I am suddenly feeling quite weary. My eyes are burning and I can barely stay awake. It is almost 11:00 pm, but I don’t think this is physical tired.

Something is pulling me inward. I am pondering.

My sister officially retired today. We have shared an office wall for many of the years she has worked as a massage therapist. In the past decade we have been together in three offices. After a session I could smell her essential oils when she would come out of her room on the way to the restroom to wash her hands. It smelled like love to me.

Today I told her I will miss seeing her between clients. She said, “But now you can see me for other stuff. I will have time and energy to do things.”

So what is this lump in my throat, this sense of sadness or loss?

Today I was reminded of the teaching: When the conditions are present emotions will arise.

I am saying goodbye to our relationship as colleagues.

I am so thankful we are not saying goodbye to our relationship as sisters.