Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: scs-matters.com

  • Our “Tardiff”

    Sacred Stories

    She was sending a photo to a friend when the auto correct change “our yard” to our “Tardiff.” which just happens to be the last name of friends. He had passed away over ten years ago, and she had not seen his wife in quite a while.

    She took a screen shot, and sent it to Mrs. Tardiff.



    Mrs. Tardiff quickly wrote back:

      Interesting! Today I signed the papers for transfer of Title of the land (BOMARSH – wild Flowers) to our Amish next door neighbor. He has been taking care of the field for the last 12 years. I allow him to hunt on it. Now he is allowing my son to continue to hunt on it.

      It was what Bob wanted. If our neighbor didn’t want the land it was to be given to the land conservatives (but then no one could hunt on it). Bob didn’t want a McMansion built there.

      Sad, but happy day for me. The timing is a sign to me that it’s OK to move forward.

      Thanks, I really needed confirmation!

  • Ambiguous Moth

    Sacred Stories

    “Do you know what kind of moth this is?” she asked, texting a photo to her sister.

    Within moments her sister had sent an identification link to the Ambiguous Moth.

    These moths had been coming into their master bedroom every night — entering from the former screen porch that was being transformed into her husband’s art studio.

    Her husband spent the next day filling in all the entry gaps, and the following morning they were thrilled to wake to a bedroom free of their ambiguous friends.

    Coming in after a few minutes outside this was on his back:

    Moth medicine meaning: Moth medicine’s meaning is resurrection and transformation. A moth represents tremendous change, but it also seeks the light. Thus, moth spiritual meaning is to trust the changes that are happening and that freedom and liberation are around the corner.

    Perhaps not so ambiguous after all….

  • Transformation

    Recently, I included some information about transformation from J. Krishnamurti in my clergy “Insight’s” article.

    Transformation is said to occur only when NONE of the following are present:

      desire to change the experience
      judgment
      analysis
      justification
      grasping
      selfing
      resisting
      believing that “I am witnessing”

    Since the coronavirus stay-safe-at-home order in March, I have done daily yoga with Kathy Zerler. We started out by phone, but when it became obvious that the YMCA could not safely and legally hold the classes onsite any time soon, we started recording her yoga classes using Zoom. Kathy’s videos are available on Youtube by putting “Kathy Zerler yoga” into your search engine.

    This morning I had a heart-felt experience of transformation — exactly as Krishnamurti describes it — during the guided meditation at the end of class. “Your World is Your Greatest Creation” was published in Kathy’s Joyful Meditaions:

    Imagine yourself on a solitary beach at sunset. You are very relaxed after a long day…

    You come upon a raft that is half on the beach and half in the water. Your name is written on a flag that waves from a mast in the center of the raft. You understand that this raft is yours to use for as long as you need it. You decide to load up every person who has ever hurt you. Politely, you help each person onto the raft. When they are all seated, you toss in the baggage they have heaped on you along with a few things of your own that you no longer need. You push the raft out toward the setting sun and watch as these people and their baggage float out of your life.

    You are allowed to let them go. Just let them go….

    I have heard Kathy do this guided meditation several times before, but something truly remarkable happened today when the only person that got into the raft was me!

    I was alone in the raft and I could see clearly that only my distorted thoughts, beliefs, attitudes had hurt me.

    I gently oared the raft toward the setting sun in perfect peace.

    Transformation….

  • To Open or Not to Open

    Acceptance is the goal —
    acceptance and freedom to choose what we want and need to do
    to take care of ourselves with that person.

    We can become free of the patterns of the past.

    We are recovering.

    Progress is the goal.

    ~ The Language of Letting Go,
    Daily Meditations on Codependency
    by Melody Beattie

    Last evening I received an email message from our local YMCA with a subject line: Action Needed! Ask state lawmakers to reopen your Y!

    This morning in an online news article Dr. Fauci warns of “early signs” that an outbreak could be brewing in Tennessee, Kentucky, Ohio and Indiana. Right now, 93%, or 89 of Tennessee’s 95 counties, have a transmission rate “above the threshold.”

