Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: spirituality

  • No Ordinary Face

    Listening to the wind blowing, thoughts come to mind of how relative our perspective is. A prime example of that is weather.

    Bundled up out for a walk, Floridians see Michiganders riding bikes in shirt sleeves.

    Americans look into a brimming pantry complaining about nothing to eat.

    “No Ordinary Face” was first shared at an open mic. I have since been encouraged to share the story more widely. It certainly is a powerful demonstration of perspective.

    No Ordinary Face

    It has been over twenty years since I met her, but hers is a face I will never forget.

    I work as a wellness consultant, sometimes called a holistic healer. She had been referred to me by one of my colleagues, for a surgical support session. Physical healing happens more easily when you are emotionally and mentally prepared. Combining hypnosis and energy medicine I help people “imagine healing.” I knew she was facing an extensive reconstruction following serious burns, but nothing I had been told about her prepared me for what I was seeing.

    “So, you are scheduled for plastic surgery?” I asked. As she answered I jotted the date and time and hospital onto her chart without looking away from her face.

    With a poise not anticipated from her shocking physical appearance, she provided a brief highlight of her MANY previous surgeries.

    As she answered my unspoken question, without permission my chest with it’s now rapid-beating heart leaned forward ever so slightly, “I set myself on fire. I did not want to live,” she was not apologizing but merely helping me understand. “More than my not wanting to live, I thought no one would care if I died. I was wrong, nearly dead wrong.”

    “As the flames caught,” she continued, “I heard a voice yell ‘OPEN THE DOOR AND GET OUT OF THE CAR…. NOW!’”

    She went on to tell me that her life had been totally changed by that event. I thought to myself that was an understatement. There was no person who yelled. She recognized the voice as god, an angel, or some divine guide.

    As though proof of these changes and her true value, she reached in her purse and produced a photograph of a red-haired, blue-eyed toddler sitting on the most realistic rocking horse I have ever seen. “I have a daughter now… My daughter knows she is loved,” her voice trailed off wistfully as she placed the photo back in her purse.

    “There are other people who feel like no one cares but it is not true. I would not be here today had it not been for that voice… Someone cares. Call it what you want. I am living proof someone cares about each of us.”

    “I don’t really remember what I looked like before,” she added with twisted grin, “but I love this face.”

    When she had doused the car with gasoline, climbed in behind the steering wheel, and struck the match, her previous face had melted away like a candle burning in the August wind.

    This face. A face made from other body parts: abdomen ears, underarm eyes, back-of knee nose, and labia lips: this definitely was no ordinary face.

  • Tickets for “Wrong” Date

    Sacred Stories

    When their tickets for the upcoming cruise arrived, the tickets were dated two weeks earlier than arranged. She was about to phone the company to have them changed when her husband calmly said, “Leave them. Perhaps there is a reason this is a better date.”

    The Italian cruise ship Costa Concordia capsized and sank after striking an underwater rock off Isola del Giglio, Tuscany, on 13 January 2012, resulting in 32 deaths.

    They would have been on it….

    These are sacred stories. Pay attention to happenings in your life. Do you have a story to share? Send email to debra@scs-matters.com.

  • Chaplain Saved!

    Sacred Stories

    He was serving in Vietnam as a Chaplain. Each week he would travel from the base to villages where they had men serving. He would do a service and offer sacraments.

    On a Monday morning as he was walking out of his hooch he heard a voice say, “Go today instead of tomorrow,” referring to his traveling to one of the outlying areas that he normally traveled to on Tuesday. At first he thought someone was fooling with him and then he heard the voice again, coming inside his head, “Go today, don’t go tomorrow.”

    Reporting a few minutes later he was told that a group was going to that village today if he wanted to go.

    He responded, “Yes!”

    The following day the tank that he would have been in going to the village hit a plastic explosive. He likely would have died when a large shrapnel went right up through the seat of the tank he would have been occupying…

    These are sacred stories. Pay attention to happenings in your life. Do you have a story to share? Send email to debra@scs-matters.com.

  • Winter Wonderland

    As a writer, generating material is as easy as paying attention to the burr beneath your saddle. On January 5 of this year wishing our granddaughter happy birthday pulled me back 19 years to the day she was born. The words “winter wonderland” — one of the nicknames for Michigan, my home state, were not the first on my lips.

    Drifts were piled outside that rivaled the summit of Mt. Everest. Visibility was reduced to the nose in front of my face. Temperatures had plummeted so low the gas line in our car was frozen solid even while it was parked in the garage.

    We were not getting to Tennessee for our granddaughter’s birth.

