Tag: COVID

  • The True Meaning of Home

    The other evening we were talking about our favorite childhood book/s. Mine was The Boxcar Children. It is a story about four orphaned siblings who must find a way to fend for themselves or risk being separated.The children have a grandfather they have never met, but they are afraid he is mean because he did not seem to like their mother. An abandoned boxcar, near a stream, is luxury compared to sleeping inside a hay stack all day! Working odd-jobs, the children use hard work to cultivate self-reliance until they must seek medical care for Violet, at risk of losing their independence.

    After much process and some candid conversation with my dharma sister physician friend, Stacey decided to get the Johnson & Johnson vaccine while she was here. It was convenient. She, admittedly, still had some reservations.

    As she was waiting for her shot she said, “The first person who thanks me for getting the shot is going to piss me off.”

    “Then let me be the first so you get it out of the way. Thank you.” We both cried and hugged.

    When she sat down to go over the paperwork, I said to the woman, “She is doing this for her mother.”

    The woman glanced at me, “Are you her mother?” When I said I was, she turned back to Stacey and confessed, “I did it for my dad.”

    I am not exactly sure why Henry, Jessie, Violet, and Benny were so memorable, or why I can still FEEL the safety of their boxcar. The relief they expressed upon discovery of a safe place to call home was familiar to me as a child. Having grown up with an alcoholic father, I know that feeling of longing for a home in the core of my being.

    Although I loved to go visit friends, overnights often turned into feelings of homesickness. I sometimes feel that even as an adult.

    One website addressed “cosmic” and “Lemurian” homesickness: Sometimes you feel trapped in your life, in your body, separated by your skin from the truth of the world and the people around you. Lonely and disconnected. You gaze skyward, knowing home must be up there, somewhere. You long for the feeling of your soul’s most familiar surroundings.

    Yes, that is the longing I had during the time Covid (and politics, and religion….) created the feeling of homesickness.

    Wynn, from Brentwood Bay, British Columbia, in Grade 5, wrote about home so clearly.

    Home means an enjoyable, happy place where you can live, laugh and learn. It’s somewhere where you are loved, respected, and cared for. When you look at it from the outside, home is just a house. A building. Maybe a yard. But on the inside, it’s a lot more than wood and bricks. The saying “Home is where the heart is” says it all.

    Home is also where your memories lie. Home is where I got my head stuck under the couch. Home is where I fell in the goldfish pond. I remember sleeping in the playhouse, falling down the stairs and climbing up the apple tree. Without memories, most people wouldn’t be the people that they are today.

    Just like memories, home is also where your hopes and dreams are.

  • August 12, 1962

    The dharma talk was direct. You don’t have to be a Buddhist to practice the precepts. The precepts are practical. I vow to harm none. I vow not to take what is not freely given. I vow not to misuse sexuality. I vow to refrain from false speech. I vow to refrain from intoxicants that can lead to heedlessness. The dharma teacher summarized it as I do not harm myself in thought, speech, or actions and I do not harm others.

    He continued to clarify how it is not just guarding against not hurting self or others, it is also about helping. It is not just about not taking what is not freely given, it is about generosity. It is not just about avoiding suffering, it is also about experiencing joy.

    I wrote in my journal: Today is a flip-the-calendar day, and today Stacey (our daughter from Tennessee) arrives.

    I drew an Osho Zen Tarot card, asking specifically about the risk related to the Delta variant. Stacey is not vaccinated. I drew 9 of Rainbows: Ripeness, and the message seeps into my soul, “Only if your meditation has brought you a light that shines in every night will even death not be a death to you but a door to the divine…. you become one with the ocean…. and unless you know the oceanic experience, you have lived in vain. Now is always the time and the fruit is always ripe…. There is no such thing as wrong time.”

    Reading from “A Midnight Clear” by Katherine Patterson in The Big Book for Peace found in the Little Free Library a few days ago, I meet a young boy who was experiencing fear after the nuclear bomb was dropped on Japan, until he meets a homeless woman who is likely sick and dying and learns from her how he, too, can “be not afraid.”

    Recently I sent those words from the corpse prayer as written by Jarem Sawatsky in Dancing with the Elephants: Mindfulness Training For Those Living With Dementia, Chronic Illness or an Aging Brain (How to Die Smiling Series, #1) to a friend.

    Be not afraid…. I embrace sacred life…. I embrace sacred death….

    A flood of tears come. All the feelings from so many years. All of the emotions from this path of pandemic. Iask the guides and helpers to help transform loneliness (absence of the other) into aloneness (presence of the self).

    Am I concerned about my un-vaccinated daughter coming for a visit? Yes. Am I afraid for her? Yes. Am I afraid for me? Yes.