    Related to the coronavirus, most everyone would agree that progress is the goal. Obviously, however, opinions differ regarding in which direction progress lays.

    A friend heard on the news this morning that risk of exposure in our area is currently 4%. Her comment was that the low percentage may give people the feeling that not complying with guidelines (primarily wearing masks and maintaining safe distancing) is safe.

    I said, “If you want to untangle a knotted string, it is crucial to know which end of the string you are holding.”

    Four percent is a direct result of the strict guidelines that have been in place. The number does not mean, “Oh, we don’t have much Covid, so lets throw a big party to celebrate.” Rather, what it really means is, “Thankfully, our actions are making a difference, and lives are being saved. We can get through this together.”

    I took two photos this morning. One is a stink bug on my kitchen window; the other a moth on my office window.


    Seeing the delicate moth generated an inner smile; the big fat stink bug, repulsion.

    I understand businesses wanting to reopen, but is reopening an indoor exercise facility wise? Is sending out an email message urging members to pressure lawmakers to allow them to reopen a responsible act?

    This morning as I notice my inner preferences, I open email to the quotation from Abraham Hicks:

    If you will simply imagine your life as you want it to be, all cooperative components will be summoned. And even more important, all components that are summoned will cooperate. It is Law. The experience that you have with others is about what you evoke from them.

    Excerpted from The Vortex on 8/31/09

    Our Love,
    Esther
    (and Abraham and Jerry)

    I imagine Tennessee learning from Florida. I imagine Y members writing to the Y expressing the willingness to be patient. I imagine the stinky and the delicate co-existing in the balance of nature. I imagine acceptance and freedom to choose what we want and need to do to take care of ourselves…. I imagine all beings coming to the end of suffering.

  • Queen Stinky

    For this is wisdom; to live,
    To take what fate, or the Gods, may give.
    ~ Laurence Hope

    Wouldn’t it be great to have the name Hope! Or Faith! Cope is the maiden name of a friend. My own name (Debra) means busy bee in colloquialism, and she who brings the sublime light of the creator in the Egyptian cartouche.

    “We can’t control the events of our lives…” was the next line in the daily reading that opened with the quotation by Laurence Hope.

    This was also the theme of Tuesday’s meditation group with Sheilana Massey, who asked us to reflect on whether we are living our life, or letting our life live us. She asked, “When things are not going our way, are we trying to make it do that?”

    Someone shared a Quaker Saying, “The way will open related to that.”

    I asked, “Do we have to make something wrong in order to learn?”

    A woman mentioned how scientists and mathematicians are now coming to the same conclusions about the world spiritualists have long held.

    I have been dancing with demons expressing as insecurity around lack of formal education, comparing my poetry writing to others, and feeling not good enough. Familiar stories….

    Last evening just about dusk we had a surprise visitor at our bird feeder.

    Reading in Animal-Speak, by Ted Andrews:

    Skunk teaches how to give respect, expect respect, and demand respect.

    It is self-assured and confident in itself.

    If skunk has shown up, it can help you with this particular aspect.

    (p. 312-313)

    Yes, I have been dancing with demons but I have come to value the dancing as exercise — not in futility, but fertility.

    This particular skunk is absolutely gorgeous. I have never seen one so white or so fluffy. My sister, Janis, named this one Queen Stinky. I like that name very much….

  • Swarm of Dragonflies!

    Sacred Stories

    This wonderful sacred story is shared by a friend. Her mom passed recently. Here are her own words describing the experience:

    I went to the home of my mom’s best friend for a visit on Sunday. She began by telling me that every time she and my mom got together they would exchange some little token or gift with each other. So she was going to do that with me now.

    She gave me a choice of three charms; one was a dragon fly.

    I told her the story of when I was little. A huge swarm of dragonflies came to our yard (in a very densely populated city). Hundreds of them — swarming and twirling around the yard!

    My mom stood with me so we could watch and I wouldn’t be scared.

    So I picked the dragonfly charm.