    January 5 that year I cried all day.

    There are times in our lives when our human efforts are just not enough to bring about what we want. I could not clear the roads, and I could not stop my granddaughter’s timed entry into this world.

    For several years our family has drawn names and made hand-crafted gifts. This past Christmas, I got my granddaughter’s name. I designed a deck of cards, and a companion book of inspired writings to correspond with each card, based loosely on the symbolism in a Tarot deck.

    Yesterday I received a gifted copy of The Crafty Poet: A Portable Workshop, by Diane Lockward. Our poetry group has begun working through this wonderful book. As I opened to the first chapter, our assignment, I read:

    Those who have caused us early pain and loneliness, the sources of our art: should we detest them or kiss their feet? ~ Wesley McNair

    A tear formed in the corner of my eye as I read my granddaughter’s words in response to my happy birthday message. “I’m so thankful that you’re my Gammie…”

    To which I replied, “And I’m so thankful that you’re my granddaughter. Sometime today or tomorrow draw a card from ‘Courtney’s Cards’ and see what the message is for your birthday. You can share that with me!”

    “I’d love to.”

    She picked the King of Spades.
    “The Christian does not think God will love us because we are good; but that God will make us good because he loves us.” ~ C.S. Lewis

    Amen.

    I am symbolically kissing the feet of the snow that has piled around my home this week this year freezing the water line into the house. Even the most bitter of our days will thaw out and the difficult will be made easy. Spring always follows winter…

  • Fireworks!

    As my fingers find their way on the keyboard, fireworks are booming around me. That is how some people celebrate New Years. My thoughts go to the Veterans with PTSD and dogs who feel panic when experiencing loud noises.

    New Years is such a significant opportunity for ritual. It is one of my favorite days of the year. This year, it is also a full moon.

    The full moon is a time to release thoughts, beliefs, habits, memories, attitudes. Let go of everything that no longer serves you, bless and release what you no longer need in your life. Honor and transform any aspect of yourself that you have outgrown. The energy of the full moon joins powerfully with the beginning of 2018.

    Barbara Brodsky has been my meditation teacher for many years now. Each day she shares a “Thought for Today.” I love the words from December 31, 2017:

    Deep Spring Center Thought for Today
    To manifest in the world begins with intention and conscious thought. What do you wish for yourself? ‘May I abide in well-being and freedom from affliction, freedom from anxiety, freedom from hostility and ill-will, and may I maintain well-being in myself. May my heart open and flower. May I love and be loved. May I find the healing that I seek. May I find the ways to live in harmony with others and them with me. May I be free from suffering. May I be happy and find peace.’ Now offer those same intentions for the world.

    As I wait for the noise outside to stop, I welcome the inner silence which is always there.

    Do you receive the Sacred Story each Saturday? If not, go to DebraBasham.com to subscribe to receive posts by email. This one fits so well with our New Years intention:

    Things Will Get Better
    by Debra Basham

    Sacred Stories

    These were very dark times as she was recovering from alcoholism. It was not that she wanted to drink—but neither did she want to live.

    She had rolled up towels to put around the doors and windows and intended to turn on the gas and end her pain.

    She heard a knock at the door.

    “Who is it?” she asked.

    A woman answered. “It is Pat. I have an appointment with you.”

    Not wanting to draw attention from the neighbor, she opened the door a crack. Pat marched in, went right to the kitchen and sat at the table, looking over at the towels. “See, your name is right here on my calendar.”

    Pat went on to say her husband was an alcoholic and she knew about depression. “Things will get better,” she said.
    Then she left….

    (Note – This story was shared in a public AA talk and while I do not have written permission to share it here, I think you will agree that the teller of the story would want others to know things will get better.)

    Make this next year your best. Gift the world with your authentic being. You are a peaceful soul….

  • Things Will Get Better

    Sacred Stories

    These were very dark times as she was recovering from alcoholism. It was not that she wanted to drink—but neither did she want to live.

    She had rolled up towels to put around the doors and windows and intended to turn on the gas and end her pain.

    She heard a knock at the door. “Who is it?” she asked.

    A woman answered. “It is Pat. I have an appointment with you.”

    Not wanting to draw attention from the neighbor, she opened the door a crack. Pat marched in, went right to the kitchen and sat at the table, looking over at the towels. “See, your name is right here on my calendar.”

    Pat went on to say her husband was an alcoholic and she knew about depression. “Things will get better,” she said.

    Then she left….

    These are sacred stories. Pay attention to happenings in your life. Do you have a story to share? Send email to debra@scs-matters.com. (Note – This story was shared in a public AA talk and while I do not have written permission to share it here, I think you will agree that the teller of the story would want others to know things will get better.)