    Be not afraid…. I embrace sacred life…. I embrace sacred death….

    P.S. I said to John last night that it would be so wonderful if she told us she had gotten vaccinated, but I welcome peace NOW that is not conditioned on someone or something else. There is no such thing as a wrong time.

    Will she get Covid? Will I? The future will reveal itself. If this is my time to die, can I embrace the sacred death? If this is my time to live, can I embrace the sacred life?

    I put the pen in my left hand and let spirit write:

      You know there is no dead. The leaving of the body is just a step on the path.

      You know the ocean-ness. You have always known that.

      It is eleven days until August 12.

    (August 12, 1962 — at age 12 — I had a near-death experience.)


    From the online information about The Big Book for Peace, by by Ann Duren and Marilyn Sachs: Peace — the issue of our times — affects everyone, but especially children, who deserve and wish for a peaceful future. Now over 30 of the best-loved authors and illustrators for children have combined their talents in a big, wonderful book for and about peace.

  • What Remains is Enough

    There’s going to be pain that feels overwhelming.
    There are going to be situations
    that come up where
    we just suddenly freeze up and say,
    “I don’t know how to do this.”

    ~ Barbara Brodsky

    This is certainly a time of accepting what is and knowing that what is, is enough. The current version of this process began for me last March when Lee County, Florida, experienced it’s first fatality from a confirmed community-transmitted case of the coronavirus.

    As John and I began to self-isolate, I would gently remind myself of the truth: we can live with what we have for a long time. We can hold the desire for something else with compassion. We can notice the voice inside that habitually insists, “I want it this way!”

    I was naïve enough at that time to see everyone doing what was quite difficult for a short period of time, so together we could quickly move through this pandemic with grace and ease.

    Of course, I notice subtle judgment about those who continue having big gatherings, “We could be done with this if THEY would do what is needed.”

    I watch mindfulness to conserve.

    I still move a new sheet of paper towel from “use with food” to “use to clean,” rather than grab a clean sheet and then toss it. In the toilet, I limit most wipes to four squares, if you know what I mean.


    Okay. I don’t know how to do this.
    Can I give myself permission
    not to know how to do it?

    And then finally
    I can come to the part that says,
    “Yes, I do know how to do this.”

    ~ Barbara Brodsky

    As we traveled from Michigan to Florida this past weekend, we took what we learned from our trip home last April. We had food, water, and potty preparations in the van with us. I used safe protocol when we had to stop for fuel.

    We opted for a Zoom Thanksgiving with my sister, Janis, and brother-in-love, Larry.

    We chose to stay in a hotel near Stacey, and to wear two masks while visiting with Stacey and Doug, Brad and Christina, and Adam — and Baxter and the cats!!!


    Later today I will make a sign for the lanai door here on Bounty Lane saying we are safe-sheltering. Not at all our normal, not at all our desired — but enough.

    I have some curiosity about those who have tested positive and are navigating the virus but have requested that information not be shared. My wondering about it is, “Are they experiencing guilty feelings about having contracted this virus?”

    We played our first Zoom dominoes game last evening with Linda and Larry while we are here on Bounty Lane and they are still at Lot 101 at home in Glenaire. While our location has changed, much remains the same.

    The theme of our meditation retreats has been about what remains.

    What remains in my cupboard? What remains as we continue to navigate a global pandemic? What remains when a loved one passes?

    What remains is LOVE. What always remains is LOVE. And LOVE is enough.

    It was great to take Michigan apples to Stacey. It was wonderful to deliver her favorite sauerkraut casserole. We loved seeing the beautiful improvements to their home. It was sweet to share homemade caramel corn with Christina.


    The ego doesn’t
    know how to do this,
    but the deeper self does.

    The heart mind,
    the wisdom and compassion heart,
    knows how to do it.

    ~ Barbara Brodsky

    We have already started getting mail here. In addition to having sent John his usual insulting (it’s a game they have played for years!) birthday card, Lee Mapes sent us a very impressive Christmas card, appropriate for snowbirds!



    And he gifted us with an Echo Show 8!

    Lee is a loyal friend, but it is not about what he buys (although he is generous that way too). Lee remains. Lee’s love remains.

    Lee navigated Stacey’s adolescence with us as John was on the road for Morton Shoes. Early one Sunday morning he went to our house in Saint Joseph, broke into our garage to get the suitcases that were inadvertently left there, and drove them to Midway Airport in Chicago.

    I took him to the hospital when he had hernia surgery. I brought him to our home and cared for him until he was able to go home. Stacey is Lee’s legal and medical representative.

    There is enough love, enough generosity, enough wisdom and kindness to get through this with grace and ease, regardless of how long it takes, because what remains is enough….