Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: DebraBasham.com

  • What Are You Doing Today?

    The farmer may only be planting a seed,
    but if he opens his eyes
    he is feeding the whole world.
    ~ Omaha Bee

    This opening quotation kicked off a precious story about a three-person construction crew who was approached by a man asking what each was doing. The first said he was working for pittance and was getting tired, the second said he was laying concrete, the third (a woman, in the version I read) said, “I am building a hospital where people will receive needed medical care and many lives will be saved.”

    The man responded, “Yes… You are building my hospital.”

    The man was the benefactor, and he made the woman head over the entire project.

    I don’t know if this story actually happened as it is written, but the essence of this story is happening all over the planet at every moment as we are either working for a pittance, laying concrete, or saving lives.

    What are you doing today?

    Deep Spring Center
    Thought for Today

    You ask why there seem to be increasing obstacles. If you’re muddling around thinking about being more loving and caring and connected in your lives but not really doing much about it, negative polarity can relax. They see you’re not really getting anywhere. Since WWII, there has been a tremendous move toward positive polarity in the world. Many old souls are coming into birth, especially in the past 30 years. Here are many beings really intent on finding a way to live with love in the world rather than with an ‘eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth’ doctrine. Negative polarity looks around and says, ‘What’s happening? This is getting out of hand! Look how loving they’re becoming. Let’s toss in some opposition here.’ ~ Aaron

    Deep Spring has a new blog! Here is a link to the first post: The Vibration of Love is Protection from COVID-19

    Sign up to receive all of the posts real-time!!!

  • Angie’s Mom

    Sacred Stories

    “How is your yoga practice working or not working for you?” the yoga instructor asked as they began the second yoga retreat using the Zoom platform since the beginning of the pandemic.

    One woman confessed she had been having difficulty finding a location in her home to practice yoga. She said she was currently in her bedroom, which offers the best space, but she would be lying on a dirty rug that smelled like dog.

    They had only recently lost Angie…

    The Zoom host read a powerful paragraph from The Dharma of Dogs: Our Best Friends as Spiritual Teachers, by Tami Simon.

    “The pain of her death was exquisite. I cried for weeks, but felt an incredible joy and comfort that was an equal part of the grief. I was so grateful that I had spent time with her — only with her, fully present and joyful.” (p.163)

    The host mentioned that an online grief journey group attended by a mutual friend of Angie’s mom would be meeting virtually the following day from 4-6 pm. The mutual friend was currently in Atlanta — awaiting the welcoming of a new grandchild — and would not be in attendance. The yoga instructor said she also attends the group (her husband had passed seven months earlier) and would be there.

    Just as the invitation to attend the grief journey group for support was being offered Angie’s mom, a text message popped in from the friend in Atlanta!

    There is no such thing as accident; it is fate misnamed. ~ Napoleon Bonaparte

  • Order, Disorder, Reorder

    Twelve minutes late coming to join the Southern Circle Poets writing group, I have been transplanting some flowering things that have been blooming beautifully along the left edge of our driveway all summer. We are scheduled to have work begin tearing up the old concrete and blacktop, and putting in a continuous concrete driveway from the sidewalk to the door of our barn. John hopes it will work for shuffleboard!!!

    Yesterday when I mentioned my desire to transplant the flowering things, he queried as to if they were wildflowers or weeds. “What is the difference?” I asked. “Perhaps we just call them weeds because no one sells them at the garden shoppe.” They are beautiful, they are healthy, and they are contributing oxygen to the planet. It is worth a try to keep them alive….

    Simultaneously, I have been going through major disorder in my front bedroom/office/meditation hall. My HP PC crossed the rainbow bridge. (English: My desktop computer cannot be repaired.) I had big stuff tied to that PC: a big tower, a huge monitor, an external camera, a professional Brother laser printer, great-sounding Bose speakers. The PC’s valued accessories generated a need within me to hold onto it all when we downsized three years ago. And now what was is no more.



    Things have changed, and I am now working towards freeing up space. I will use my laptop as my ONLY computer. Unless you count my iPhone….

    So for days now I have been purging files to get the contents of four two-drawer file cabinets down to three.

    I am still somewhat in grief about my Brother printer. This has been a fantastic printer. I have cranked out client intake forms, NLP certificates, myriad lunch-and-learn handouts, and lots of poetry.

    Perhaps it has not yet been determined what will go or stay. Not only is this printer quite large, but the installation is on a CD and my laptop does not have a CD player. I know one can purchase an external CD player but I just don’t know if I want to accommodate the size of this printer.

