florida flourish together.

    Whether it is mold remediation, a diagnosis and healing sought, or environmental balance we are speaking about, the answer is universal: LOVE.

    Reports of Aborigines healing broken bones, muscle tears, and illnesses of every kind using their didgereedoo point us in a direction. Harmony and healing is possible.

    Transcript from “LOVE” channeled by Barbara Brodsky, my meditation teacher:

    Q: Are you suggesting that many of us here are able or will be able in this life to invite broken bones, divided cells to merge…

    Love: You all are perfectly capable of that.

    Q: In this life now?

    Love: Of course! Now! Your limiting beliefs stop you from doing it.

    We know the truth of this. At the center of our being truth resonates.

    Q: So, in my daily life, how can I practice this?

    Love: Choose a space, a place that you pass by often in the day, like a doorway or a specific tree, and hold the intention every time you pass that space to pause, take a deep breath, and say, “I am love, and I welcome love. I choose to invite love.” It may only take a few seconds. “I am love. I am open to love. Thank you.” Allow yourself to feel it and then walk on. But if you do this 20 times a day, eventually it’s going to take root. Okay?

  • Keep Hope Alive

    Yesterday at meditation we had some lively conversation. On the drive home, a Katey and I mentioned something we had both previously learned from Brugh Joy: Release the need to understand.

    That idea is shared in his book, Joy’s Way: A Map for the Transformational Journey. An Introduction to the Potentials for Healing with Body Energies. In the third chapter of the book, Brugh describes a cosmic experience of a woman who came to talk with him about her challenges in life. A few months earlier, she had been walking along a beach, saw an iridescent light, and heard a booming voice deliver three injunctions. She thought she was going mad. The voice said, slowly and repetitively, “‘There are three injunctions for you. Pay attention to them. Make no comparisons; make no comparisons. Make no judgments; make no judgments. Delete your need to understand; delete your need to understand.’” (p. 59)

    Our daughter, Stacey, and her husband, Doug, have the Lady Gail at a marina in the high rent district in Key West. She is asking for divine guidance about their next steps on this adventure. I reminded her they are right where they need to be—today and at least through January 3 when granddaughter, Courtney, flies back to Tennessee after spending Christmas and New Years with them.

    This morning I received an article from Joel about the mental health benefits of tarot and astrology. Reading the article sent me on a walk down memory lane!

    Years ago I was giving a talk on alternative medicine to a packed room at our local hospital. I had a 3-page handout with brief descriptions of each of the modalities offered by the members of our Holistic Alliance. The list was alphabetized, so it began with acupressure and acupuncture. Third on the list was astrology.

    I was given a glowing introduction by Brenda Layne, a celebrity and friend from the radio station, a woman in the audience raised her hand. Thinking she may be saying that she couldn’t hear her that the lighting was bad or something, I acknowledged the woman.

    Voice dripping with sarcasm she said, “How could you imply that astrology could be a valid medical treatment?”

    You could have heard a pin drop in the room.

    After taking a deep breath, I replied, “From the tone of your question, obviously it wouldn’t be a viable option for you.”

    Then I continued….

    “However, if someone going through something major like cancer believed in astrology (even a small belief) and that person had an astrological reading that provided information like this, ‘I can see here that you have just come through your Saturn return and it’s likely been a very difficult past six months, but hold on, because Venus is rising and before the first of the year everything will turn around for you,’ that is a valid medical intervention because it restores hope.”

    It is vital to notice what restores hope for you in times of stress or distress.

    Eight of Cups was the featured card in the article about the mental health benefits of tarot and astrology, so I sent the information along to Stacey:


    Eight of Cups

    People who get what they truly want in life know how to walk away when something is good, but not good enough. Mind the parts of you that feel flattered, lucky and scared you can’t do better. It’s okay to have those feelings, but do not let them dictate your decisions.

    Barbara Brodsky tells of an experience she had years ago. She was hospitalized with a very serious cellulitis in her leg. Nothing was working and the infection had moved up above her knee and was spreading to her thigh. The doctors started her on another antibiotic saying, “We will give this 36 hours. If it does not stop the spread, the leg will have to be amputated to keep the infection from getting into organs.”

    The next morning there was no improvement.

    Barbara was in excruciating pain and despair—so afraid, so angry. “Why me?”

    Late that night Barbara got a roommate. Through a narrow opening in the curtain that separated the two beds, she saw that the woman had obviously had a leg amputated. The woman’s other leg was just a stump from a previous amputation.

    Compassion rose up in Barbara. Others came to mind who had lost a leg due to war or an accident or an illness.

    Suddenly Barbara’s heart was open. This was no longer about her fear and pain and suffering. It was about ALL pain and suffering. After doing Metta (lovingkindess meditation) for a few hours, somewhere before dawn, Barbara fell asleep. When she was awoken a couple of hours later, her fever had broken. The antibiotic was working!

    Barbara was not pretending to have compassion. Genuine compassion was there for the woman, for others, for Barbara.

    From my journal 12-14-19:
    Releasing Negative Charge

    Today takes on a charge. Each day does this.

    The idea of lovingkindness being an active “taking in” of the day and allowing the charge to be released is relevant to all now.

    You were dreaming about the environment when you woke up this morning. You saw your friend’s email about the beach in Michigan being eroded. Some would just point fingers and blame. This only amplifies the negative charge.

    As you bring loving awareness to the situation — not denial, not ignorance, not sticking your head in the sand — you are allowing the transmutation, which is natural, to work for the benefit of all.

    Thoughts today of Jessica in Texas going through an experimental chemotherapy.

    Thoughts of Jane Foster and all she has gone through.

    I don’t know what their astrology chart might show, but the message of the Eight of Cups is relevant to both of them today, and to all of us.

    And not just at Christmas, but every day of the year.

    Keep Hope Alive