    An hour after I left, a whole swarm of dragonflies were outside my mom’s best friend’s house — unlike anything she has ever seen!

    A neat visit from my mom ❤️

  • Page 166

    Sacred Stories

    I walked out of my office, having just posted a Sacred Story titled: Like Talking to Your Dad Again!. He had passed 49 days ago, and his daughter was having a sense of his presence.

    My husband was sitting at the dining table reading a book about the history of our area.


    He asked what I was doing, and I mentioned having just posted the sacred story about our friend.

    “I am looking at a photo of him right now,” her husband said, pointing to a page in the book.

    I immediately sent a text message to his daughter. “I just came out of my office having published your sacred story and here is a picture of your dad on the page of a book my husband is reading.” I sent her a copy of the cover of the book, and the photo of her dad. “Your dad’s photo is on page 166!”

    “That is….I don’t know what word describes it!” she texted back.

    “Now your dad is just showing off,” I responded.

    “He always did have a flair for the dramatic,” she shot back.

    Be mindful of your experiences so you can recognize and share your sacred stories. They lift us all up….

  • My Longings

    “Strive to be uncynical,
    to be a hope-giving force,
    to be a steward of substance.”
    ~ Maria Popova
    Bulgarian-born, American-based writer

    Last evening as we finished dominoes via Zoom, I asked what the most significant news of the day was. My friend said probably that the Trump administration ordered hospitals to bypass the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and send all COVID-19 patient information to a central database in Washington, meaning that the CDC was no longer going to have access to the real-time data about the coronavirus.

    I had a heavy sensation low in my gut.

    I drew the 5 of Clouds, Comparison, from the Osho deck before I went to bed. I sent the message to my friend. “Just look around. All is needed, and everything fits together. It is an organic unity; nobody is higher and nobody is lower, nobody superior, nobody inferior. Everybody is incomparably unique.” I slept rather fitfully.

    When I woke this morning, I knew I was dreaming again, but these images like the past several dreams of children needing support are gone before my feet hit the floor.

    My mind is very clear, however, about the “Say Only” story of the importance of reserving judgment as things are unfolding. I first read this story in The Eye of the Storm by Max Lucado. I have since learned that it predates Lucado and Christianity, and is still true….

    Perhaps President Trump will be able to report data so that those who have discounted the gravity of the virus and been defiant about protective measures will be able to tolerate (hear) the truth from someone they trust.

    I must begin by calling forth my own trust and calling forth his higher guidance.

    I looked back over several recent Daily Quotes from Aaron:

    July 8, 2020
    When enough of you are ready to hold the real vision of a world at peace, where beings do not manipulate, steal, kill or otherwise harm each other, the capacity to hold that vision will emerge in world leaders. You will call them forth. They do not lead you so much as you invite them! The effective leader can only walk where some are ready to follow.

    July 13, 2020
    Bring into your heart and mind the president of this country and others who help to guide him as he makes his decisions. He has a difficult job. You may not agree with his decisions. But certainly you will agree that in his deepest heart, he hopes that his choices for this country will bring peace in the long run if not sooner. This is a man under enormous pressure and he needs your loving wishes even if you say no to his choices. ‘As you strive to guide this nation, may your heart remain open to love and as free as is possible from fear. May you be happy and find peace.’

    July 14, 2020
    You are ready to take this step, ready not only to be awakened but to help the whole Earth awaken, each of you in your own way. I’m not suggesting you’re all going to be like the Buddha, with his path. Your way of awakening the Earth may simply to be to plant an enlightened garden, a garden of plants that you co-create rather than order around. How do we co-create with the Earth? How do we co-create with each other? How do we use our power and unlimitedness in ways that do no harm?

    July 15, 2020
    You as a world are inviting conflict but then not doing the needed practice with it, so you must invite it again and again. You are like the child in school doing endless multiplication table drills; they are unpleasant but you have not studied the tables, and will not, so the teacher repeats the drills. Your inattention calls forth the repetition. If you wish the drills to cease, learn the tables.

