Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: spirit

  • Atlanta Angel

    Sacred Stories

    She had been out of state visiting her son and daughter-in-law and her new grandson.

    Choosing to spare them having to drag the baby across town to escort her, she assured them she was capable of catching a bus and getting herself to the airport.

    She set out. However, her confidence soon wavered. Since her husband had died, she often felt without support. This was one of those times.

    A man, missing his front teeth, was seated at the bus stop when she arrived there. She said she was going to the airport. He assured her she was in the right place for the bus to the airport. So, she waited….

    Almost an hour had passed, and when no bus arrived at the scheduled time, the man jumped up and told her to come with him. “They just don’t run on time. We’ll have to get you to the subway station or you will miss your flight!”

    She felt some hesitation, but in the desire to make her flight, she followed quickly.

    When they got to the subway station, he insisted on going down into the station with her. “That is not necessary. I don’t want you to have to spend a token,” she protested.

    He said he did not have to pay extra. “I have a pass. I want to make sure you make it on to the right subway train!”

    She boarded the train, and as it pulled away, he put his hands together and bowed his head.

    Once again, she had been given assurance that we are always being watched over and cared for….

  • Divine Design

    Sacred Stories

    She had been doing some volunteer work with the local hospice organization. Although her involvement had not been ‘active’ in the recent past, the hospice person stayed in touch some via text.

    When she received a text message asking if this was a good time for her to provide some additional assistance, she had to decline, saying that her husband had recently been hospitalized. His care at home was demanding at lot of her right now.

    The hospice person wrote back asking, “Is there anything I can do to support you?”

    What had begun as a request for her to give support, suddenly unfolded into an opportunity for her to receive support.

    “I have been wondering if my husband could receive additional help managing his pain by going onto hospice care. It is increasingly difficult to get him to the doctor, too. I have been too overwhelmed to even make the call.” She spoke honestly.

    Within less than 24 hours the hospice person had put things into motion with absolute resolution. By the end of the night her husband had been accepted on hospice care!

    “I can see it all as such evidence that God is working all things together for good,” she said.

    Like the individual shards of glass in a kaleidoscope, all the people and happenings in our lives are moment-to-moment perfection being revealed. Life is more beautiful with the ups and downs. Each circumstance in our life is being expressed in Divine Design….

    Thank you for noticing this evidence and beauty in your own circumstances. Please share with others. These are sacred stories.

  • Are You Afraid?

    This past Saturday night our daughter Stacey and her husband hosted a Bon Voyage-Slushy Party. Approximately 75 friends and family feasted on Doug’s pulled pork, beef brisket, and homemade Granny’s BBQ sauce.

    Here is the crew starting to pull the pork:

    Here is the morning after in the back yard, with barely any evidence of the partying that happened the night before:

    Doug’s smoker has been sold, and regular readers of this blog know Stacey and Doug are about to pull up anchor and go on an adventure.

    One question was asked of me sooooooo many times over the evening. “Are you afraid?” If I were the one going on this trip, I would be afraid. I am not afraid for Stacey or Doug.

    The following is scheduled to be published in our local paper on Saturday, but many more readers have access to this blog so I am sharing it early.

    Living Your Dreams

    On October 3, 2019, our daughter, Stacey, turns 53 years old.

    Four days later, she and her husband, Doug, are scheduled to be dropped off at a marina in Paris Landing, Kentucky. They plan to motor their 34-foot sailboat down to the Gulf of Mexico, sail across the Gulf of Mexico, sail around the Florida Keys, and then sail on to the British Virgin Islands where they will live on the boat for the next year or more.

    They have spent over three years totally reconditioning the boat. This past April, they renamed her Lady Gail after our son-in-law’s mother. Our daughter never met her, but Gail lives on in Doug’s dream.

    On October 7, 1919—exactly 100 years to the day before their planned departure date—Stacey’s paternal grandfather was born. Doug never met him, but Grandpa B too lives on in their dream.

