Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: life after death

  • Marquette

    Her sister and brother-in-love had been planning a move from their hometown to the upper peninsula of Michigan, where their youngest grandchildren were. She wanted her sister to be where she needed to be, but to be honest, in her heart a move to Marquette for them felt like loss. Significant relief came when they had decided to stay in the area, but sell their current home and move into something else.

    “We just found a duplex to rent. It has a basement!” her sister’s text read. “What a story to tell. Call me when you can.”

    They were in the car driving to a jam session so she she called her sister right then.

    The duplex was on Marquette Woods Road, very near her! And close to everything…. She heard her brother-in-law say in the background, “We thought we were going to be moving to Marquette, and I guess in a way we are!”

    Directly across from her at the jam session was a musician wearing a hat with one word on it: Marquette.

    “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” ~ Jeremiah 29:11

  • Missing Ear Bud

    Finishing her meditation, she popped her wireless ear buds into the charger case, snapped the lid closed, and set it on the bedside table until she got up and plugged it into her computer. Late that evening as she was readying for bed, she put the charger case back on the bedside table so it would be ready for her meditation.

    The following morning the one for the right ear was missing!

    She searched on the bed, under the bed, under the bedside table…. but did not find it. Later that morning, she recruited the assistance of one of the friends she was visiting. They took the bed linens off, even removing the pillows from their cases. Her friend intoned: “Saint Anthony, Saint Anthony, please come around. Something is lost that needs to be found.”

    “What might the lesson or gift be?” her friend asked.

    “That I should only use the left ear bud?” she mused. The left ear is connected to the right brain, so that made some sense.

    The ear bud for the right ear remained missing. In their fastidious searching they did find a domino behind the bed side table. It was an eight and a six: 14. They looked up the spiritual meaning of 14 only to discover the same message they had been speaking about a few minutes earlier.

    The number 14 is associated with new starts, fresh opportunities, but also balance and harmony. Your angels could be using this number to encourage you to be more adaptable and not to let self-doubt hold you back. Divine forces are on your side and want you to thrive – so any risks will surely be rewarded in time.

    A bit later their other friend also searched for the missing ear bud without finding it. When her friend who had helped with the earlier search asked her exactly where was she and what was the exact sequence of her actions she hopped up on her bed and provided a play-by-play reenactment, including testing what might have happened if the case lid had not been closed tightly. She could not even shake the ear bud out of the case! Could the missing ear bud have not made it into the case?

    Her friend stretched out on the floor between the two beds. From that eye-level view, she saw what she thought was another shred of dryer sheet. She had picked one up in her previous search but as she ran her hand under the bed she came out with the missing ear bud!

    This information about processing our listening with only one ear comes from the internet: Depending on which ear you receive the input from, the information will be processed a bit differently, but the general structure will be the same, and obviously, the end result will be the same. Information from your right ear is initially processed by your left hemisphere, and information from your left ear is initially processed by your right hemisphere. The right side controls attention, memory, reasoning, and problem solving.

    She thanks the divine forces and says she will do her meditation without the missing ear bud for a while!

  • Trust Your Own Story

    Early Saturday morning I woke up dreaming. I knew the symbols were significant so by the light of the digital watch I keep on the nightstand I wrote in my journal:

      Dream

      Am sliding head-first down a piece of card stock to show a friend she can “trust your own story/writing….”

    My scribbled note was at the bottom of a page, so I flipped to the next sheet and crawled back into bed. At 8:38 am my cell phone rang in the great room. The call, from a Michigan State police trooper, had gone to voice mail before I got there, so I returned the call. The news was quite upsetting, and I apologize for needing to mention having gotten the call without sharing the details of the information in the call. My upset state of mind is what is most relevant, and that I forgot about having had the dream….

    I am grateful Stacey was available to talk with me about the call, and thankful we genuinely affirmed for one another the importance of taking things as they come. I calmed down enough to go out for a bike ride.

    Making a right turn off one road and onto another, there was a very attractive young woman (well-dressed) with a little white pug-faced dog on a leash in the yard. I didn’t think anything about it until I came around the corner and the dog ran to the end of the leash and W-H-O-O-S-H was off the leash and chasing me down the street!

    A car was driving toward us at a pretty fast clip and showed no sign of slowing down. The dog’s owner was running hard, desperately trying to catch the dog. I knew she was terrified the dog was going to run out in front of the car. I kept moving to stay between the dog and the car.

