Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: inspiration

  • Twenty-eight Years-Sueño

    Sacred Stories

    The three couples were best friends. One of the guys passed away.

    They all went to the Biscayne Bay for his memorial. Biscayne Bay is located on the Atlantic coast of South Florida, near Miami.

    The boat they went out on to spread his ashes was named Sueño.

    Twenty-eight years later, one of the guys went out fishing near his home in Southwest Florida, hours from the location where his friend’s ashes had been spread.

    In the distance he saw the name Sueño on a boat. Could it be?


    Coming closer, he saw the home port was Miami…

    Some interaction with the owner of the boat revealed that this was indeed the same boat!

    He took the photos of the boat which had been a part of something so significant for him so long ago. He could barely speak when he told his wife he had seen the boat. He wrote a song about the experience.

    His wife sent the recording of the song to their friend’s widow, who opened their email and heard the song on the 28th anniversary of the day of their friend’s passing…

  • Father John

    Sacred Stories

    She was on retreat.

    She put her hand up and the energy of Father John came in.

    She says she doesn’t exactly know what happened, but a couple of months later when she had an echocardiogram the mitral regurgitation that was discovered in her 20’s was gone!

    When she asked her cardiologist if it’s possible for mitral regurgitation to disappear, he said, “No. Perhaps mitral stenosis.”

    (Be willing to honor the nature of healing… Healing is a return to the ever-present well-being that is our true nature, and can happen any time.)

  • Life Itself

    How each of us views life differs slightly, but the themes of life itself are universal.

    Years and years ago I studied dream interpretation with a man who had trained at the C.G. Jung Institute. One aspect of dream meaning is to notice a theme that is emerging as an initiating dream.

    Three generations of women watching Life Itself, an American 2018 drama directed by Dan Fogelman which follows multiple couples over several generations, was a mixed bag. After watching it, I read that reviews were not great—calling the film “simultaneously overwrought and underwhelming.”

    Well, isn’t life itself simultaneously overwrought and underwhelming?

    This past week my husband and I have been staying in a house that has been the home of our daughter and son-in-law for over a decade. They are now house guests in that home. The house is now the home of our older grandson and our granddaughter-in-law. We are sharing this space with the six adults, three dogs, and two cats.


    Although the house looks different, Thanksgiving Brunch was held at this HOME, and tonight this HOME will host the annual Thanksgiving weekend “Soup Night.”

    I have done my regular duties of cleaning the inside of the microwave and wiping out the fridge. These are in addition to unloading the dishwasher and folding the laundry. I added polishing the outside of the toaster oven to this trip….

    One of the most fascinating aspects of a home is recognizing the way a home gives those in it gifts. Of course a home comes with costs and responsibilities for those in it too.

    We are grateful to have a roof over our heads. We appreciate a warm shower, and some of those in this home value a cold beer.

    Not to spoil the ending, but it has a happy ending.

    The final scene of the film is Elena reading from her book titled Life Itself. Elena’s dying grandmother is telling Elena’s father that although life may bring us to our knees, if we look hard enough, we will find love.

    Elena concludes her story by saying how one moment shaped her entire life, and that every bit of her has some of her mother, her father, and her grandmothers.

    That reminds me of the gift John made for me for Christmas in 2016: a wooden plaque with stick-on-letters: Not to spoil the ending—but everything is going to be OK.


    The craftsmanship of the plaque was not professional, but the wisdom and love are palpable. The message is one of those universal truths so that plaque hangs proudly in the laundry room of our home.

    Home is not just where you live. Home is also an internal state of being where you are. When life seems overwrought and underwhelming or underwrought and overwhelming, take heart. You know that life itself is still unfolding.

    Sometimes attributed to John Lennon: Everything Will Be Okay in The End, If It’s Not Okay, It’s Not The End.

  • Everything Holds it’s Opposite

    I grabbed this image from a Zen practitioner. Have you ever wondered what makes someone decide to make a commitment to something like Zen? For the most part, we want to be the best we can be.

    Today has been a productive day.

    I got so much done, I have energy to burn!

    What do you do with energy when you are revved up? Some people drink, some people smoke, some people eat, some people sleep. Some people exercise. I write!



    Yesterday morning I saw this amazing ice etching on the mail room windows. The blue sky was right there too. It was quite breathtaking.

    I am watching gorgeous pinks and blues spreading across the evening sky right now too.



    Beauty is everywhere, when you are watching.

    A friend’s husband has Alzheimer’s. He is in a facility. Last week he got punched in the stomach by another resident. She is recuperating from a knee replacement so she could not even go to see that he was OK. She was immediate in the feeling of how unfair this was; why him; he is such a great guy. Very quickly, though, she was also aware that she was holding onto something he had already forgotten. The very nature of the illness allows him to not hold onto anything painful.

    Abraham Hicks speaks very directly about Alzheimer’s. Only watch this if you are ready to let go of painful things that you have been holding onto.

    Whatever you are seeing, train yourself to see the opposite. Everything holds its opposite….

    Live solely from the center.

    Be still.

    Be.

  • Use Your Bird Brain

    I was writing in my journal how it seems otherworldly that we don’t plan to be back here in our Michigan home until April 6. As I write the question,”What would you have me know?” I hear in my head:

    V: Wherever you are is home. Notice how the selfing tells you this is home, this is not home. You are welcome to appreciate the creature comfort’s – just be in the experience rather than telling yourself stories.

    Can you see a bird that is migrating having a sense of “leaving home”?

