Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: wisdom

  • Many Happy Returns

      “Whether we have happiness or not depends on the seeds in our consciousness. If our seeds of compassion, understanding, and love are strong, those qualities will be able to manifest in us. If the seeds of anger, hostility and sadness in us are strong, then we will experience much suffering. To understand someone, we have to be aware of the quality of the seeds in his consciousness. And we need to remember that his is not solely responsible for those seeds. His ancestors, parents, and society are co-responsible for the quality of the seeds in his consciousness. When we understand this, we are able to feel compassion for that person. With understanding and love, we will know how to water our own beautiful seeds and those of others, and we will recognize seeds of suffering and find ways to transform them.”

      ― Thích Nhất Hạnh, Your True Home: The Everyday Wisdom of Thich Nhat Hanh: 365 days of practical, powerful teachings from the beloved Zen teacher

    These words from Nhất Hạnh opened our practice this morning, January 30, 2021. What a powerful lesson to remember on the birthday of two people I love. One (a woman) is younger than I, and the other (a man) is slightly my elder. I cannot say for sure how I will be when I am his age, but I am old enough already to have compassion for the aging process.

    One of the members of Deep Spring Sangha lost his grandfather this week. One of the members of the Zen Empty Circle sangha lost his sister this week as well. Since the practice today was dedicated to her, Jerry Ashmore’s dharma talk began, “We don’t know for sure what happens after we die. At least I don’t. That’s absolutely the don’t know mind. The question I often ask myself is how can we make their death meaningful when a loved one passes?”

    Jerry continued with the following story:

    A student asks how to prepare for death.

    “When you die, and you are reborn, how can you be reborn in a good place, into a positive rebirth?” the Buddha asks the student.

    “Well,” the student replies, “I have to live a life of wisdom and compassion.”

    “Yes,” the Buddha agrees, “if you live a life of wisdom and compassion, you will have a favorable rebirth. Now, what if there is no rebirth, what will you do? What can you do to live a happy life?”

    “Well, I have to live a life of wisdom and compassion….”

    Jerry’s conclusion from this story is if we live a life of wisdom and compassion the afterlife will take care of itself.

    The sangha member who had just lost his sister wished she could have seen herself through the eyes of those who benefited from her life. She had been sober for 30 years. One person called to offer condolences saying because of his sister, she herself had been sober for 28 years!

    While we may have some moments of missed opportunities for living life with wisdom and compassion, our lives are filled with lasting moments of wisdom and compassion. Any missed opportunity is simply another invitation.


    Birthday Candles

    It’s a happy ritual
    meant to remind us that
    all we hope to have and be
    begins with a little
    wishing.

    ~ Meanings of Life – A Cardthartic Experience

    May all beings have a happy life, many happy birthdays, and many happy returns!

  • Make May Day a Mask Day

    Today is May Day.
    It is a day to hang flowers
    on the door of someone you love.

    In 1886, more than 300,000 workers walked off their jobs demanding 13,000 businesses honor an 8-hour work day on May Day.

    We know the value of doing something that benefits another. And we value doing what benefits us. Making May Day 2020 a Mask Day is a way of doing both.

    The Task of the Mask

    Beneath the mask, beyond the persona,
    beside your humanity is your true divine nature
    My friend died last week
    she went into the hospital with acute pancreatitis
    Her final ride home was on the coronavirus

    People keep asking
    if the masks are necessary
    They think they
    or the ones they love to touch
    Are surely free from COVID-19

    Another friend wore her mask
    while the plumber came to plumb
    But she did not ask him to
    protect her from his exposure
    I once hit a dog, driving home in the dark

    Would that plumber sadly feel
    remorse—a lifetime of guilt
    Were he without malice aforethought
    to have left the grim reaper running amok?
    He thought he came to help

    One simple “No,” fueled by true compassion
    is an act of wisdom and kindness for all
    I said “No,” when asked if I would consider
    coming to the cemetery or funeral home
    Doing a short ceremony for my beloved friend

    “Let’s wait and do a memorial together,
    really honoring her”

    Let’s wait
    Let’s not waste a moment
    Each time you act from wisdom
    and compassion
    You are revealing your divinity

    Debra Basham May 1, 2020 (WC 190)

    We may not be able to hang flowers in person on the door of every person we love today, but we can make this May Day a Make-a-Mask day.

    Making a no-sew sock mask is easy!


    Let me know if you would like to see the little video instructions.

    Is the task of the mask necessary? You can bet your sweet life on it….

  • Know Your DNA?

    It is Labor Day Weekend. For everyone here in Michigan, public schools are starting next week. The weather has taken a turn toward the cool, and the prairies are looking quite like autumn. Change is palpable….

    As I sit at my desk, looking out over the back yard, working at the keyboard, Hummingbirds are chasing one another away from the feeder. Even a bee is joining in with this game, each claiming territory and working hard to maintain it.

    I just watched a very interesting 5 minute video. A roomful of people were discussing how each felt some bias against other nationalities. These individuals were then each asked to undergo a DNA test. The results were quite shocking and rather life-changing…

    That we belong to one another is not a surprise to those with a spiritual leaning. That is why my email signature line is a quotation by Mother Teresa: “If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.” Our connection comes as no surprise to scientists either. The evidence has proven we actually all have more in common than we ever imagined.

    Although scientists have long recognised that, despite physical differences, all human populations are genetically similar, the new work concludes that populations from different parts of the world share even more genetic similarities than previously assumed.

    All humans are 99.9 per cent identical and, of that tiny 0.1 per cent difference, 94 per cent of the variation is among individuals from the same populations and only six per cent between individuals from different populations.

    (See 0.1 per cent difference.)

    Bertrand Russell says, “There is no reason to suppose that the world had a beginning at all. The idea that things must have a beginning is really due to the poverty of our thoughts.” Possibly, it is this same poverty of our thoughts that had allowed people to think any group was superior and/or any other group was inferior. Perhaps as science and spirituality shine new perspectives on the same truth, humans may find it is easy now to feel our connections to one another and to all sentient beings.

    We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honor the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness and affection.

    Love is not something we give or get; it is something that we nurture and grow, a connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within each one of them – we can only love others as much as we love ourselves.

    Shame, blame, disrespect, betrayal, and the withholding of affection damage the roots from which love grows. Love can only survive these injuries if they are acknowledged, healed and rare.

    Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are

    Yes, if everyone just had that DNA test done, you would have proof of the truth. School is starting. The season is changing. This is the time to embrace who we really are…