    I’ve been bitten by a dog, so I don’t have a lot of confidence when I am being chased. As the dog caught up to me I stopped peddling, began coasting, and raised my feet up so that the dog wouldn’t have access to my feet or legs. After the car passed and the owner yelled, “PLEASE STOP!” I stopped and she caught the dog.

    I was sooooooo aware of all of the aspects: I didn’t want to get bitten by the dog, I didn’t want the dog to cause me to fall of my bike onto the pavement, I didn’t want the dog to get hit by the car, I didn’t want the driver of the car to hit the dog…. Each of these aspects of things I didn’t want pointed to the vital truth: I truly wanted the best possible outcome for all.

    The owner and I apologized to one another. She did not realize I had kept riding to keep the bike between her dog and the car. We shared a few tears mingled with the stress and the relief. She kept saying she could not understand how the dog got off the lease; that had never happened. With shaking legs but a grateful heart, I rode on.

    All I wrote in my journal that morning was that I had gotten the call from the trooper with the upsetting news and “Dog got off leash and chased me.”

    Sunday morning I went for another easy ride. It was one of the most pleasant early morning rides in weeks because the temperature was mild and the wind was calm. After I got home I touched base with a dear Michigan friend, Linda Higbee, (another snow-bird) who just had back surgery here in Cape Coral. A headache had her still in the hospital, lying flat.

    She wrote: “The nursing assistant, Kristin, came up with getting me high protein ice cream. It’s sticks to the spoon and l can eat it lying down 😋 . I’ve been able to rest well and ask for some spirit help. Stepping back to see both the positive and negative happening is very introspective and kind of calming too.”

    The dream flashed into my mind! I could totally see how this had played out with my experience of having been chased by the dog. I wrote back to her, “All good news…. and I’m sharing that awe and calming of seeing both the positive and the negative (maybe it’s more accurate to say both the pleasant and the unpleasant) at the same time. I’ll write up and share my experience of having been chased by a dog on my bike today!”

    I hope you are able to see with me how my dream was a gift from Holy Spirit. The symbol was speaking to me about the phone call from the trooper AND speaking to my friend about her recuperation.

    An unpleasant experience does not have to be labeled as negative. As Morgan Harper Nichols is quoted by Gratefulness.org, “Peace is an invitation in daily life to breathe deep, right here, in the uncertainty.”

    You are able to “Trust Your Own Story,” right here, in the uncertainty.

  • I Am Made of You

      It is this disinterested but completely allowing contemplation of the body in the world that the body loses its ‘me-ness’ and the world loses its ‘not-me-ness.’ In this way bodily sensations no longer cry out ‘I am separate, I am exclusively you” and perceptions of the world no longer cry out, ‘I am separate, I am not you.’ Everything sings out, ‘I am made of you.’ ~ Rupert Spiria


    Is this a drawing of a duck or a rabbit?

    A catchy little trick from NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming) was to ask a client if he or she was sure enough to be unsure when that person could see conflicting points of view. This week it has come into clarity how vital it may be for each of us to move toward willingness to live in a state of asking that of ourselves: “Am I sure enough to be unsure?”

    The point is freedom from identification with any point of view; a full freedom from attachment to ALL points of view. This does not mean I won’t have a point of view. Of course we will. The shift comes as awareness reveals whatever the point of view, it is simply a point of view.

    Points of view can be very similar, somewhat similar, somewhat different, radically different, or even diabolically opposed. I think you will agree that way too often solidified points of view which are widely differing or diabolically opposed can become deadly. Literally….

    At the very least solidified points of view have an impact on rapport and can damage relationships, cause stress, and rob us of our natural state of harmony and happiness.

    Decades ago it was pretty easy for me to hold a firm intention to have freedom from a “negative” point of view, and to observe the changes within myself when I was free from that point of view. I could quite easily and notice when my Debbie Downer was in charge, and I could choose a better feeling thought. This was quite skillful at that time.

    The past several years I have been studying Sacred Darkness with a group of others who are also intentional about awareness with a capital “A.” What is sometimes called “pure” awareness is not a limited awareness of this or that, and it is not attached to a particular point of view. Even preferences of positive or negative are simply part of the continuum of The All That Is.

    For sure, I prefer feeling positively, but can you see that this preference is also aversion to feeling negatively? I remember so well letting something negative “go,” but continuing to hold the point of view that it was or is negative.