    Aaron’s daily quotes are not selected. The quotes were placed into an archive, and each day one is randomly generated. Some quotes may have never been published, some pop up with regularity, and I have seen some publish two days in a row. Aaron himself established this random generation as a condition when the Daily Quotes began to be shared.

    The impact of the coronavirus, and the divisiveness of of sisters and brothers is unpleasant. Wish the drills to cease; learn the tables.

    Sue Monk Kidd’s novel, The Book of Longings, is a mesmerizing work of fiction. Ana—a rebellious and gifted young woman of Galilee, meets and marries Jesus. Before their meeting, early in the book, we witness Ana in a clandestine rooftop meeting with her aunt, Yaltha, another unusual woman of the time.

    “Do you know what an incantation bowl is?” Yaltha asks Ana. “In Alexandria we women pray with them. We write our most secret prayer inside them. Like this.”

    Yaltha places a finger inside the bowl and moves it in a spiraling line around the sides of the bowl. “Every day we sing the prayer. As we do, we turn the bowl in slow circles and the words wriggle to life and spin off toward heaven.”

    My most secret prayer has been written into my “incantation bowl” and I will sing this prayer every day: May all beings be happy and find peace; may we awaken wisdom mind; filling the universe with love; joy; kindness; and compassion.

  • Like Talking to Your Dad Again!

    Sacred Stories

    Her dad had passed six weeks ago. She was living with her mom.

    Her mom’s college roommate and husband had recently come for a visit and helped with a bunch of house projects. Afterward, she and the husband spent a few hours just talking. They really enjoyed an in-depth conversation.

    He said he had loved that kind of conversations with her dad, and was hoping he might be able to share that way with her too.

    Several times during their conversation he remarked how her speech and behavioral mannerisms were just like her dad’s.

    “It is like I am talking to your dad again….” he told her.

    Rather than a sense of emptiness, she also feels her dad’s presence at the house. She says it is comforting, adding,”I very much believe there is more to this world than we can experience intellectually.”

  • Overcast

    Overcast

    It is overcast today
    Four months since I
    freely hugged
    or leaned over the
    puzzle table
    saying, “Where do you think
    this piece goes?”
    to my companion

    In search of where each piece fits
    Longing for the satisfaction
    completion brings

    The sun is up there
    Still shining
    but my world feels grey today

    I still embrace those I love
    In my hands I cradle
    sweet faces
    in my heart
    even though it is overcast today

    I wonder how you got where you are, here by the edge of the concrete, where you bloom.

    I also wonder how I got where I am.

    It occurs to me that I might be a volunteer like this precious petunia. The conditions are right for our growth. Mine and this purple pretty.

    As a writer, I have never been afraid I would have nothing to say. Never has the empty page intimidated me. The space is invitation. The movement of my fingers on the keyboard itself an inspiration. I watch letters appear as if by magic, having left my discursive mind at the door.

    This is a time like none other. What I have to say seems to have been said better by others.

    I witness this blankness on the page as evidence of the void my heart feels. Not once in his thirty years have I gone this long without being with my him. My first grandchild. My grandson. I remember well his words, “When I am not in my house, and you are not in your house, I am going to miss you.”

    He was two.

    We have met half-way, in Colombus, Indiana, for the weekend. We are staying in a suite at the Holiday Inn. His grandpa and I sleeping in one room and his mom and he sleeping in the other.

    We two are the only ones awake. The small round table and the two chairs where we are seated as he moves the cheerios around in his bowl bear witness to our soft voices as he verbalizes our one heart.

    He points to our separate rooms as he speaks. He has a good sense of what is to come. He knows his grandpa and I will go back to Michigan and he will go with his mom back to Tennessee.

    He knows we will long for one another.

    He knows his mom will wait until he is asleep before she heads south as his grandpa and I head north. Otherwise he would cry and nothing would console him.

    I now gather these memories in the tendrils of my current longing — my longing to hold so much and so many.

    It is overcast today.

    I allow my mind’s eye to blink away the tears until I can see far enough into our future to touch his flesh, smell his breath, and feel the roar of relief.

    We must be gentle with ourselves as we navigate the waters of our emotions.