    During the ceremony to rename the boat, our grandson, Brad, and my husband, John, played guitar and sang along with our granddaughter, Courtney. The song, “Save Some Time to Dream,” by John Mellencamp, was a surprise.

    The message of the song is powerful. Could it be that this is all there is? Could it be there’s nothing more at all? Save some time to dream. ‘Cause your dream could save us all.

    Stacey cried. So did I.

    A few years ago, Doug was diagnosed with atrial fibrillation (also called AFib or AF), a quivering or irregular heartbeat (arrhythmia) that can lead to blood clots, stroke, heart failure, and other heart-related complications. At least 2.7 million Americans are living with AFib.

    This sailing adventure is major. It was scheduled for last year, but Doug ended up needing a major surgical procedure on his heart. Two cardiovascular surgeons worked simultaneously to perform an inside-outside cardiac ablation. We are so grateful it was totally successful!

    So many people give up on their dreams.

    A handwritten note with a quotation from Traveling with Pomegranates: A Mother and Daughter Journey, by New York Times bestselling author, Sue Monk Kidd, and her daughter, Ann Kidd Taylor, hangs on the side of my computer: “This is a really good idea. Before you dismiss it, remember how you felt when it came to you.”

    Someone told Stacey she must really love sailing to do this. Stacey said, “Not really, but Doug really loves sailing, and I really love Doug.”

    A plaque with the words of Mark Twain hangs in Lady Gail’s galley: Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do, so throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

    Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, inspirational writer and teacher, said, “Don’t die with your music still in you.”

    Stacey and Doug’s living their dream encourages us all to live our dreams. During the time they are gone, I expect I will journal more about my experience of their being gone. It is so very tender.

    Doug’s father lost a toe, a foot, and a leg last year—the result of a cut cuticle in a pedicure that could not heal due to diabetes.

    This year, Stacey’s dad is working through some health stuff.

    None of us are spring chickens. But we are all so proud of them.

    So many people give up on their dreams.

    Jana Stanfield sings:
    What would I do if I knew that I could not fail
    If I believed would the wind always fill up my sail
    How far would I go, what could I achieve /Trusting the hero in me
    If I were brave I’d walk the razor’s edge
    Where fools and dreamers dare to tread
    Never lose faith, even when losing my way
    What step would I take today if I were brave
    What would I do today if I were brave
    What if we’re all meant to do what we secretly dream
    What would you ask if you knew you could have anything
    Like the mighty oak sleeps in the heart of a seed
    Are there miracles in you and me
    If I refuse to listen to the voice of fear
    Would the voice of courage whisper in my ear
    What would I do today if I were brave

    In “Save Some Time to Dream” Mellencamp cautions not to let your time slip away. A man we met in Florida told us how wise Stacey and Doug are to do go on this trip now while they are young and strong enough. This friend had intended to take a very similar voyage to the one Stacey and Doug have planned. He waited until after he retired, but then his health prevented him from being able to sail. This past year, he sold his boat.

    Stacey and Doug anticipate having to go back to work after this trip. And even if their time away might delay formal retirement, living their dream is worth it.

    If you can refuse to listen to the voice of fear, what dream still lives in your heart?

    Could it be that this is all there is? Could it be there’s nothing more at all? Save some time to dream. ‘Cause your dream could save us all.


  • Flowers of Love

    Sacred Stories

    She arranged to have a dear friend create the floral arrangements for the church altar in honor of their wedding anniversary.

    On the way home from church, they gave one bouquet to her late friend’s daughter. The daughter was from out-of-state, supporting her father with hospice care there in his own home. The daughter had been sick, worn out, recovering, and in the thick of compassion fatigue. She cried when she saw the beautiful bouquet and felt the thoughtfulness.

    The other bouquet went to a neighbor whose husband had passed just six weeks prior — and it just happened to be their 48th anniversary!

    Clearly the gifts of these ‘Flowers of Love’ were divinely guided as well as lovingly created.

    Be alert to the subtle guidance you receive. Share the way Sacred Stories are alive in your life.

