Tag: Debra Basham

  • It’s Perfect!

    It is only with the heart that one can see rightly;
    what is essential is invisible to the eye.

    ~Antoine de St. Exupéry

    Yesterday afternoon I attended Remembering Wholeness with The Mother, a divine feminine being channeled by Barbara Brodsky. The opening comments tied right in with a previous evening’s conversation about some ongoing pain. I had asked my friend to identify any way she has not befriended her body. She spoke right away: pushing her body when it was trying to get her to stop.

    Interestingly, the message I received from The Mother addressed the same dynamic for me on the emotional level.

      What is there in your heart that you have pushed aside feeling it may prevent you from coping; feeling it may diminish your strength if you hear this or that?

    The evening my dad died I went to my client’s home and did an art show.

    The afternoon my mom died I went back to Holistic Alliance and saw clients.

    The Mother closed her words to me with this phrase: It’s perfect. Perhaps not always pleasant, but perfect.

    She reminded me that nothing the heart speaks is good or bad. It is all simply movements of the heart — some more grounded in fear, some more grounded in love. “Unless you hear it all, there is not wholeness.”

    She offered encouragement: There is still some confusion that’s coming out of not deeply listening to and trusting your heart — your heart’s love, your heart’s wisdom.

    Even quoting lyrics from a Walt Whitman poem, “I Celebrate Myself, and Sing Myself,” over and over, person after person, the theme of the day was the importance of learning to cherish yourself, hear yourself, love yourself.

    As I walked alone in the dark last evening, I allowed tears to flow, saying to my heart over and over, “It’s perfect. Perhaps not always pleasant, but perfect.”

    Today, it is great-grandson, Jackson, who has my heart singing Karen Drucker’s “Gentle With Myself.”

      I will be gentle with myself
      I will be gentle with myself
      And I will hold myself like a newborn baby child
      I will be tender with my heart
      I will be tender with my heart
      And I will hold my heart like a newborn baby child
      And I will only go as fast
      As the slowest part of me feels safe to go
      I will be easy on myself
      I will be easy on myself
      And I love myself like a new born baby child
      And I will only go as fast
      As the slowest part of me feels safe to go
      I am gentle with myself
      I am gentle with myself
      And I hold myself like a new born baby child
      And I rock myself like a newborn baby child
      And I hold myself like a newborn baby child
      And I love myself like a newborn baby child
  • Repercussions and Moral Awareness

    We are all volunteers, come to awaken ourselves and all human beings. ~ Aaron

    A pithy line from the story of Joseph and his coat of many colors in the Hebrew Old Testament has been working on my heart. The story is familiar to many: Joseph, the youngest son and his father’s favorite, was given the special coat that had been (according to patriarchal tradition) owed to the eldest son. Joseph’s brothers were insulted, enraged, and vengeful. They sold Joseph into slavery and told their father Joseph had been killed.

    The karmic wheel is always turning.

    Joseph won favor with the Egyptian Pharaoh, and was put in charge of all of the stores of food. Years later, Joseph’s brothers came to Egypt desiring to buy food because of the famine. Imagine their shock to see the brother they had abused be the one in charge!

    Joseph could have justifiably responded in myriad ways, but Joseph responded from AWARENESS: As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today. ~ Genesis 50:20

    In my awareness, Joseph’s story was related to yet another covid death. Two days after our granddaughter, Courtney Ross, gave birth to our great-grandson, Jackson, her other great-grandfather died from covid-related pneumonia. RIP: George Ross.

    The mask and safe-distancing polarization…. Knowing many in that family continue to gather without precautions. I saw those as the “You meant evil.” I could also see the perfection of the timing – just a couple of days after Jackson’s birth. Many ancient cultures recognize the perfection of the coming in and passing on which happens in families.

    I could also see a gift that—being so soon after Jackson’s birth—his mom would not go to be with the extended family and take him, possibly exposing herself or him to the virus. I have been easy to tears about everything.

    Joy without sorrow would be hollow: having without losing. ~ Aaron

    My friend, Patty, recently lost her mother to covid-related heart failure. Her brother (an anti-masker) exposed Alma. Yes, she was 97, and Courtney’s grandfather was 90 — but both were fully engaged in life, both vital at those ages. Patty’s pain continued as her family was split in how to celebrate their mother’s life. Patty and some of her siblings not seeing it as responsible, made the difficult choice not to attend a large public gathering insisted on by other siblings.

