Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: hair

  • Hair Experiences

    I almost did not go for an out-of-doors bike ride today because of a threat of rain and a fairly stiff wind, but the newborn leaves making their debut on the trees outside my window moved me. About 7 miles in, and very near home, the three walkers looked a rather odd trio from behind, and I spontaneously called out, “A rather unusual looking group of walkers!” They repeated my words and let their laughter speak agreement.

    Then I saw her from the front. She had one of those BRILLIANT streaks of color on one side only of her longish hair. Suddenly I had the judgment, “I am pretty mundane when it comes to hair.” My sister, Janis, has had light hair/dark hair; short hair to almost no hair; normal-colored and not-so-normal colored hair. Sometimes she has had more than two of these in the same day!

    In some traditions, hair is considered a metaphor for spirit and uncut hair the symbol of interconnectedness of all life. To cut one’s hair was thought to diminish strength or wisdom, while long hair represented a connection to the natural elements, including the spirit world and ancestors.

    I have an album of photos on my iPhone titled: Hair. I have selected three. One is my photo from the year I was Number One in Sales at Creative Galleries. The dark hair phase photo shows me giving a tiny grandson, Adam, a massage as he smiles a sleepy slur saying, “Every peoples ought to have a massage.” The back shot is of my post-Covid hair taken by my brother-in-love, Larry Britton, shortly before I donated it to Wigs for Kids.

    Last Friday evening we went to a “reunion” of The Dunns, a benefit concert of a Southern gospel band that Michael Springer, our music friend, toured with for many years. In addition to some old familiar gospel tunes, I heard some lyrics new to me that still linger, like the words to When I Get Carried Away © 2024 Heritage Singers.

    It is interesting that I had unknowingly changed the words of that song ever-so-slightly from when to ’til:

    I’m gonna have the time of my life ’til the time of my life is over; I’m gonna get carried away ’til I get carried away.

    Perhaps my hair experiences have not been as mundane as I first thought.

  • Hair


    Keep a watchful eye for spiritual materialism.
    Don’t look for a goal,
    but practice meditation nevertheless.

    Don’t try to push your ideas,
    don’t dictate,
    and don’t edit the dharma,
    the truth and the teachings.

    The dharma is yours,
    so you could relate to the dharma very simply.

    Let dharma come to you.

    If there is a conflict between you and dharma,
    if I may say so,
    it is your conflict.

    Dharma has no conflict.

    ~ Excerpted from: Milarepa: Lessons from the Life and Songs of Tibet’s Great Yogi,
    by Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche, pages 115–116

    My hair is getting so long!

    My hair brought to mind for John and me “Rapunzel,” the fairy tale by the Brothers Grimm. I had to look it up to remind myself of the details, so you might enjoy at least a refresher of the end.

    For two years the poor blind prince wandered the world, looking for Rapunzel. From morning to night he called for her, but it was no use. At last, he reached a desert. One day, he heard a beautiful voice singing. “Oh!” he thought. “I know that voice!” It was his dear Rapunzel! He went closer and closer to the voice he knew so well.

    “My prince!” called Rapunzel when she saw him. The two of them hugged tight. Two tears of joy fell into the eyes of the prince. All at once, he could see again!

    The opening quotation from Milarepa sits at a very hollow home in my heart, especially the phrase: “Don’t try to push your ideas, don’t dictate…”

    And that last line: “Dharma has no conflict.”

    I feel the subtle grasping to have our country and my world be free of conflict.

    That longing for freedom from conflict is amplified as we winter here in Florida where political signs continue to swing in the tropical breezes and the doors to restaurants and bars are wide open even as Covid cases continue to rise.

    Of course, these conditions are impermanent.

    This, too, shall pass.

    For those who are not inclined to click on the link to read the entire story of Rapunzel’s long hair, here is the end:

    And what happened next, well, I’m sure you can guess! The prince and Rapunzel went back to the kingdom where the prince lived. They were married as soon as they could. The prince became king of the land and Rapunzel became queen. The two of them lived happily ever after.

    Today, I will let the dharma come to me.

    Hair grows.