  • Timing is Everything

    Sacred Stories

    His choice was to donate his body to science.

    After he passed, his grand daughter was surprised to see he had done the necessary paperwork exactly one year ago!

    Timing is Everything

    When the stars line up
    And you catch a break
    People think you’re lucky
    But you know its grace
    It can happen so fast
    Or a little bit late
    Timing is everything

    Songwriters: Natalie Nicole Hemby / Troy Jones
    Timing Is Everything lyrics © Tiltawhirl Music, Crozier Music

  • Dancing in the Darkness

    Aaron Daily Quote
    Everybody wants to be safe and comfortable.
    For most of you, your habitual pattern around being safe and comfortable
    is to move into a control mode.
    And so you try to think it out and plan it out
    and get it perfect
    and then rehash the plans
    and see if they can be better.
    You don’t know how to let go.
    You can’t let go because you cannot yet recognize,
    ‘This controlling voice is simply fear.’
    But it is recognizable if you pay attention.
    As soon as there’s a contraction
    and the mind starts spinning out the plans,
    please just note, ‘Ah, fear is here.’

    During this second year of our Path of Clear Light study group, we are working with sacred darkness. Think terms, ‘dark night of the soul’ or ‘shadow’ work.

    Aaron opened with a couple of extended guided meditations. The first was a narrow bridge over a raging water fall below. We were in a harness but when we got to the middle of the bridge our direction was to allow ourselves to fall! The belief is/was that the harness would catch us, keeping us safe, ultimately preventing us from falling to our death. Fear was so present for this one who does not swim.

    The second scenario is/was sleeping in a cave in the pitch black. We were to spend some time each day in these metaphors, allowing ourselves to feel the fear.

    At the conclusion of the talk, when Aaron opened for questions, I shared that I love sleeping in darkness. I put a pair of socks over the little blue light on the cable box when I go to bed at night. I asked if that metaphor work for me if I was not afraid of the dark.

    One of the other students sent me a private message on the Zoom format, “There is mold in the cave.”

    How brilliant! We are always closer to those habit patterns of fear than we notice.

    In my journal I wrote that I was aware of fear around the mold remediation insurance claim having been paid at more than the actual remediation cost. I had reached out to the adjuster about that, but it was not resolved. What is/was that fear? I know I don’t have to be fearful about not being able to pay it back if I had to.

    I was able to see that it had to do with feeling out of integrity with the vow to not take what is not freely given.

    Fear:
    I am bad
    I will be punished
    I will lose face

    I have a flash of a past life in which I was shunned. We were a dark-skinned people.

    I see the fear that I could be fined, or that our coverage could be cancelled.

    I see how vulnerable that habit energy makes me feel. I recall the 8 worldly dharmas (also called concerns or preoccupations): pleasure and pain; gain and loss; praise and blame; fame and ill repute. Oh, my….

    Journal entry:
    V: You are aware of your habit pattern of wanting to be right. How might that have fueled your fear?
    D: Well, certainly right or wrong (duality) pulls a heavy weight. Notice what the odds are that you will be wrong if there is only one right answer/choice/conclusion. EVERYTHING ELSE IS WRONG.
    V: Doesn’t seem likely in something as unfathomably enormous as life, does it….
    D: So if it is not a matter of right or wrong, how do I best think about it?
    V: You know about wholesome and unwholesome. You know about skillful and unskillful. What do you think those mean?
    D: These seem to be part of clarity, wisdom, and kindness; taking into account all needs/desires/outcomes.
    V: Exactly. You are certainly seeing now how much highest purpose plays a role. If your highest purpose is to love/peace/clarity, many options open up. It isn’t about not having mundane purposes as well. In those times of inner conflict or just not being totally sure, you can rest easily within your highest purpose.
    D: We are all connected. Love is the glue!

    What a beautiful reminder that we are all dancing in the darkness.

