Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: transformation

  • Banner

    This morning I was dreaming upon waking: I am in my final childhood home. The basement is flooded. At the bottom of the stairs, it is over ankle deep. I go down and start moving stuff to get the door open so we can get the water out. A man and woman are outside waiting for me to give the word. (Mom and dad?) It is quite dark down here and the water is cold, but I stay focused and am making good progress before I wake up .

    After I am up and have written down my dream I look up the dream symbolism: Wet basement in dream meaning: Unprocessed emotions, hidden stress or deep unconscious overwhelm. In dream symbolism, a house represents your inner self, the basement reflects your foundational unconscious or past, and water stands for your feelings. Emotional overload/ feelings or responsibilities you have bottled up that are now seeping into your awareness.

    This reminds me of yesterday’s sharing with our eldest grand, Brad, about giving ourselves a pass….

    I went to visit a dear, dear, friend today. We spoke candidly about the difficulty that can come when there is need to be a receiver of care. We so prefer to be the one giving.

    I shared part of Barbara Brodsky’s blog post from a few days ago.

    Three nights ago, at bedtime, my beloved almost 11 year old collie, Banner, (my hearing – dog) suddenly could not stand up. We have a routine of many years; I shut off the tv or close my book, say ”bed time” and we both get up quickly and head to the bedroom. He tried to stand; his 4 paws were sliding to the sides on the hardwood floor, with no traction, and he couldn’t get them under him. He was terrified.

    I woke up Hal’s caregiver who lives downstairs and he brought up the old living room rug that we’d stored in the basement for wheelchair/ walker safety, put it down and lifted him on top of it and Banner rested there for 15 minutes while I just patted him and spoke to him. Then I got up and he did too. Just stood up!

    Our human minds return to “I can’t” and fear. His mind and body just responded by standing to follow me to the bedroom. The next day, he was happily playing with our granddaughter, with no sign of weakness. Fear and its stories really do block us humans from a deeper reality.

    Today I could feel in both my friend and myself the letting down of old habits of wanting to not need help. Then this afternoon, I opened email from my mentor/friend Betty Lue Lieber, in which she had included the message for today from the Daily Word:

    Pray for Others

    Praying for others is a sacred gift I love to give.

    Friday July 24, 2026

    When a friend or loved one is going through a challenge, I try to help however I can. When I’ve offered all I can and it seems there is nothing else I can do, I pray.

    Prayer is the greatest gift I have to give. Regardless of whether someone knows I am praying, my prayers enfold them in love and care. As I pray, I feel my connection in Spirit to that person. I touch the presence of infinite light, life, love, and peace within them. I have faith these qualities are opening the avenue to unlimited good.

    My prayer extends from my circle of loved ones to enfold my larger community and the world. I pray each person knows they deserve a joyous, prosperous, fulfilling life.

    I have prayed for you that your own faith may not fail.—Luke 22:32

    This brings to mind the Biblical story of a man who had been paralysed for 38 years. Jesus simply told him to pick up his mat and walk. May we, may all beings, receive support and love and encouragement so completely we, too, can be freed from suffering.

    (Also from Betty Lue’s message:)
    “Prayer For A Loved One”

    Dear Heart,
    I will not worry, fret or be unhappy over you.
    I will not be anxious concerning you.
    I will not be afraid for you.
    I will not give up on you.
    I will not blame, criticize or condemn you.
    I will remember first, last and always that you are God’s child, that you have His Spirit in you.
    I will trust this Spirit to take care of you, to be a light to your path, to provide for your needs.
    I will think of you as always being surrounded by God’s loving Presence, enfolded in His protecting care, as kept safe and secure in Him.
    I will be patient with you.
    I will have confidence in you.
    I will stand by you in faith, and bless you in my prayers, knowing that you are growing, knowing that you are finding the help you need, the love you need, the healing you need, the financial freedom you need.
    I have only good feelings in my heart about you.
    I am willing to let you live your life as you see fit.
    Your way may not be my way, but I will trust the Spirit of God in you to show you the way of your highest Good.
    God loves you and I love you!
    I have confidence in you and I believe in you!!
    (author unknown)

  • D-O-N-N-Y

    At over ninety years of age, it is a shock to lose an adult child. Her son, Donny, had passed two years prior when she had the phone ring just one ring and stop.

    Once.

    Twice.

    Three times.

    She decided to go to the phone in the house that had a caller identification feature. She could have never imagined what she would see when the phone rang a fourth time!

    The caller ID showed five simple letters that meant everything to her: D-O-N-N-Y

    Many cultures interpret sudden electronic malfunctions or random rings as a comforting psychological or spiritual sign of remembrance. To this day, she draws comfort from his call.

  • Mints – A Double

    Soon after the husband of her friend had passed the white-with-red-stripes, soft, sugary mints he loved gifting to his wife started showing up. (See “Mints”.)

    For over 20 years now, this particular type of soft mint had been recognized as a welcome message of his everlasting love!