    I will figure it out as I go along. I did determine that I can use my Bose speakers with my laptop when I want really good sound.

    Things are in disorder around schools. Two Midwestern universities announced on Tuesday that they will be modifying their fall plans because of the coronavirus pandemic. University of Notre Dame has suspended all in-person classes for at least two weeks due to the swell of coronavirus since students returned August 10. A letter from the President of Michigan State University stated: “Effective immediately, we are asking undergraduate students who planned to live in our residence halls this fall to stay home and continue their education with MSU remotely.”

    A friend who teaches K-12 was struggling with whether or not to take an early retirement from teaching. An important piece for her is that she can now retire with medical benefits — a big deal as she is a survivor of breast cancer.

    So much is going on. Old habit energy is amplified. Some people are paralyzed by panic. Others are already seeing opportunities opening up. I suggested my friend might benefit by creating and using a breath prayer, such as “I will figure it out as I go along….”

    My friend laughed so hard she cried, but the truth is we have all been doing that all along. In this ‘disorder’ phase we can see that clearly. It allows you to relax about it.

    I have found things in this office space while purging that I did not even know I had. You do want to keep the important stuff. As you anticipate reorder, notice what is truly important. Let go of the everything else. We will figure it out as we go along…

    Look at all the space that is being created!

  • All is Well

    Sacred Stories

    She had been nursing a bruised left foot for over a week when her friend suggested they look up the metaphysical meaning of bruise in Heal Your Body by Louise Hay.


    Louise says, “In order to permanently eliminate a condition, we must first dissolve the mental cause.” Her friend put down the phone, grabbed her copy of the book, picked up the phone, and read to her:

    Bruises (Ecchymoses)

    Probable Cause:
    The little bumps in life. Self-punishment.

    The affirmation:
    I love and cherish myself.
    I am kind and gentle with me.
    All is well.

    Mere moments before she had called her friend that morning she placed one of her “beach-stone-beauties” on the counter in the kitchen where her cat, Bella, eats.

    The words she had painted on the stone spoke directly to Louise Hay’s suggested affirmation for her bruised foot!

    All is well. And it will be well.

  • Mario’s Italian Market Remains!

    In response to “When Everything Falls Apart, What Remains?” posting, I received a precious email message from a Florida writer-friend.

    Thank you, Paul, for igniting my heart by sharing your powerful writing of your poignant experience.

    (Soft edits only!)

    Welcome to the Yellow Brick Road, and please come again….

      Dear Debra,

      I stared at the title of your recent blog for moments before I opened and read the email.

      The title described exactly, in a few short words, what I’ve been feeling for weeks. Seems that we’ve experienced a string of negative events these past few months that have made July/August 2020 among the most unforgettable in recent memory.

      I’ve tried to remain positive, yet have found this challenging.

      Although not the root cause, COVID-induced separation is a likely contributor to a nagging sense of disconnect.

      I wonder sometimes if we’ve gotten too good at “social distancing.” We stay at home; work from home in separate rooms; spend all day in different mindsets. We frown under our mask if someone is shopping in the wrong direction in the supermarket aisle. We are cautioned to avoid people who are sick, when we used to be encouraged to do the opposite.

      E.M. Forster begins his novel “Howard’s End” with the words “only connect.”

      A final thought on human interaction and connectedness: One of our favorite activities since moving to Southwest Florida is shopping at Mario’s Italian Market in Fort Myers.

      Having grown up in Brooklyn with parents who were raised in Little Italy, I feel qualified to comment on the salumeria experience in America.

      The magic of Mario’s is that everyone there—regardless of ethnicity or nationality—is for that moment bound together by a familiarity and fondness for this food. We make sure that number 75 doesn’t answer before we hold up our ticket number 76. We ask the woman who ordered the long-hot peppers if they’re really hot; she replies with a smile and left-right wag of her hand. The counter man offers a sample slice of Calabrian salami—an inducement to order a half-pound instead of a quarter. We discuss the merits of gorgonzola versus blue cheese with a stranger.

      Perhaps this is what will remain when everything falls apart.

    Perhaps, when everything falls apart, what remains is everything that is loved….

    You are loved, Paul!

  • When Everything Falls Apart, What Remains?