    Aaron’s Daily Reflection:

    Many of you were raised with this idea, “Hold it in the light and it will dissolve.” What do I do if it doesn’t dissolve? And of course, sometimes it doesn’t dissolve. If the conditions are present and have not yet been purified, then that condition will arise and will maintain itself until the conditions dissolve. If the conditions for body pain are still there, the pain will remain, no matter how much you try to love it. You do not love it to make it go away. You hold it in love — the body pain, the anger — because that spaciousness is what allows the conditions to dissolve. If you hold it in a kind of idea of love, saying, “I will love it. I will love it. Why is it still here? I’m loving it so hard! Why doesn’t it go?”, well, you’re just more and more contracting, more and more caught up in whatever has arisen, because you’re trying to smash it away.

    Rupert Spira is a teacher of non-dual awareness. He is the author of the opening quotation. His words are still a bit foreign to most humans when we try to use the finite mind to know or speak about the world. However, Spira’s work assures us, “It’s not possible to view the world directly from awareness’ perspective,” because, “There’s no room in the infinite for the finite.”

    Awareness needs the finite mind to know the world. The finite mind holds points of view.

    Every point of view is finite but love is infinite.

    Perhaps one way human beings are able to open to and enjoy the sweet fragrance of infinite love is by being sure enough to be unsure…. I am made of you.

  • Two Male Cardinals

    She and her husband did a ridge hike close to Tucson, Arizona while they were wintering in the Western United States from their home in Western Canada. Her husband doesn’t do heights very well, and he leaned over to one side for many hours as they tackled their big hike.

    Eventually, they got to their designation at 3 in the afternoon and found a picnic table to enjoy a very late lunch. Out of nowhere two red male Cardinals showed up and hung around very close by to them. They were thrilled and thought of it as a sacred gift.

    (photo credit Tammi Mild)

    Some time later, they had the good fortune to join a birding festival at Salton Sea in California. The person who kindly took them around to the various places was an avid birder and very knowledgeable.

    They somehow relayed their experience with their hike and the two male Cardinals. He looked at them a bit oddly before saying, “Cardinals are never seen in that area! That so I unusual….”

    Later she told her husband she thought it was so wonderful his angels, or God or whoever, chose to show such compassion to him and gift him with these bird sightings right beside them.

    They weren’t sure who might have shown up for her husband, but their own has joined so many other amazing stories about birds related to visits from departed loved ones.

  • Flowers from Friends

    After several years of leaving her own home and traveling to a nearby state to provide support — and then care — for her centenarian father, he had recently passed and now now she was executor of his estate.

    She writes: “I had just opened the day’s mail which brought a flood of medical bills and estate paperwork when the doorbell rang. What a delight to have this beautiful bouquet arrive in that moment from friends in Massachusetts! Life has its pleasant surprises, often perfectly timed.”

    Some friends play at friendship but a true friend sticks closer than one’s nearest kin. (Proverbs 18:24)

  • Snow Bird Sees Rare Bird

    It has possibly been the longest ever period between posts for the Yellow Brick Road…. and I cannot say what has kept my fingers off the keyboard, but this Snow Bird before doing anything else this morning has to write about having seen a rare bird.

    The significance of this bird began many years ago, but came to full bloom on Friday, and was confirmed on Saturday. Perhaps all of life is like a pregnancy in that way: Between conception and delivery, there are many detailed steps that have to occur. There are three stages of fetal development: germinal, embryonic and fetal. Most people don’t talk about their pregnancy in these terms, but it can be helpful to know.(Cleveland Clinic)

    I was riding my bike to a weekly thrift sale at Christ Community Church, here in Punta Gorda, on Friday, February 9, 2024, when I spotted a bird I could not identify. Not only could I not identify this bird, I knew beyond a doubt this was a species of bird I had never previously seen here, nor in Michigan, nor in Tennessee or anywhere else in the world I have ever been. As I stopped riding, parked my bike along the road, took out my phone and started walking that way, the bird flew up onto a utility pole. I snapped several photos but I was far away and the bird did not pose!

    The bird was bright blue, close to the blue of an Eastern Bluebird, but much larger, about the size (and similar to the shape) of a Blue Jay. Definitely not like the Blue Jay markings or head.

    At home that afternoon I began searching the internet and the fit that kept coming up was the Florida Scrub Jay. This bird is noteworthy on several counts. It’s the state’s only endemic bird, which means the Florida Scrub Jay is found nowhere else. It was listed as a threatened federal species by the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service in 1987 and is protected by the Federal Endangered Species Act. I knew about this bird because of two dear Michigan friends who were avid birders. He died in 2008, and here is their Florida Scrub Jay Sacred Story:

      Florida Scrub Jay
      Published by Debra Basham in Sacred Stories in February 2023

      She and her husband were avid birders. They loved traveling with a group, often going distant places in search of specific birds. One such sought-after species was the Florida Scrub Jay.