    The bird is following an inner call. The bird goes. The bird eats, roosts, and sings wherever it is.

    Use your bird brain….

    Every day we are being invited to experience an expanded awareness. At a certain level of development, when asked what makes wind a child will say that the branches waving makes the wind. As our thinking expands, we understand warm and cold and upper level currents and wind.

    Many of us grew up without an understanding of “karma.” We may have even thought of karma as something only Buddhists experience. We may have perceived ourselves as immune from karma because we did not perceive it, like the child did not perceive the wind currents.

    Today’s quotation from Aaron says “Karma attaches to the emotional and mental bodies and it moves with you from lifetime to lifetime. Whatever insights you have as you move through the lifetime and the transition at the end of this lifetime, you do not lose them. Whatever you deeply understand stays with you. Whatever negative habit energies you have that are not released, they also stay with you. You do not lose anything, not the wholesome, not the unwholesome.”

    If you have not yet embraced an understanding of moving from lifetime to lifetime, simply think of this as moving from childhood to adulthood. As you move though your life whatever insights you have go with you. Likewise any negative habit energies you have that are not released stay with you.

    Worry, insecurity, impatience, desire for control…. these unwholesome habit energies are your karma.

    Joy, patience, kindness, enthusiasm, surrender…. these wholesome energies are also your karma.

    One of my favorite practices around all of this is the Daily Recollection. (See my November 2012 post Beads!)

    Marker bead: Namo Prajna, Paramita Hridaya. Homage to the wisdom mind.
    63rd Bead: Whatever has the nature to arise has the nature to cease and is not me nor mine.
    64th bead: When wholesome thoughts arise, cultivate the wholesome. When unwholesome thoughts arise, abandon the unwholesome.
    65th bead: Tend the contents of the mind with compassion, as a mindful gardener tends his garden.
    66th bead: This is the way to purify the mind and remove the clouds that obscure the vision of ultimate reality.

    Intention bead: In this way will I train myself.

    P.S. Send me an email or text message if you would like to receive and use the handout of Barbara Brodsky’s Daily Recollection.

  • Nips

    Sacred Stories

    When I sat six boxes of Nips on the counter at the local Walgreens, the cashier said, “You must really like these.”

    “I can’t easily get them while I am in Florida, so I like to stock up. They are only 30 calories. A great way to calm cravings,” I responded.

    “My grandma loved them….” her voice trailed off. “She passed away last June.”

    “Are you Hispanic?” I asked, and she nodded her head yes. “You are so fortunate your culture honors our loved ones continuing to be with us. Day of the dead…. Your culture knows you don’t have to wait until you die to be together.” I smiled.

    As she put the boxes in my bag she continued, “My daughter is nine months old. My friend and I were driving and my daughter was just smiling sitting in her car seat in the back. I told my friend she does that a lot. My friend said it is probably my grandma….”

    How wonderful to share this truth with one another. We were not strangers. Nips and her grandma had brought us together.

    Thank you, Grandma….

  • See the Blessings in Disguise

    Sacred Stories

    Her husband is in a facility after having had a major stroke almost two years ago. He is losing Medicaid coverage for physical therapy. The physical therapist expressed a willingness to volunteer her time to train the private-pay care team that was working to help him maintain physical strength they have been able to develop.

    Mere minutes before the training, the administration of the facility said their liability insurance prohibits anyone other than their licensed therapists doing therapy for him.

    She was so angry…. She went home frustrated and fuming.

    She got in the hot tub and was crying and crying.

    Finally some space opened up as she realized an option is to have the private-pay care team transport her husband to their home 4 to 5 days per week and do the therapy there.

    She cried even harder when she realized that this plan will likely make him much happier!

    What a blessing to be able to see the blessings in disguise….

  • Welcome Dad!

    Sacred Stories

    The small building out back had been her dad’s man cave. They called it willeyville.


    Her dad had passed, but she still loved the ambiance in that space.

    She writes:

    “I am out in willeyville lighting the fire and getting it warm because my sister is coming over and we are going to do a family craft project. While lighting the fire I heard a noise behind me and turned around and the door was open. I had shut that door. Welcome Dad!”

    Especially at this time of year, notice happenings that remind us our loved ones are still loving us and enjoying our enjoying our lives.

  • By Your Side

    Sacred Stories

    The two women had not previously met even though they had both lived in the same 55-and-over community for a few years. Their interaction at the mail station resulted in a conversation about their mothers having both passed.

    “My mom used to live in that blue house right there,” she pointed.

    That home was now owned by a dear friend of the other woman.

    “I know she is always with me,” she continued.

    “What evidence do you have that she continues to be with you?” the other woman asked.

    “She gave me this charm.” Her gloved hand held a charm with ‘I will always be by your side’ engraved on it.

    “It isn’t just the charm, though. I can feel her with me all the time,” she continued.

    The two woman hugged.

    What a wonderful chance meeting, and what an important reminder. Those who love us are never gone from us….

  • Love Makes the World Go Around

    Sacred Stories

    She was writing in her journal about ‘LOVE’ being four parts of speech: noun, verb, adjective, and adverb.

    She wanted to write a sentence using the word love as each of those. She wrote, “Noun: Love makes the world go around.”

    Then she could not think of how to use the other forms, so she did a Google search for ‘Is love an adverb?’

    Her Google search used her exact sentence: “OK, it’s not an usual adverb. Love is a noun and a verb. For example, “love makes the world go around.” …

    Lessons don’t always have to be earth shattering. Just notice the way things are. The way things are is plenty amazing!