    I am technically practicing silence in a meditation retreat at Heartwood Refuge and Retreat Center in Hendersonville, North Carolina. But I am attending via Zoom and my fingers are on the keyboard. The focus of this retreat with John Orr is When Everything Falls Apart, What Remains? This was John’s blurb about the retreat:

      Our world has seen a massive upheaval as a result of the coronavirus pandemic, the continuing racism and political divisiveness. We are all having to deal with changes in our lives and the communities we live in. At times it may seem like everything is falling apart and we are left with a profound feeling of uncertainty. Now more than ever the dharma and our meditation practice can be a refuge to meet the present challenges.

      During this retreat we will explore the ancient teachings of:

      The Don’t Know Mind (making friends with uncertainty)

      Impermanence (this too shall pass)

      Dissolution (when everything falls apart, what remains?)

      Non Duality (Something isn’t separate from Everything)

      Our meditation draws on Mindfulness, Vipassana and Pure Awareness. Clear instruction will be offered for all levels.

      Loving Kindness and Compassion Meditation and chanting are also part of our retreat together. A special focus will be how to practice and hold our hearts open with the inconvenience, discomfort and uncertainty of today’s world.

    On Wednesday afternoon before the retreat began, I had yet another tender conversation with our daughter about our diverse approach to precautions related to this virus. We did not argue, but we make very different choices. A few hours later, during the opening introductions, I received news from a good friend–also attending via Zoom–that she was not feeling well. Here is the rest of the story, posted on Facebook a few moments ago in response to another friend, Kate:

    Kate posted:
    I feel like I’m one of the few people still practicing social distancing, and sheltering in place. FB is full of pics of people out to restaurants, at pools and beaches or sharing space with relatives they haven’t seen in awhile. I would love to see our kids but I can’t guarantee I’m not infected nor can they. Am I just over sensitive to this?

    I responded to Kate:
    Kate, THANK YOU! I could have written this post. Today I would add that another friend, thinking the same way you and I have been thinking, relented and got together with her family.

    Her adult children drove in from out of state, each household traveling in separate vehicles, taking proper precautions along way.

    Each household brought a tent. My friend rented a party-potty and set up an outdoor kitchen. My friend’s family did not enter her house, and when the family went hiking each family drove in his/her own car. They maintained social distance along the trail.

    Shortly after they arrived, her daughter’s partner received a call from work that his colleague had tested positive. He got in their vehicle and drove to the nearest location and had a Covid test.

    Of course the results from his test didn’t come back until AFTER he was already back home, and not until AFTER he was already symptomatic. His test came back positive.

    On Wednesday evening, gathered via Zoom, my friend reported that she had a “wicked cold” and had gone to get a Covid test. She would know in a week.

    Yesterday, she sent a private message via Zoom chat, “I tested positive. I have COVID.”

    Even the precautions level that you and I are committed to, may not be enough….

    Kate, keep teaching by example! So much to learn from this.

    ❤️🙏🏼🦋

    Deep Spring Center
    Thought for Today

    It is not the teacher who is the authority; it is the dharma that is the authority. It is sati, mindful presence, which is the authority. It is awareness, which is the authority. It is the deeply loving and open heart that is the authority. It is the Ground of Being, the divine essence of each, which is the authority. The teacher who has done his or her work, understands the practice and has developed a depth of realization of how things are, has no need to be the authority to another, but is willing to offer what he or she knows with a certainty, offering it for the guidance of others, but with no need to say, ‘This is it!’ If it really is it, others will discover that through their own practice. ~ Aaron

  • Our “Tardiff”

    Sacred Stories

    She was sending a photo to a friend when the auto correct change “our yard” to our “Tardiff.” which just happens to be the last name of friends. He had passed away over ten years ago, and she had not seen his wife in quite a while.

    She took a screen shot, and sent it to Mrs. Tardiff.



    Mrs. Tardiff quickly wrote back:

      Interesting! Today I signed the papers for transfer of Title of the land (BOMARSH – wild Flowers) to our Amish next door neighbor. He has been taking care of the field for the last 12 years. I allow him to hunt on it. Now he is allowing my son to continue to hunt on it.

      It was what Bob wanted. If our neighbor didn’t want the land it was to be given to the land conservatives (but then no one could hunt on it). Bob didn’t want a McMansion built there.

      Sad, but happy day for me. The timing is a sign to me that it’s OK to move forward.

      Thanks, I really needed confirmation!

  • Ambiguous Moth

    Sacred Stories

    “Do you know what kind of moth this is?” she asked, texting a photo to her sister.

    Within moments her sister had sent an identification link to the Ambiguous Moth.

    These moths had been coming into their master bedroom every night — entering from the former screen porch that was being transformed into her husband’s art studio.