    While planning to be visiting with their family in Tennessee, they learned the husband of a couple they had gotten to know through their daughter had just died. The funeral was taking place while they were there and they were going to be able to go. In the long line waiting to visit with the wife before the funeral started, she spotted a dish of the special mints across the room. She went over, picked up two, snapped a photo, and sent that to her friend.

    After the funeral, as she was exiting the building, she walked back to the bowl to get a few more for her friend. When she looked closer, there was a double!

    The precious response to this photo of the double was, “I am always touched when a double appears.”

    It seemed a perfect assurance that this friend, too, would be faithfully watching over his wife….

  • Molly and OJ’s

    He went out with friends for the first time in over a year — not since his wife had been diagnosed with brain cancer.

    Molly and OJ’s had about 40 moon-shaped lights ceiling lights.

    As they began talking and laughing about old times, the light directly above him at their table started flashing!

    Every time he started laughing, that light started blinking!

    They all said, “There’s our Eli!”❤️❤️❤️

  • Door Prize!

    His wife had just passed on June 28. Friends were telling him the importance of doing those things they loved doing, even if it was difficult. So, he took the car to the Ridgetown Rotary Antique Car and Tractor Show, Sunday, July 12, 2026, at Watson Grove Park.

    When the winning number for the door prize was called, his was just two digits off. They were all joking that she was trying to help him win but she missed the mark by just a bit!

    The number was announced again. After a third time when no one came forth to claim the prize, it was announced another ticket would be drawn.

    He won!

    He got a battery booster, and a $75 dollar certificate toward new tires.

    If his ticket number had been called the first time they might have missed it. The most valuable “prize” he won was blessed assurance she really was still helping him….

  • “Lefty”

    His daughter let him know of the passing of an out-of-state friend. He was scheduled to be visiting his daughter and family the following week. He could be there to attend the funeral. Sitting down at the dining table to eat his breakfast he began reading the obituary, and casually said aloud, “Alexa, shuffle songs by Merle Haggard.”

    He had not really been noticing what was playing. But the line, “Lefty, he can’t sing the blues all night long like he use to,” from the song Lefty and Poncho certainly caught his attention. He knew it was a God-incidence.

    Although he had never known their friend’s formal name, the obituary read:

    John Alvin “Lefty” Barnett!

    A wave doesn’t just roll into the shore. It also rolls back out to sea. If it didn’t roll back out to sea, it couldn’t roll into the shore. And that is the human existence. If we didn’t come into these bodies, we wouldn’t leave these bodies. And if we didn’t leave these bodies, we wouldn’t come into these bodies. That is the nature of the eternal existence. ~ Debra Basham 7-10-2026

  • 4th of July Call for Help


    They were camping for the 4th of July weekend. While riding their new electric bikes to the evening’s bonfire, he thought he heard a male voice. Stopping to listen closely, he realized it was someone calling out for help.

    Following the calls, he located an older man by an overturned golf cart. The cart had flipped over pinning the man’s wife underneath! Quickly calling 911, what seemed a supernatural source of energy allowed him to lift the golf cart off of her.

    “Do not move her,” he was instructed. Taking charge, he directed campers who had come to see what the commotion was to leave the area. He stayed with the couple, supporting them until the medical team arrived and could safely transport her. He was very thankful for the news that although the woman’s pelvis was broken, she was expected to recover fully.

    Hearing details of her grandson’s unexpected 4th of July encounter, his grandmother told him, “There are angels in this world. You were an angel to this couple when you answered the call for help.”

    In many respects, this experience aligns perfectly with accounts in the gospels. Jesus did not operate like a modern crisis responder traveling the globe on a schedule; rather, His ministry was deeply relational and situational. He primarily ministered to the people He physically encountered as He walked through towns, taught on hillsides, or sat at meals.

  • Best I Can Do

    Once again, I appreciate not knowing things until after the fact. This time it was watching the 2025 film “Best I Can Do” which stars Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick as a couple in a romantic, character-driven dramedy about aging.

    I did not know they are a real life couple. They first met when she was just 12 years old and he was 19; she saw him in an off-Broadway play and briefly spoke to him at a deli, an encounter he initially didn’t remember. They officially connected on the set of “Lemon Sky” in 1987. Following a whirlwind romance, Bacon proposed on Christmas Eve of 1987, and they tied the knot less than a year later. They are one of Hollywood’s most enduring couples.

    This film follows a security guard (Bacon) who develops an unlikely connection with a urologist (Sedgwick) and explores themes of life’s challenges and finding new hope. Seems relevant to many of us right now.

    I thought the closing scene was brilliant. Admittedly, we were watching it during the visitation in Canada of a dear Florida friend who passed on Monday. Monday, June 28 was also the birthday of my (late) mother-in-law, the birthday of my eldest nephew, and the birth of our god daughter’s first grand baby.

    Here is a photo of our friend (on the left) with our daughter when we were together in February, 2025, enjoying a boat ride and having lunch on Captiva.

    Early morning texting with her husband included a message that is spoken quite often during this time in our lives. “You are right about how loved she is/was/will continue to be. You won’t stop loving her. We won’t. And she won’t stop loving us. We will miss her physical being with us like crazy…. Don’t say goodbye, say aloha. You don’t have to wait until you are out of your body to be together again. You can learn to be together with her not in a physical body, while you are still in one.”