    P.S. Updating you on the previous post’s plumbing predicament, more mold was found! A second leak occurred (a chain-reaction to the first break) and in the need to get the belly of the mobile home dried out, PuroClean found a 4×4 board covered with black mold. That was able to be removed. We are so grateful for the miraculous mayhem. The results truly are in the hands of the divine!

  • August 10

    Sacred Stories

    He had for years lived in what had been his mother’s home. The time had come for him to sell it and move nearer his daughter. He had received an offer on the home a week or so earlier, pending inspection and financing.

    Early one morning he was at the laundromat doing his laundry. Usually he was the only patron there, with just the attendant. This day, a couple was also there. He overheard their conversation—about their having put an offer on a house. He thought they were describing his home.

    Approaching the group, he asked about the location of the home they had put the offer on, and then exclaimed, “You are buying my home!”

    What a small world….

    Later that day he located the deed and noticed the couple had put their offer on the home on August 10, the exact date his mother had purchased the home years earlier.

    Share your sacred stories so we can all be more aware of the invisible threads that connect everything.

  • Dad’s Love in an Apple

    Sacred Stories

    She had been thinking about her dad a lot lately, especially that morning.

    As she stood there in the kitchen and took a bite of her apple, she realized her bite made a heart shape in the flesh.

    This was an apple her Dad would have picked up from the apple farm on his way home from work. It was small, and just the right amount of sweet.

    She was so happy that she took a moment, for whatever reason, to pull back and see her Dad’s love in an apple.

    Be alert to those simple reminders…. Love is all around us!

  • Free Lunch

    Sacred Stories

    A couple weeks after her husband’s passing, he received a big postcard inviting him to a free lunch, along with a guest, at one of their favorite restaurants.

    The only obligation was to listen to their presentation on cremation.

    Her girlfriend said he would want her to go, but tell them they just missed him!

  • In the Hands of the Divine

    Years ago I worked in a department store that had a pretty large jewelry section. Every time there was a chain with knots (and there were always chains with knots) I was the one who was given the job of de-tangling. I became really good at it.

    I am doing that right now as I am looking at the threads of events that have brought me here now.

    Many more threads were raveling before the one on which I was riding my bike and noticed a garage sale with a double sink. I rode right on by. I did not need a double sink.

    The following day the sink was by the side of the road with a sign on it: FREE.

    The sign said it was a great sink, that they had just remodeled.

    I rode my bike home and then drove my van back to get the sink. I thought it might be able to be cut in half. If not, I would just take it to our local Habit for Humanity ReStore where they sell donated home goods and use the funds to finance home builds.

    The good news is the sink was able to be cut in half, and my neighbor said he wanted the other half. Woohoo!

    So during the installation process, the removal of the old countertop and sink resulted in a snapped hose fitting, and a cracked water pipe under our mobile home. Not only did the bathroom floor get flooded, but the underneath of our mobile home is wet now too.

    Have you been following my summer of mold????

    My center of peace was shut as quickly and as tight as our water main….

    I grabbed the only deck of cards handy on the counter in my office. Osho Transformational Tarot. The card I drew was #53-Play.

    Play??? You’ve got to be kidding. How could that fit?

    When I got to this line, my pulse began to slow. “The result of your activity is in the hands of the Divine, you simply do.”

    Mind you, this is all unfolding right at this moment as my fingers are on the keyboard generating this post.

    I thought the mold remediation mayhem had all been taken in stride, but the residual fear flared sky high with this plumbing predicament.

    But the context of these words of advice in the Osho Tarot was unique: war.

    War is the most serious affair. You cannot be playful about it, because lives are involved, millions of lives are involved—you cannot be playful.

    And Krishna insists that even there you have to be playful.

    You don’t think about what will happen in the end, you just be here and now. You just be a warrior, playing.

    Don’t get worried about the result because the result is in the hands of the Divine.

    And it is not even the point if the result is in the hands of the Divine or not—the point is that it should not be in your hands, you should not carry it. If you carry it then your life cannot become meditative.

    I think I am going to make this my new mantra…. the result is in the hands of the Divine.