    Her husband spent the next day filling in all the entry gaps, and the following morning they were thrilled to wake to a bedroom free of their ambiguous friends.

    Coming in after a few minutes outside this was on his back:

    Moth medicine meaning: Moth medicine’s meaning is resurrection and transformation. A moth represents tremendous change, but it also seeks the light. Thus, moth spiritual meaning is to trust the changes that are happening and that freedom and liberation are around the corner.

    Perhaps not so ambiguous after all….

  • Transformation

    Recently, I included some information about transformation from J. Krishnamurti in my clergy “Insight’s” article.

    Transformation is said to occur only when NONE of the following are present:

      desire to change the experience
      judgment
      analysis
      justification
      grasping
      selfing
      resisting
      believing that “I am witnessing”

    Since the coronavirus stay-safe-at-home order in March, I have done daily yoga with Kathy Zerler. We started out by phone, but when it became obvious that the YMCA could not safely and legally hold the classes onsite any time soon, we started recording her yoga classes using Zoom. Kathy’s videos are available on Youtube by putting “Kathy Zerler yoga” into your search engine.

    This morning I had a heart-felt experience of transformation — exactly as Krishnamurti describes it — during the guided meditation at the end of class. “Your World is Your Greatest Creation” was published in Kathy’s Joyful Meditaions:

    Imagine yourself on a solitary beach at sunset. You are very relaxed after a long day…

    You come upon a raft that is half on the beach and half in the water. Your name is written on a flag that waves from a mast in the center of the raft. You understand that this raft is yours to use for as long as you need it. You decide to load up every person who has ever hurt you. Politely, you help each person onto the raft. When they are all seated, you toss in the baggage they have heaped on you along with a few things of your own that you no longer need. You push the raft out toward the setting sun and watch as these people and their baggage float out of your life.

    You are allowed to let them go. Just let them go….

    I have heard Kathy do this guided meditation several times before, but something truly remarkable happened today when the only person that got into the raft was me!

    I was alone in the raft and I could see clearly that only my distorted thoughts, beliefs, attitudes had hurt me.

    I gently oared the raft toward the setting sun in perfect peace.

    Transformation….

  • To Open or Not to Open

    Acceptance is the goal —
    acceptance and freedom to choose what we want and need to do
    to take care of ourselves with that person.

    We can become free of the patterns of the past.

    We are recovering.

    Progress is the goal.

    ~ The Language of Letting Go,
    Daily Meditations on Codependency
    by Melody Beattie

    Last evening I received an email message from our local YMCA with a subject line: Action Needed! Ask state lawmakers to reopen your Y!

    This morning in an online news article Dr. Fauci warns of “early signs” that an outbreak could be brewing in Tennessee, Kentucky, Ohio and Indiana. Right now, 93%, or 89 of Tennessee’s 95 counties, have a transmission rate “above the threshold.”

    Related to the coronavirus, most everyone would agree that progress is the goal. Obviously, however, opinions differ regarding in which direction progress lays.

    A friend heard on the news this morning that risk of exposure in our area is currently 4%. Her comment was that the low percentage may give people the feeling that not complying with guidelines (primarily wearing masks and maintaining safe distancing) is safe.

    I said, “If you want to untangle a knotted string, it is crucial to know which end of the string you are holding.”

    Four percent is a direct result of the strict guidelines that have been in place. The number does not mean, “Oh, we don’t have much Covid, so lets throw a big party to celebrate.” Rather, what it really means is, “Thankfully, our actions are making a difference, and lives are being saved. We can get through this together.”

    I took two photos this morning. One is a stink bug on my kitchen window; the other a moth on my office window.


    Seeing the delicate moth generated an inner smile; the big fat stink bug, repulsion.

    I understand businesses wanting to reopen, but is reopening an indoor exercise facility wise? Is sending out an email message urging members to pressure lawmakers to allow them to reopen a responsible act?

    This morning as I notice my inner preferences, I open email to the quotation from Abraham Hicks:

    If you will simply imagine your life as you want it to be, all cooperative components will be summoned. And even more important, all components that are summoned will cooperate. It is Law. The experience that you have with others is about what you evoke from them.

    Excerpted from The Vortex on 8/31/09

    Our Love,
    Esther
    (and Abraham and Jerry)

    I imagine Tennessee learning from Florida. I imagine Y members writing to the Y expressing the willingness to be patient. I imagine the stinky and the delicate co-existing in the balance of nature. I imagine acceptance and freedom to choose what we want and need to do to take care of ourselves…. I imagine all beings coming to the end of suffering.