Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: DebraBasham.com

  • Song for Someone

    Sacred Stories

    Feeling a sense of self-judgment and doubt, she asked for guidance related to whether a spiritual group she was practicing with was right for her.

    In Buddhism, the antidote to doubt is faith, an active willingness to suspend self-judgment and to see for yourself what is true.

    “A Song for Someone” by U2 came on and the line in the lyrics she heard was:

    There is a light you can’t always see!

    She realized this was the answer!

    If there is a light
    You can’t always see
    And there is a world
    We can’t always be
    If there is a dark
    Now we shouldn’t doubt
    And there is a light
    Don’t let it go out

    She could see the mind state of doubt for what it is. And she was willing to see for herself what is true.

    And this is a song
    A song for someone
    This is a song
    A song for someone

  • Let’s Change Your Medication

    Sacred Stories

    He was navigating a medical condition with as much grace as possible when one more sleepless night due to pain motivated him to determine, “I am going to tell the doctor that we need to do something else.”

    The following morning the doctor called him, saying, “Let’s change your medication.”

    That was such a confirmation!

    Dean Ornish, M.D. was quoted as having said, “There is no “I” in wellness.”

    It is so important (especially during difficult conditions) to realize we are ever-connected.

  • True Freedom

    “When the water is muddy
    and you can’t see the bottom,
    no amount of stirring
    can clear the water.”
    ~ Debra Basham

    In the U.S. the 4th of July represents freedom. People often think of freedom as freedom FROM something outside of us, but true freedom is an inside job, and nothing outside of you needs to change for you to enjoy it.

    Wednesday night I was unable to fall asleep after John came to bed, so I got up and came in on the bed in the office. At 2:00 am, I was still awake, but I fell asleep some time after that.

    At my normal waking time (about 6:00 am) I was enjoying a very stable (lucid) dream state, and I knew I had a choice (or not) to feel (or not) tired. It really isn’t sleep that restores one—we are restored by alignment. What is alignment? Activation of your parasympathetic nervous system….

    I have previously posted several tips on activation, but maybe it is worth another quick reminder: (See PNS is BIG; A Chilling Way to Calm Down; Covid-19.

    For decades I have enjoyed the benefits of doing a Self-Full Body Connection or meditation or prayer at bedtime so I fall asleep in alignment. I use this metaphor: If your TV is on channel 19 when you fall asleep, it will still be on that channel when you wake up.

    With all the stress around the globe, most people are running the sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight) much of the time. Now, like never before, it is vital to bring ourselves back into alignment again and again.

    Ram Dass said that compassion is the ability to see how it all is. When you are worried about “X” or “Y” or “Z” your body is processing EVERYTHING via the sympathetic nervous system. Even if you worry yourself to a solution about SOMETHING, your TV is still set on channel 19.

    I saw a beautiful quotation by Haruki Murakami, a Japanese writer: “When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what the storm is all about.”

    How amazing that without being fabricated,
    This mind, which is unborn and primordially pure,
    Is spontaneously present from the very beginning!
    This self awareness is naturally free from the very first,
    How amazing that it is liberated by just resting — —
    At ease in whatever happens!

    Flight of the Garuda
    Lama Shabkar, Tsogdruk Rangdrol

    Think about activation of your sympathetic nervous system as being the storm. Not something outside of you, but what is happening inside. Think also about activation of your parasympathetic nervous system as being coming out of the storm. Also not something outside of you, but what is happening inside.

    True freedom is an inside job.

  • Trees!

    Sacred Stories

    She sent a tree emoji in a text message to a friend, including one with the yoga tree pose.

    A little later during a gathering via Zoom, several people expressed how trees help them get or stay grounded and centered. Late arriving to the group, one woman explained that she had been painting a tree, and even turned her iPad around to show the group the trees outside her window!

    While her phone’s ringer was off, she had received a text message from another friend. That friend was sharing a video of her baby daughter looking out the window, talking to the trees.

    The baby was so engaged with the trees she did not even respond when her mom softly called her name a couple of times.

    The only words in the text message were: She knows about the 🌲 🌳

  • Bluebird

    Sacred Stories

    His mother-in-law had passed and his wife’s family was gathering at their home to share a meal—safely, out-of-doors.

    After setting up tables and doing preparations, he was so surprised to see a bluebird visit.

    In over 35 years of living here, bluebirds had never been part of his backyard birds. His lot was too wooded.

    When the family moved to to the other side of the house to take advantage of shade, the bluebird followed.

    It was then he recognized the visitor!

  • You Are My Sunshine

    Sacred Stories

    After his uncle passed, he received a message to give to his aunt. It was the light-hearted song “You Are My Sunshine.”

    Although he felt a bit awkward with the message, he felt compelled by his uncle’s spirit.

    His aunt was so touched!

