Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: Recovering Hero Proclamation

  • Take Another Look

    Below is a Yellow Brick Road from October 28, 2020. The theme is floating back through my consciousness and might be helpful for others at this time again as well.


    Need to Do

    You must cherish one another.
    You must work —
    we all must work —
    to make this world
    worthy of its children.

    ~ Pablo Casals

    Is this opening quotation, as it is written, true? Less and less I am concerned with being a doer, as more and more I am aware of the importance of how I am being. Listening to Rupert Spira speak about there being no doer, however, I also recognize the stages of learning we are experiencing around all of this. Spira says the belief and feeling “I am a person” is the same belief and feeling of “I am a doer.”

    In mindfulness, this thought “I am a person” could be seen as operating from ego.

    New Years Eve 2000 — twenty years ago — our meditation focus was a powerful writing titled “The Recovering Hero Proclamation.” Here is the last stanza:

    I allow things to unfold naturally, and I trust the flow.
    I joyfully accept and experience my humanity.
    I need nothing.
    All already is.
    Blessed be.

    ~Aaliyah LivingWell
    aka Gina Dawn Gavaris
    GeneratingLove@aol.com
    www.GeneratingSolutions.org

    It is important to realize that this does not mean all action ceases. As Spira says, “No…. Cars continue to be driven, meals continue to be cooked, inquiring into the nature of experience continues to be undertaken.” Everything continues, but it doesn’t imply that there’s a doer.

    I found this note in my journal: I forgive myself for believing it is my job to be the hero in any situation or save anyone else from having the experience they are creating.

    Wow.

    Those familiar with the SCS/NLP materials recognize fully we are moving off the Drama Triangle and experiencing life from the transrational perspective.

    If we are able to drive, cook, and inquire into the nature of things without identifying ourselves as a doer, notice how much more can be done through the expanded awareness.

    Recently a friend who hosts two of the Florida Zoom groups I participate in sent a message saying she has reached her stress limit and is going off the grid. We are still able to use her Zoom account, but she is not meeting with us.

    William Wordsworth’s opening line in, “The World Is Too Much With Us”: The world is too much with us; late and soon.

    Spira invites us to imagine a pink elephant under the chair. Both the statement, “There is something for the pink elephant under the chair to do,” and the statement, “There is nothing for the pink elephant under the chair to do,” are equally absurd.

    Is there something we need to do? Today’s Daily Word:

      Guidance
      I am divinely guided from within.

      There are times I find myself wondering which way to turn. Rather than feeling stressed or pressured into making quick decisions, I know these instances are perfect opportunities to calm myself and check my internal compass for divine direction.

      The source guidance I receive allows me to perceive possible paths and shows me the way if I veer off course. All I need to do is become quiet and feel aware of my connection with God by pausing, breathing deeply, releasing, and relaxing into my intuitive knowing.

      From this place, I instinctively know which way to turn and what to do. In faith, I follow the guidance of my inner wisdom and know everything I will need for the journey ahead is already mine.

      Though we stumble, we shall not fall headlong, for the Lord holds us by the hand.—Psalm 37:24

    Of course we do things. Until the mind jumps in after the activity and claims, “I did this, I did that” there is only a sense of the raw experience. A baby probably does not draw from the mother’s breast and think, “I just ate.” The nourishment and the nurturing and the satiating of hunger are the raw experience. No commentary is necessary.

    Note* Is it significant that the “About Debra” page I am working on for launch of DebraBasham.com opens with a quotation that might appear to be in conflict with my own words?


    She wanted to be able to look back over her own life
    when she was much older and say,
    “Yes I did that.
    And that.
    And that, too.”
    ~ The Gazebo, a novel by Emily Grayson, (p. 288)


    John sings a duet of “When Did I Get Old” with his music friend, John Smith. The lyrics are by Derrick Clinton Dove & music is by Derrick Dove and The Peacekeepers. Don’t you love those names?

    As the two John’s sing, “When did I get old, when did everything change? I don’t recognize this world, I don’t remember this pain. Did time speed up or did I slow down? When did I get old, it’s all behind me now. When did I get old, it’s almost over now,” I realize today is a good day for me to take another look at this blog post. Likely it is related to the timing of my older sister nearing her transition. Of course, it is not only old people who transition and even when it’s over it’s not really over.

    Ah, there is time to take another look, and another look, and another look….

  • Need to Do

    You must cherish one another.
    You must work —
    we all must work —
    to make this world
    worthy of its children.

    ~ Pablo Casals

    Is this opening quotation, as it is written, true? Less and less I am concerned with being a doer, as more and more I am aware of the importance of how I am being. Listening to Rupert Spira speak about there being no doer, however, I also recognize the stages of learning we are experiencing around all of this. Spira says the belief and feeling “I am a person” is the same belief and feeling of “I am a doer.”

    In mindfulness, this thought “I am a person” could be seen as operating from ego.

    New Years Eve 2000 — twenty years ago — our meditation focus was a powerful writing titled “The Recovering Hero Proclamation.” Here is the last stanza:

      I allow things to unfold naturally, and I trust the flow.
      I joyfully accept and experience my humanity.
      I need nothing.
      All already is.
      Blessed be.

      ~Aaliyah LivingWell
      aka Gina Dawn Gavaris
      GeneratingLove@aol.com
      www.GeneratingSolutions.org

    It is important to realize that this does not mean all action ceases. As Spira says, “No…. Cars continue to be driven, meals continue to be cooked, inquiring into the nature of experience continues to be undertaken.” Everything continues, but it doesn’t imply that there’s a doer.