      According to Wikipedia, the Florida Scrub Jay is the only species of bird endemic to Florida and one of only 15 species endemic to the continental United States. Because of this, it is keenly sought by birders. She and her husband had made this trip previously with their group, but the Scrub Jay had eluded them each trip.

      After he passed, she decided to go to Florida in search of the Florida Scrub Jay one more time. This time, while she was there, she would spread some of her husband’s ashes.

      Although in Florida, there are no state laws or restrictions on where you can keep or scatter ashes, she wanted to do this privately. When she felt the time was right, she hung back from the group and discreetly scattered his ashes at her feet.

      Suddenly the entire group swarmed her! The precious, previously-elusive, prized Florida Scrub Jay flew down immediately and began eating her husband’s ashes!!!

      She laughed later with friends saying she wondered what parts of him were being enjoyed, but mostly she let her heart be held by this evidence of his loving presence….

    I sent the photos I took to my wonderful birding expert, Hart Rufe, who is a Snow Bird himself. He could not see the bird well on his phone but Saturday morning he responded, “I looked at the photo of the Jay on the wire, and was able to blow it up. It does indeed look like it could well be a Florida Scrub Jay. If there was one in that area, there should be more, as they are birds that hang out in small flocks of four or five together, with one normally on lookout duty.”

    I looked up the spiritual meaning of the Florida Scrub Jay. That seems beautifully timed for our world as well: The ability to find solutions when none present themselves obviously requires lateral thinking, creativity and a willingness to be innovative and pioneering. Scrub jay teaches and fosters this ability as a guide, its presence in your life suggests that the ability to problem-solve is strong in you at this time.

    Sunday morning I rode back to that area again, and while I did not have another sighting, yet, I had tears of awe realizing the odds of my seeing that rare bird while riding my bike past there at 10 MPH…..

    This Snow Bird was certainly blessed beyond words by seeing that beautiful and rare bird which also has such profound meaning related to my friends.

    Note* February 16 is the birth date of my Michigan birding friend whose ashes were savored that day by the Florida Scrub Jay.

  • God’s Message in My Boot!

    (Reposted from Facebook with permission from Shana.)

    During my prayer time this morning, I prayed about a situation I was wrestling to get my mind around. The situation wasn’t news to God. I am pretty sure God was probably like, “Yes, Shana, I get it; we’ve talked about this before.”

    Then, as I was getting dressed for work, I grabbed a pair of boots that I have worn at least a couple of times this season, and a piece of paper fell out. It was a fortune from a fortune cookie. I’m not sure how long that piece of paper was in my boot nor how it got there, but it was a message I needed to hear.

    “Develop some flexibility in your point of view.”

    Well played, God, well played.

  • Business Plan – Jaxx

    They were text chatting about mindfulness and Buddhism, and the mind states of greed, when he told her he was starting a real estate business, with the name Jaxx in it.

    She sent some information about the Buddhist practice of Muditā, a dharmic concept of joy, particularly an especially sympathetic or vicarious joy—the pleasure that comes from delighting in other people’s well-being. The traditional paradigmatic example of this mind-state is the attitude of a parent observing a growing child’s accomplishments and successes.

    She asked him if a slight change from thinking “I” must make this work to knowing “the universe” can make this work for the good of all beings lessens any fear for him. He said it did.

    Spontaneously, she searched for the spiritual meaning of the word Jaxx and this came up:

    In the Bible, it is the short form of Jaxon, meaning “God is gracious.”

  • Mary’s Magnificence

    She got flowers for a chanting session for their dear friend, Mary, who was on hospice care and very near the end of her life. After Mary retired, she had worked with community based organizations helping seniors deal with issues surrounding death and dying.

    That chanting session had been six weeks and 3 days ago….

    She wanted to see if the flower would survive until 49 days after Mary died. It was clearly almost gone, but she was so grateful she had saved it. When she went to look again, the flower and one green stem had moved from one side of the vase toward the center front.

    She said she knows the dog did not move it, and she is taking this to be a sign that Mary was there to mark the end of the 49 days1

    Many Buddhists believe 49 days is the longest length of time the intermediate or “bardo” state before a person’s next incarnation can last. “Could be that Mary’s already reincarnated, though I would think she might want to rest a bit before coming back,”she shared.

    So grateful to share in the magnificence that was and still is Mary.