    I will not give anything away about that closing scene because you might want to experience the film for yourself. It was powerful before I learned that the couple is a real-life couple, but the emotions I felt seemed even more significant after I discovered that.

    Best I can do is to say this has been quite a week….

  • The Way Forward

    Last evening as I was crawling in to bed, I checked the Facebook page of my niece. She is an amazingly inspiring woman, and often I am uplifted by the video-to-music posts of the “nature” of her life: cats, dogs, butterflies, moths, and (more recently again) chickens. Last night’s post was not of the same emotional tone:

      Things are quiet and sad in the coop tonight, and it’s hard to hold back tears. For the first time ever, we experienced a dog attack on our flock, and 9 of them were killed. One more is showing signs of shock or internal injuries, and I’m not sure she’s going to pull through.
      The dog belongs to a young couple who live at the farm across the field. The dog had had been doing fine off-leash on their property, and was far enough away that she couldn’t even see our place. For whatever reason, she wandered farther away this afternoon, and saw our chickens. By the time Brian could get out to catch her, she had killed 9 of them. With 60+ in the flock, and several of each kind in most cases, it’s hard to know which ones I lost. I do know I lost one of my little silkies that I adore. I’m worried that I’ll have a moment of realizing certain favorites are gone.
      Even though I don’t ever want the dog to be able to come onto our property again, I still feel really sad for her because of the freedom she’ll lose because of this. And I feel sad for her owners, too. It’s never a good feeling when your dog does something that causes pain for someone else. I told them I didn’t want them to view her differently. She just followed instincts, and had no idea what her actions would cause.
      It had already been a difficult few days because of three wild animal deaths I witnessed. I tried to turn my car around to save a young groundhog that was wandering on the road – only to watch another car hit it. I picked up the box turtle that had badly injured by a car, took it to Paw Paw to a vet that works with replies. Found out later its injuries were too severe, and it had to be put to sleep. Then I saw a post about baby raccoons who were displaced when workers cut down a tree. The babies were scared and running back and forth across the road. By the time I got there, two of them had already been killed on the road, and I couldn’t find any other ones.
      All of that being said, I’m just really grieving tonight. Loving animals brings some real pain along with all the joy.

    All of this comes along with preparations I am navigating for my being blessed to guest pastor at St. John UCC again — this time on the 29th anniversary of my ordination July 12, 1997. The theme of this sharing is “The Way Forward.”

    I wrote to my niece right away saying I was awake if she needed to talk. When I did not hear back from her I continued to pray as sleep came.

    Awake VERY early, I found the opening paragraph timely in Barbara Brodsky’s blog post: “I’ve been looking at feelings of powerlessness this morning. What is power? Are we ever truly without it? These pictures are not about my garden but about life, about all the things I feel are out of control. When that ‘no control’ feeling comes, it’s the inner contraction and negativity that really stops me, and creates a blockage of energy, much more than any external force.”

    I also saw an invitation to a 3-day program by Heart Mind Institute, DAY 1: Effort Doesn’t Calm the Nervous System. Before I left my bed, I listened and then did the Surrogate Tapping exercise by Jessica Ortner of The Tapping Solution.

    After a cup of tea, I posted the video my niece posted about her loss on my Facebook page with this message: “Asking for prayers. Knowing she recognizes that great wonderful gifts can come from unthinkable losses. Years ago she lost a beloved horse and her home schooling classroom in a barn fire. Out of those ashes a youth ranch was born. This devastation can also birth breathtaking beauty. Prayers for her and all involved as our human emotions can be sooooooo challenging.”

    All of this is totally intimately related to how I came to be ordained a Minister of Reunion and the message I plan to share about the way forward….

  • Cleveland Clinic

    They were in the midst of a Michigan blizzard and he was out trying to clear their driveway when a neighbor stopped to ask how his wife was doing. Although she worked for a medical doctor, a diagnosis had eluded them. “Not good,” was the reply.

    They talked a bit about what was going on with her, and later that night the neighbor, a chiropractor, called saying he thought he had identified what she had. “She needs to get somewhere and have a lung biopsy immediately,” he asserted.

    She notified her doctor, and because of the extreme winter weather they could not get her to Northwestern Memorial Hospital in Chicago. They could not get her to University of Michigan Hospital in Ann Arbor, Michigan. In the snowy situation she could only be airlifted to Cleveland Clinic in Ohio.

    Granulomatosis with polyangiitis (GPA), formerly known as Wegener’s granulomatosis, is a rare autoimmune disorder that causes inflammation of small- and medium-sized blood vessels (vasculitis). It restricts blood flow and forms inflamed, swollen tissue masses called granulomas, primarily affecting the upper and lower respiratory tracts (sinuses, nose, lungs) and kidneys.

    Sure enough, she was diagnosed with GPA! And even more sure enough, they had experienced a divine blizzard because the world’s foremost expert in Wegener’s granulomatosis at that time was at Cleveland Clinic….