    The karmic wheel of action was different for each.

    “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” ~ Romans 8:28

    It is possible to see the good/gift/perfection without denying the responsibility of an unwholesome action, as spoken recently in the dharma teachings: That was the first time I recognized my choices had repercussions in the world: I had the power to do good or to do harm.

    A Buddhist articulation of life describes Sila, or moral awareness, as “right view” (Eight-Fold Path): the seeing of things just as they are.

    It is said that in Hindi India the idea, “Oh, the gods willed it,” holds a lot of devotion, but not much responsibility. Regardless of what else is there, you are responsible for your choices as each choice has repercussions….

    My choice is to not give or get the coronavirus, if I can help it. Their are repercussions to every choice, such as my friend missing her mom’s funeral.

    The shadow is no less an aspect of the divine than the light.

  • 2021 – A True Spiritual Path

    Deep Spring Center
    Thought for Today
    December 31, 2020

    So often beings have a
    limited view of spiritual life
    that creates a duality in themselves,
    so that they only see themselves
    as ‘being spiritual’
    when they’re being kind and loving.

    When painful emotions arise,
    then they think,
    ‘I am no longer being spiritual.
    I should fix or get rid of these emotions
    and come back to kindness and
    then I will be spiritual.’

    But this dualistic thinking only
    enhances the fragmentation of the self and
    enhances negativity and suffering.

    To open the heart to the self,
    just as it is in this moment,
    is the true spiritual path.

    ~ Aaron

    As we turn the page on our calendar to 2021 at midnight tonight where ever you are, hindsight will be 2020. New Years has held a nostalgic space in my heart and mind for as long as I can remember, but just as 2021 offers unlimited possibilities, tomorrow is also just another day.

    What will you remember most from the past year? High on my list is the consistent kindness and generosity of our friends, Linda and Larry, consistently doing our grocery shopping for us. First, using InstaCart, and then going to the grocery store, just so we could limit our exposure to the coronavirus.

    I will remember the blessing of Zoom bringing the meditation hall into my home.

    I will also feel the sting of not going to Tennessee to visit Stacey’s family on our way home in April. Or having to tell Melody I could not do an in-person ceremony for her mom, my friend and colleague, who contracted COVID-19 while in the hospital with acute pancreatitis. Bonnie passed without Melody or Dan, Bonnie’s husband, having opportunity to be with her.

    No service of celebration of life for Fred Gibby yet either. They say it will be an ultimate hug-fest when the time is right. and Fred loves that idea!

    It is otherworldly to not have gotten to Kalamazoo to see Joel and the kitties; and very hollow that I did not unpack the office when contents were moved to the beautiful new space at Lakeshore Acupuncture.

    Immense gratitude for Barbara Brodsky and John Orr and Aaron and Jeshua (and all who help me remember who I really am) seeps deeply into every day.

    The take-out dinners and dominoes by Zoom.

    And now, Jackson Taylor Yarber, born December 28, 2020, has joined our family, and I am loving my first great-grandchild fully from Southwest Florida as he is in Tennessee. Fingers crossed it will be safe to hold him and smell him on our way back home in the spring.


    In the spring — the spring of 2021!

    It feels otherworldly to say that…

    2020 is ending.

    2021 is beginning.

    Suddenly, I am hearing a song from the musical Godspell in my head: Where are you going? Where are you going? Can you take me with you?

    Last December I was fixated on accessing a Magic Eye Wall Calendar! When I found one, I decided to gift a bunch of folks! Janis and I have ritualized the turning of the page on the first day of each month, letting the image come into view, noticing how some are very easy and others quite challenging.

    Interestingly, there will not be a Magic Eye Wall Calendar for 2021, as announced on the website: Our calendar publisher has asked us to wait until next year to publish a Magic Eye 2022 wall calendar, as printing, shipping and distribution channels have all been disrupted by Covid-19. We will not be releasing a Magic Eye 2021 wall calendar. Wishing everyone a happy & safe year!

    Janis and I have agreed to go back through each month of the 2020 Magic Eye Wall Calendar, enjoying again in 2021 what we learned in 2020.