    I found this note in my journal: I forgive myself for believing it is my job to be the hero in any situation or save anyone else from having the experience they are creating.

    Wow.

    Those familiar with the SCS/NLP materials recognize fully we are moving off the Drama Triangle and experiencing life from the transrational perspective.

    If we are able to drive, cook, and inquire into the nature of things without identifying ourselves as a doer, notice how much more can be done through the expanded awareness.

    Recently a friend who hosts two of the Florida Zoom groups I participate in sent a message saying she has reached her stress limit and is going off the grid. We are still able to use her Zoom account, but she is not meeting with us.

    William Wordsworth’s opening line in, “The World Is Too Much With Us”: The world is too much with us; late and soon.

    Spira invites us to imagine a pink elephant under the chair. Both the statement, “There is something for the pink elephant under the chair to do,” and the statement, “There is nothing for the pink elephant under the chair to do,” are equally absurd.

    Is there something we need to do? Today’s Daily Word:

    Guidance
    I am divinely guided from within.

    There are times I find myself wondering which way to turn. Rather than feeling stressed or pressured into making quick decisions, I know these instances are perfect opportunities to calm myself and check my internal compass for divine direction.

    The source guidance I receive allows me to perceive possible paths and shows me the way if I veer off course. All I need to do is become quiet and feel aware of my connection with God by pausing, breathing deeply, releasing, and relaxing into my intuitive knowing.

    From this place, I instinctively know which way to turn and what to do. In faith, I follow the guidance of my inner wisdom and know everything I will need for the journey ahead is already mine.

    Though we stumble, we shall not fall headlong, for the Lord holds us by the hand.—Psalm 37:24

    Of course we do things. Until the mind jumps in after the activity and claims, “I did this, I did that” there is only a sense of the raw experience. A baby probably does not draw from the mother’s breast and think, “I just ate.” The nourishment and the nurturing and the satiating of hunger are the raw experience. No commentary is necessary.

  • For You First

    I am not sure who the spiritual teacher was that first told me whatever message you receive for another, realize the message is for you first. That message or lesson or truth also applies to the other, but it is for YOU. Perhaps it was something learned in Ryan Elliott’s L-O-N-G intake form for hypnotherapy. I do recall hearing it from Angel Gail Konz. This morning I had opportunity to remember it again!

    “Don’t we all want to be needed?” It was a rhetorical question via text. A follow-up to a our earlier conversation.

    “Maybe not,” I wrote back. I could instantly see it related to Sunday’s sermon coming up. I recall how clear I was that this week’s talk was to be new: I was not to give the one I had recently shared in another church. “Let’s talk after dinner,” I responded before sending her this:

    The Recovering Hero Proclamation

    I have no need to save others.
    I have no need to rescue others.
    I have no need to outshine anyone.
    I have no need to out-think, out-perform,
    out-produce anyone – including myself.
    I do not need to know anything.
    I do not need to be an expert.
    I do not need to fix anyone, or any change anything.
    I do not need to dazzle, impress, or inspire anyone.
    I do not need to be the hero of my own story.
    In truth, I am organic, evolving, and fallible.
    I allow things to unfold naturally, and I trust the flow.
    I joyfully accept and experience my humanity.
    I need nothing.
    All already is.
    Blessed be.

    ~Aaliyah LivingWell
    aka Gina Dawn Gavaris
    GeneratingLove@aol.com
    www.GeneratingSolutions.org

    I kept working on the sermon, adding this teaching from Aaron:

    A more wholesome attitude might be rather that an initial ego intention, ‘I’m going to save the world,’ we start with the loving intention to see how we can dance with others and with the Earth and with spirit to co-create deeper peace and well-being for all sentient beings. We invite ourselves to be open and listen, to be guided, rather than having the ego dictate, ‘No, it should be this way.’ When you do this you find there truly are no limitations.

    I looked again at the original writings on the Drama Triangle and added this to the sermon notes:

    In 1968 Stephen Karmpan wrote an article about the Drama Triangle. On this triangle are three interconnected roles: Victim, Rescuer, Persecutor.

    A Rescuer often gains great satisfaction by identifying with their care-taking role. They are generally proud of what “helpers” and “fixers” they are. Often they are socially acclaimed, even rewarded, for what can be seen as “selfless acts” of caring. They believe in their goodness as chief caretakers and see themselves as heroes.

    Behind it all is a magical belief that, said out loud, might sound like, “If I take care of them long enough, then, sooner or later, they will take care of me too.” But, as we’ve already learned, this rarely happens. When we rescue the needy, we can’t expect anything back. They can’t even take care of themselves – much less be there for us!

    This morning, an extended time in meditation allowed me to bring to mind the opening line I had keyed in for the sermon: People want to be helpful, to be useful. We have ways of being helpful and useful that are more wholesome than others.

    F!A$#

    Something clicked and I could see how hard I had been pushing her to experience something other than what she was experiencing. I had been doing the same thing I was trying to get her to stop doing.

    Forgive me, Dear One.

    When others seem to me to be in internal conflict or when conditions are difficult or “others” are caught in effort rather than trust, I am being lovingly invited to totally trust God in all of life. As I remember that grace moves through all of our days I am able to relax and breathe and let go.