    “That was our song!” she exclaimed.

    They both knew he could not have ever guessed or made that up.

    This mind, which is unborn and primordially pure,
    is spontaneously present from the very beginning!
    ~ Flight of the Garuda, by Lama Shabkar, Tsogdruk Rangdrol

  • Don’t Go Back to Sleep

    This morning I saw a wonderful quotation by Bruce Chatwin, an English travel writer, novelist and journalist. Although Patagonia, his first book, cast him as a travel writer, in his own mind Chatwin was a storyteller. His true passion was bringing to light unusual tales.

    Chatwin’s quotation that caught my eye is: “Man’s real home is not a house but the road, and life itself is a journey to be walked on foot.”

    I was inspired to write the following poem.

    No “I”

    19 March 2007

    Seated in a large room
    filled to capacity with the
    community’s most
    influential

    “Modern medicine
    is
    like
    mopping up the mess
    without
    turning off
    the faucet”

    Someone
    in the audience
    asked
    “What is the difference
    between wellness and illness?”

    Placing the marker
    ceremoniously
    on the clean
    white page
    of the flip chart,
    Dean Ornish, M.D. wrote:

    WELLNESS
    ILLNESS

    Standing
    for a moment
    in stillness
    breathing
    before
    circling the ‘WE’ in wellness
    and the ‘I’ in illness

    before pausing again

    then speaking slowly

    “The difference
    between WE and I,”

    he continued

    “There is no “I”
    in wellness.”

    A few other comments from that talk:

    When you are going to indulge yourself, don’t tell yourself it is good for you.

    People are not afraid to make big life style changes, they have kids!

    These are choices worth making even if you don’t live one day more—because you will feel better.

    Pain is not the problem, it is just the messenger. Bypassing pain is like clipping the wires on your smoke detector and going back to sleep.

    I will close this post with a poem by Rumi, a 13th Century Persian poet, and Sufi mystic:

    Don’t Go Back to Sleep

    The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.
    Don’t go back to sleep.

    You must ask for what you really want.
    Don’t go back to sleep.

    People are going back and forth
    across the doorsill
    where the two worlds touch.

    The door is round and open.
    Don’t go back to sleep.

    Attending that talk way back in March of 2007, reading Rumi, being a Healing Touch Certified Practitioner and learning NLP and Hypnosis, has been my walking the journey of my life on foot. I have been and continue to be dedicated to helping Western medicine transition from an “I”llness based system to a “WE”llness based lifestyle.

    If you are reading this, that has been part of your life on foot, too.

    Don’t go back to sleep….

  • Catalpa Tree Magic

    Sacred Stories

    During break time on the last day of their meditation retreat, out for a bike ride, she stopped to take photos of some gorgeous blossoms on the side of the road.


    June afternoon dharma talks under the catalpa tree… blossoms drifing down on them. Fabulous fragrance. She knew the photos would be precious to her meditation teachers, and a friend who always attended the retreats too.

    She had ridden this same route the day before but had not noticed the blossoms. How could she have missed them? They were so beautiful and there so many of them!


    Sharing the photos with her sister they realized it was soooo significant for her to have seen the blossoms on Father’s Day. Their dad owned and operated a bait and tackle shop, and he always gathered the worms that fed on the catalpa trees!


    She shared this story with another meditation group a couple of days later. Several in the group had connections with catalpa trees, and one woman shared an amazing story. She had been told to choose a tree, put her forehead against that tree, and imagine connecting to the lead fairy of that specific tree species. Artists, they were to be able then to draw or paint the image. She chose a catalpa tree.

    Her fairy image was an Aboriginal-like child with wings where the ears would be!

    In the middle of the fairy’s forehead was a spout, out of which light and love and wisdom and blessing poured down upon anyone who was looking up at the tree.

    After sharing her drawing, she learned that the noun ‘catalpa’ derives from the Creek katáłpa, a compound word that translates literally as “winged head.”

  • Skies Upon Skies

    “Skies upon skies are available for your flight.”
    – Osho Zen Tarot

    I feel a little bit like the morning after Christmas, or the ninth day of Hanukkah. For the closing sharing of this eight-day Intensive/Retreat—the culmination of a two-year commitment to study and practice—I had written: When I logged on this morning, Dallas was the only other one online. I asked him about his virtual image in his background – a waterfall. I showed him a photo of me, also at a waterfall in Maui. We had a lovely visit and I am so glad we shared…

    That photo of me at the waterfall is framed and sits on my altar helping me value the dharma path that began long before I knew the word dharma.

    I was born in fear and I was living in fear. Not MY fear, but THE fear. My mother was informed that she had syphilis simultaneously with the discovery that she was pregnant. My first trimester in her womb was spent with my mom at a sanatorium being treated. She was angry, embarrassed, afraid….