    The missing and longing, and seeing and being. It has all been here all along.

    Here’s to 2021, a true spiritual path. It, too, has been there all along….

    “If you can see your path laid out in front of you step by step, you know it’s not your path. Your own path you make with every step you take. That’s why it’s your path.” ~ Joseph Campbell

  • Norman Hans Thor

    Sacred Stories

    It was Christmas following the passing of her husband in November.

    Searching for anything that would allow her to celebrate with their son and daughter, she settled on a three-wicked candle.


    They would each light a wick, as an expression of their continued love of him.

    But Norman Hans Thor, a near-life-sized moose, caught her attention as she passed a toy store window on her way to purchase the candle. The totally spontaneous purchase of Norman, as he is affectionately called, took over her mind completely. She forgot all about the candle in the excitement…


    Later, when she returned to town to purchase the precious candle, she was thrilled to find that it was on sale at 50% savings!

    Later, she found a Christmas candle holder that fit their special candle perfectly. Despite being totally blackened, the silver-plated holder cleaned up to reveal it’s true light.

    One of her husband’s nicknames was “Young Buck.”


    She shares, “Meeting a moose in a toy store window and finding a silver plated candle holder in the trash at a gas station is all about reminders that we are supported in every moment.”

    And the EnneaThought® for the Day (Type Six EnneaThought®) expressed this same truth:

    As you approach the start of a New Year, you can prepare for the transformation of your personality into Essence by realizing how extensively you are supported in every moment.

  • LOVE Came Down at Christmas

    I am grateful John and I had a practice run at not being physically with Stacey and her family for Christmas in 2019.

    Last year we attended a Christmas Day potluck at Pine Island Cove with Michigan friends, Linda and Fred, who also winter here in Florida.

    This year, John and I share our day with all of you in our hearts.


    Our hearts are uplifted by the truth: “We isolate this year so that when we can meet again next year no one will be missing.”

    Today, our home-away-from-home may be empty of friends and family, but my heart is full of love for each of you!

    Our hearts are filled with memories!

    Our hearts are warmed by Christmases past.

    Our hearts are nourished with the true meaning of Christmas:

      That Mary and Joseph—Mary heavy with child—traveled through the countryside.

      She was at the time of giving birth to the child.

      They found shelter, simple shelter.

      And many beings experiencing, “The light has been born! Ah… The light is back!”

      It wasn’t me, it was more that my birth opened the doorway so that the Heavenly light—the Love, the remembrance of Love—could pour through.

      What was that star? Let us metaphorically call it an opening in the dark heavens where the remembrance of light and Love could pour through—pour through to where I lay as an infant, not to highlight me but to remind humans nothing is hopeless.

      Light IS.

      Love IS.

      And it is right here.

      And it was pointing at me, but it could be pointing at any of you.

      Here is the ground of love and light.

      And the earth sang, “Halleluiah!” not for my birth but for the remembrance: LIGHT IS, LOVE IS.*

    * Jeshua, channeled by Barbara Brodsky on Christmas Eve 2020, sharing some thoughts about what Christmas means to him and how we can carry the meaning of Christmas through to our times.

  • I Am So Blessed

    Sacred Stories

    As she finished the morning yoga practice, reclining in rest pose, she began to spontaneously sing, “I am so blessed, I am so blessed, I am so blessed, I am so grateful for all that I have.”

    She grabbed her phone, did a search and came up with that single by Karen Drucker on YouTube.

    Curious, she said out loud, “Alexa, shuffle songs by Karen Drucker.”

    “Shuffling songs by Karen Drucker. Playing first, I Am So Blessed,” Alexa announced!

    May the wonder of the world find ways to guarantee that we notice….

  • Warp and Weft

    This post begins with a reprint of a Sacred Story published December 23, 2017: “Husband’s Clothes:”

    As she stood in line at the grocery store the man in front of her looked so much like her late husband it almost took her breath away. The same height, the same built, even a similar style of movement.

    Without thinking she spoke, “My husband passed recently and you are of such a similar build I am wondering if you are open to receiving his clothing. Some people are funny about that. I have been wondering what to do with them. He even has jeans he’s never worn…”

    “Well, that is very kind,” he smiled softly.