  • Husband’s Clothes

    Sacred Stories

    As she stood in line at the grocery store the man in front of her looked so much like her late husband it almost took her breath away. The same height, the same built, even a similar style of movement.

    Without thinking she spoke, “My husband passed recently and you are of such a similar build I am wondering if you are open to receiving his clothing. Some people are funny about that. I have been wondering what to do with them. He even has jeans he’s never worn… ”

    “Well, that is very kind,” he smiled softly.

    They also discovered he wore the same size shoes as her husband, so those went with him, too. As he was leaving with his treasures he thanked her and confessed, “I have a new job that I have to wear ‘good’ jeans for. I only had this one pair, and I have been washing them every night and wearing them again the next day.”

    She suddenly realized she had obviously truly been guided.

    These are sacred stories. Pay attention to happenings in your life. Do you have a story to share? Send email to debra@scs-matters.com.

  • Preparations

    I love order. Maybe I am not totally excessive compulsive about it, but I when I have been called a “neat freak” I have taken that as a compliment.

    This week, as many others are busy with holiday preparations, I am preparing our tiny house for a big construction project that will begin right after Christmas. As some areas are being emptied out, other areas are being jam-packed.


    One of the things I notice is that even my chaos must have order to it.

    I took a break from my preparations yesterday and enjoyed listening to the December 17 talk given by Reverend Linda Beushausen at St. John UCC in New Buffalo. The talk was on Joy, specifically that joy is not an emotion but rather a choice we make. She told about a person who admits to having a challenge letting go of the stuff she has held on to that has kept her a victim and let joy in. Gay Hendricks calls this the challenge of expanding our upper limits. He says those profound shifts in your internal set points do not generally happen overnight, but Linda gave us a hint how we can access more joy.

    She said gratitude is how we get to joy. When I put that phrase (gratitude is how we get to joy) into the search bar, it yielded about 6,950,000 results! A few of those include:

      Daily Habits of Gratitude That Will Attract Joy into Your Life with Jack Canfield

      12 Powerful Gratitude Practices That Bring Joy by Joel Almeida

      5 Tips to Supercharge Your Gratitude List and Infuse Your Life With Joy by Tree Franklyn

    Today, my business partner lost his wallet. He had been running errands and when he stopped to get gas, his wallet was gone. He back-tracked to the previous stops, but his wallet was not yet found when he sent a message telling me it was missing. A few minutes later, he sent word that his wallet had been returned with everything still in it. His message ended with this: “Certainly guardian angels seem to have come to the rescue, and I’m grateful….”

    That reminded me of “Package” published July 18, 2015, in Sacred Stories. If you are not signed up to receive the Sacred Stories each week, you can sign up to do that. Sharing them gives me joy!

    As you continue with what ever preparations you are involved in right now, may you find that your gratitude is a bridge so you can find then find joy in the journey.

  • Honesty is the Best Policy

    Sacred Stories

    “You will want to know that I am out on parole. I got into trouble with drugs and have a felony,” he laid it out there.

    “My son is in prison right now related to drugs, and my daughter is addicted to opioids. I will do everything I can to go to bat for you,” came the reply.

    He realized how important it was to be honest, even if that was not easy. He was glad he could be there for this father. To demonstrate the good that can come from difficulties.

    While he did not end up getting that job, he knew his sharing was significant to both of them.

    These are sacred stories. Pay attention to happenings in your life. Do you have a story to share? Send email to debra@scs-matters.com.

  • Love One Another, No Matter What


    It is a wintry day again. For the time being, I have abandoned the riding of my Airdyne in the chilly barn for walking on a treadmill in the warmth of the community room.

    My least favorite part of the winter weather is how I brace against it. The whole body tenses up, and the seconds to walk in from the car are endured, rather than enjoyed.

    I have never understood that, as I am a January baby I should love winter weather, right?

    This morning I read this marvelous quotation from Each Day a New Beginning, by Karen Casey: “We can serve one another best, never by commiserating with sadnesses, but by celebrating life’s challenges. They offer the opportunities necessary to our continued growth.”

    One friend said goodbye to her pet bunny rabbit (of 14 years). Friends are supporting their daughter through a recent diagnosis of stage 3 colon cancer. Many have lost loved ones this year. Our own family is celebrating the holidays one brother short. Life has its challenges.

    Here is a certain truth for meeting all of life’s challenges from Neale Donald Walsch: Nothing changes the environment like one person deciding to love another, no matter what.