    My alcoholic father had had sex with someone else, and that is how my mother got infected. I knew nothing of this until in my 40s when I began to have awareness of feeling unloved, unsafe, and unwanted. I was a successful professional, happily married, and I had had a good relationship with my mom. Nothing could account for those feelings, but I knew they were there.

    I knew I would benefit by uncovering the pain.

    In a hypnotic regression to the womb, hearing Les Crane sing Desiderata to me through headphones I had total realization of those feelings. Later I asked my mother if she could help me understand. She told me of the syphilis.

    Many of you were there when I shared this as part of “Listen to Your Mother” and it is still available on YouTube.

    The fear I lived with, the feelings of not loved, not safe, not wanted arose out of the human condition. I am so grateful to know the truth. Those feeling, any feelings, are not me nor mine.

    Instead of sharing all of those words as my closing, I simply shared a series of photos of the sky taken from the window in the guest/room office where I was “on retreat” for those eight days, and where I am now with my fingers on the keyboard, looking at the ever-changing sky:


    Aaron’s closing talk was brief and to the point:
    You have everything within you
    to co-create a future
    for the highest good of all beings.
    A future where beings are awake,
    free of suffering.


    Two years ago,
    we did not know that
    there was going to be
    a COVID-19 in our future.

    But of course,
    there would be something
    in our future.

    Some challenge.
    And you are meeting it with
    wisdom and open hearts.

    Please do not forget to imagine…
    to hold your heart open
    and picture an earth free of disease,
    free of hatred

    —an earth in which
    all sentient beings
    can truly flourish.
    May it be.
    May it be so.

  • Through the Darkness

    Start where you are,
    use what you have,
    do what you can.

    ~ Arthur Ashe

    I am tempted to schedule this to post so readers don’t know that I have my fingers on the keyboard at 4:21 am while on retreat. If I were not retreating via Zoom because of COVID-19, I would not have the option. I would have a room mate and I would be awake and watching the mind movements. I am awake. And I am watching the mind movements. And my fingers are on the keyboard.

    This week I have been doing seva (service) by transcribing audio for our teacher, Barbara Brodsky. Most of you know that Barbara is deaf. Because she is channeling the teachings, she “hears” what was taught only after someone listens to the voice memos and sends her a document. I have been doing that for her almost real time. This, along with Barbara’s releasing the raw audios to the students, is a huge change.

    The catalyst of these changes is COVID, but, the benefit of the changes is trust.

    Last night’s evening talk, a summary of this group’s two-year commitment to the Dharma Path, began with the question, “What is the Dharma Path?”

    First, is the truth of duhkha, a Sanskrit word usually thought to mean suffering. The clearest meaning is a wheel that is off center causing the vehicle (car or cart) to lurch. Lurching makes the ride very uncomfortable, further amplified by our expectation that the ride should be smooth.

    Human beings can get off center and lurch. Suffering because we have aversion to the lurching, we grasp for the expectation and desire for no lurching.

    COVID-19 has amplified the lurching, and the aversion and grasping. Lots of duhkha…. but there is a path out.

    Earlier in the retreat, we were to answer the questions, “In this moment, what is the hardest thing for me to hold in love? What seems to sit outside of the heart?” I wrote down one word: IGNORANCE. A saying that represents ignorance is rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic. Wasted effort. Squandered resources. Denial. Refusal to look with the eyes of love.

    A couple of evenings ago watching two juvenile birds at the bird bath inspired a poem:

    I AM That

    The juvenile bluebird
    standing stiffly
    in the center of the bird bath

    The young starling
    watching in amazement
    before jumping in and splashing exuberantly

    As much as saying
    “Here, I’ll show you
    so you can enjoy it too”

    Exiting the bath
    Making space for the willing-to-learn
    “I-can-do-that-too!”

    Bluebird to follow suit
    Again and again
    We teach and we learn

    We center our wheel by holding clearly in view several highest intentions for our lives. I wrote: I serve those who serve. I assist humanity to transcend seeming limitations and move out of delusion and awaken to our true power to bless all.

    Lofty aspirations, for sure, but we are not alone in these endeavors. The creator of worlds is here offering us support. We are often like that juvenile bluebird, standing stiffly in our human form, ignorant of the amazing joy available to us.

    There will always be pain. The conditions around the pandemic, racial inequality, violence, desperation, despair — lurching, lurching, lurching.

    As Chris McCall sang “Here I am Lord” for us I was crying like a baby. Many of us were. Humanity is tired of the uncomfortable lurching. “I will go, Lord, if you lead me, I will hold your people in my heart.”

    If a juvenile bluebird and a juvenile starling can do it, so can we. We are not just humans. We are also divine.

    One of the closing lines in last night’s dharma talk: “Ahhhh, I see we have passed through the darkness….”