    They also discovered he wore the same size shoes as her husband, so those went with him, too. As he was leaving with his treasures he thanked her and confessed, “I have a new job that I have to wear ‘good’ jeans for. I only had this one pair, and I have been washing them every night and wearing them again the next day.”

    She suddenly realized she had obviously truly been guided.

    Warp and weft refer to the orientation of woven fabric. The warp direction refers to the threads that run the length of the fabric. Warp yarns are finer and stronger than weft yarns.

    Life is comprised of warp and weft. But the greatest of these is warp….

    Larry, the now beloved husband of my dear friend, Linda, had lost his wife, Joyce. Soon after we met, Larry wondered aloud to Linda, asking if she thought I would be offended to be offered some of Joyce’s clothing. Many of the items still had tags hanging on them…

    Assured by Linda that I would be honored, the clothes were lovingly given and received. As my fingers glide across the keyboard right now, I am wearing one of Joyce’s dresses.

    One of my friends is in the process of “death cleaning.” In Swedish it is called döstädning—dö is “death” and städning is “cleaning.” The process is simply to get rid of unnecessary things, especially important as you age. You know you will eventually leave the planet, taking nothing tangible with you — we all will.

    While we take nothing, we leave everything.

    After their passing, the influence of our loved ones remains.

    Thich Nhat Hanh shared a beautiful story:

      A friend of mine has been taking care of her ninety-three-year-old mother. The doctors say that her mother will die any day. For more than a year, my friend has been teaching her mother meditation exercises that have been very helpful. She began by watering the seeds of happiness in her mother, and now her mother becomes very alive every time my friend comes around. Recently she told her mother, “This body is not exactly yours. Your body is much larger. You have nine children, dozens of grandchildren, and also great-grandchildren. We are all continuations of you, and we are very happy and healthy. You are quite alive in us.”

      Her mother was able to see that, and she smiled. My friend continued, “When you were young, you were able to teach many people how to cook and do many other things. You made people happy. Now we are doing the same thing; we are continuing the work you have begun. When you were young, you wrote poetry and sang, and now many of us write poems and sing beautifully. You are continuing in us. You are many beings at the same time.” This is a meditation on nonself. It helps her mother see that her body is just a small part of her true self. She understands that when her body departs, she will continue in many other forms.

    During the December 16, 2020, “Evening with Aaron,” I heard an amazing story about Nathaniel, a follower of Jesus. Nathaniel’s group had been brutalized, all of their ceremonial objects stolen, along with their food!

    When Jesus learned of this, he took Nathaniel with him and went to confront those responsible. Nathaniel was frightened they would be beaten again. Jesus admitted they might, they were outnumbered, but Jesus insisted that they must be willing to say, “No!”

    Confronted by the Divine Love in Jesus, the men stepped back.

    Imagine Jesus speaking about this:

      I would not have hurt them — how could I hurt them?

      But they had to hear this truth. “Where is that within you which is capable of love, which is capable of non-harm? Remember from whence you have come and cease to destroy. I ask this in the name of our Father and with love. Cease to do harm to each other and yourselves.”

      I motioned to Nathaniel to pick up the blanket and the candlesticks.

      He was a bit afraid, but I nodded to him, “Take them. They belong to our Father, not to this band.”

      “Keep the food,” I told the men. “If you are hungry, please eat. But these tokens of the Sabbath I bring back with me, lest you desecrate them.”

      No one stepped forth to stop us.

      I’m sure if Nathaniel were here in the body he would tell you he was trembling! And yet, his love, his deep commitment to service of all beings —

      Here I am, Lord.
      Is it I, Lord?
      I have heard you calling in the night.
      I will go, Lord, if you lead me.
      I will hold your people in my heart.

      The same commitment you all have.

      We took these candlesticks, rewrapped in the blanket, and simply walked off into the dark. We walked back to the village. These men never came to brutalize that village again.

      People can learn.

    The warp direction of our fabric is the Divine Love that runs the length of human existence. The warp of this Divine Love is finer and stronger than greed, hatred, brutality or any of the faces of fear. Just as the band of men who had stolen from Nathaniel were disarmed, every face of fear vanishes with the warp of love.

    Warp and weft. People can learn….

  • Two Wings of Mindfulness

    Deep Spring Center
    Thought for Today

    If one never were to experience this
    dark night of the soul,
    one’s compassion
    really would be limited.

    One may have a belief,
    ‘I can be compassionate
    with that which is light
    and beautiful and loving
    in myself and others’
    but one has never tested it
    to see if
    one can also extend that compassion,
    even to the utmost of darkness.

    ~ Aaron

    This morning I did something I rarely do. I followed a link and read an article after the headline caught my attention: Deadliest place in America: They shrugged off the pandemic, then their family and friends started dying.

    Dinkel says too many people are refusing to do their part to protect the elderly from COVID-19.

    “To sit there and say they are old that they will die of something,” she says, “Well, they wouldn’t have died of the flu. My dad wouldn’t have been in the hospital for a month if this was the flu.”

    Despite the efforts of local public health officials and experts, many residents aren’t taking the deadly pandemic seriously. Bearded farmers stride defiantly down Main Street past signs requiring them to wear masks. School is still in session and churches are open. Someone threatened to blow up the home of a pro-mask county commissioner.

    Nicholson, the ambulance worker, is also co-owner of a restaurant and brewery on Main Street, and she’s had customers swear they’ll never come back after she reminded them to wear a mask when picking up food. She doesn’t want to wade into the middle of a political dispute. She just wants her neighbors to live.

    But this post is not about COVID-19, even though four of our high-school classmates died of the coronavirus in just one week at home.

    This post is about how mindfulness is like a bird — both need two wings to fly. The two wings of mindfulness are wisdom (clear seeing) and compassion.

    Compassion is a result of seeing life’s experience clearly, therefore not everyone’s experience generates compassion. Life’s experiences reveal our world view.

    The people in the deadliest place in America justify not wearing masks by saying the people who are dying are old, and people die in God’s time. The kernel of truth in not only toxic, it is deadly.

    Sunday morning I went to the only grocery store here on the island. I had read “masks required” on the ad, and I checked out the website of the company to read the same thing. “Masks required” was also on the entry doors. However, customers were coming in and shopping and getting service without a mask.

    Numbers in this small community on the south end of the island are climbing, yet, the Ragged Ass Saloon still hosts live music and welcomes wall-to-wall (if you can use that term about a parking lot) patrons not wearing masks or maintaining safe distancing.

    As human beings, we all try our best to bring about a world based on kindness and compassion. What seems to go wrong, however, is that what I want, what I personally would like, becomes more important than the benefit of the whole community.

    Yes, death will come to each of us. That is not failure. The bloom is the bud’s undoing…

    We are capable of spreading our wings and soaring to the heights of wisdom and compassion.

    As the Buddha said, “If it were not possible, I would not ask you to do it.”

  • What Else?

    One of the amazing gifts of wintering on Pine Island is the variety of plant life that flourishes in the sunshine and warmth of Southwestern Florida.

    People (and plants) can be so very creative. People and plants can also be quite destructive.

    This succulent was planted in the center of a landscape boulder and placed close to the road so the colors and textures playfully peek out, as if saying hello to passers by!

    Succulents are plentiful. I took this photo a few days ago and sent it to Davey and Eli, Canadian friends who are not sure if they will be able to come down this season due to COVID.


    The trees are also quite different here, like this “strangler” fig. Many varieties of strangler trees exist in the tropics, and they can damage or even kill the host tree.


    Citrus trees certainly don’t grow in Michigan but they do thrive in this climate. Citrus blossoms are very aromatic. You can often smell the fragrance before seeing the trees!

    This week, a special citrus tree was removed from the yard at the former home of my friend and fellow-poet, Katey. Katey’s home on Skipper Lane here in Cherry Estates was the first home we wintered in, way back in 2013. We were fortunate to stay in that home for three winters. Katey and I were both sad about this tree’s removal.

    The following poem is a tribute to that special tree and an invitation for a more mindful living with respect to all sentient beings:

      What Else?

      It was obvious new owners were making changes
      My intention was to leave a note on your door
      Asking permission to harvest the lemons

      Now the haunting question remains:
      Had the note been written,
      Might a precious meyer lemon tree have been saved?

      Your lips will never taste a meyer lemon pie
      Nectar squeezed from the fruit
      Reverently picked from the branches of your meyer lemon tree
      Now no other lips will curl in delight
      From that sweet fruit either

      Carefully shaking the trunk
      Clarence taught me the secret to the best pies
      Gather only those lemons that fall
      Ready, succulent, ‘ripe for the picking’
      Willingly releasing their hold on the branch
      And offering their juices

      For six winters I have known
      THIS meyer lemon tree
      As it predictably produced
      Culinary joy for so many

      Your “unwanted vegetation”
      Now cleared
      Left as yard waste
      Was the mother of such taste!

      What else is unrecognized as precious, delicious, nourishing?
      What else has been heedlessly discarded?
      What else offers itself without recognition?
      What else awaits honoring even now….

  • What Remains is Enough

    There’s going to be pain that feels overwhelming.
    There are going to be situations
    that come up where
    we just suddenly freeze up and say,
    “I don’t know how to do this.”

    ~ Barbara Brodsky

    This is certainly a time of accepting what is and knowing that what is, is enough. The current version of this process began for me last March when Lee County, Florida, experienced it’s first fatality from a confirmed community-transmitted case of the coronavirus.

    As John and I began to self-isolate, I would gently remind myself of the truth: we can live with what we have for a long time. We can hold the desire for something else with compassion. We can notice the voice inside that habitually insists, “I want it this way!”

    I was naïve enough at that time to see everyone doing what was quite difficult for a short period of time, so together we could quickly move through this pandemic with grace and ease.

    Of course, I notice subtle judgment about those who continue having big gatherings, “We could be done with this if THEY would do what is needed.”

    I watch mindfulness to conserve.

    I still move a new sheet of paper towel from “use with food” to “use to clean,” rather than grab a clean sheet and then toss it. In the toilet, I limit most wipes to four squares, if you know what I mean.


    Okay. I don’t know how to do this.
    Can I give myself permission
    not to know how to do it?

    And then finally
    I can come to the part that says,
    “Yes, I do know how to do this.”

    ~ Barbara Brodsky

    As we traveled from Michigan to Florida this past weekend, we took what we learned from our trip home last April. We had food, water, and potty preparations in the van with us. I used safe protocol when we had to stop for fuel.

    We opted for a Zoom Thanksgiving with my sister, Janis, and brother-in-love, Larry.

    We chose to stay in a hotel near Stacey, and to wear two masks while visiting with Stacey and Doug, Brad and Christina, and Adam — and Baxter and the cats!!!


    Later today I will make a sign for the lanai door here on Bounty Lane saying we are safe-sheltering. Not at all our normal, not at all our desired — but enough.

    I have some curiosity about those who have tested positive and are navigating the virus but have requested that information not be shared. My wondering about it is, “Are they experiencing guilty feelings about having contracted this virus?”

    We played our first Zoom dominoes game last evening with Linda and Larry while we are here on Bounty Lane and they are still at Lot 101 at home in Glenaire. While our location has changed, much remains the same.

    The theme of our meditation retreats has been about what remains.

    What remains in my cupboard? What remains as we continue to navigate a global pandemic? What remains when a loved one passes?

    What remains is LOVE. What always remains is LOVE. And LOVE is enough.

    It was great to take Michigan apples to Stacey. It was wonderful to deliver her favorite sauerkraut casserole. We loved seeing the beautiful improvements to their home. It was sweet to share homemade caramel corn with Christina.


    The ego doesn’t
    know how to do this,
    but the deeper self does.

    The heart mind,
    the wisdom and compassion heart,
    knows how to do it.

    ~ Barbara Brodsky

    We have already started getting mail here. In addition to having sent John his usual insulting (it’s a game they have played for years!) birthday card, Lee Mapes sent us a very impressive Christmas card, appropriate for snowbirds!



    And he gifted us with an Echo Show 8!

    Lee is a loyal friend, but it is not about what he buys (although he is generous that way too). Lee remains. Lee’s love remains.

    Lee navigated Stacey’s adolescence with us as John was on the road for Morton Shoes. Early one Sunday morning he went to our house in Saint Joseph, broke into our garage to get the suitcases that were inadvertently left there, and drove them to Midway Airport in Chicago.

    I took him to the hospital when he had hernia surgery. I brought him to our home and cared for him until he was able to go home. Stacey is Lee’s legal and medical representative.

    There is enough love, enough generosity, enough wisdom and kindness to get through this with grace and ease, regardless of how long it takes, because what remains is enough….