Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: coincidences

  • In the Stillness

    Breaking my own rule, my fingers are on the keyboard as I am listening to Claire Zammit sharing the keys and tools on how to activate and awaken even greater levels of your Feminine Power. As she says, “It might not be linear or logical,” I relate. Hearing her say, “You must find and clear the deep blocks to your connection with your Higher Power,” I have a deep longing for all beings to thrive in this connection.

    Earlier this week, I shared Karen Drucker’s “In the Stillness” with a colleague. As we listened, we both felt that coming into alignment.

    In The Stillness
    Words & Music: Karen Drucker
    In the stillness of this moment there is peace, there is peace.
    In the stillness of this moment there is peace, there is peace.
    And I rest, and trust, and breathe, and know,
    that in the stillness of this moment, there is peace.
    (There is love, I feel love, I am peace, I am love, I am.)

    Zammit describes women who don’t trust life, who don’t value themselves, who don’t feel supported. She says it is not our fault. Her research has discovered how women stepped away from Feminine Power when we took on the masculine power which (1) sets goals (2) creates a plan (3) works hard for what you want. She says we have been brainwashed by this masculine power which says we can do it by ourselves, creating barriers to receive support.

    What are your barriers to receiving support? Have you had beliefs that you were weak or unworthy? How will your life work better as you join with others who are standing for each others’ greatness?

    In the masculine form of power exist competition, comparison, and conquest.

    In the feminine form of power, we gather around one another, and we surrender into the greatness we came into this world to share.

    As much as I enjoy the words feminine power, I prefer to recognize it as our authentic power. This power belongs to women and men. Gary Zukav has been encouraging us to remember and live from the authentic power of love for over thirty years.

    Love
    Intimacy
    Vulnerable
    Compassionate
    Open heart
    Co-operative
    Win-win
    Shares
    Self-responsible
    Open to intuition
    Harmony
    Co-creation
    Wants to heal
    Faces fear
    Creates authentic power
    Integrity
    Self-aware
    Spiritually growing
    Detached from outcome
    Changes inner world

    PLEASE WATCH this interview with Oprah and Gary where they talk about each of us having a “mother ship” that guides us. At about 16 minutes into the interview, Gary speaks with a couple who had recently had a twin son live four days. The interview reminded me so much of the precious gift of Ella and I am so grateful to her mom for recognizing her as a soul.

    In the stillness of this moment I am love. And so is Ella, so are you….

  • Dora

    Sacred Stories

    Our sweet new baby was born very premature. She was so tiny, and fragile, and she was having episodes of not breathing from time to time.

    I took my angel statue to the hospital and placed it over our sweet baby’s head.

    That was the end of breathing episodes.

    God is so good.

    The angel’s name is Dora.

    P.S. Now six months old, our baby girl weighs 20 pounds! Here she is with Dora.

    These are sacred stories. Pay attention to happenings in your life. Do you have a story to share? Send email to debra@scs-matters.com.

  • Running Late

    Sacred Stories

    She was on her way to her Tuesday afternoon gathering. She called to say that she was running about five minutes later than usual.

    “Didn’t you get the email saying I am down with a bug and we are not meeting today?” her friend responded.

    She had not received the email message.

    And she had never called to say she would be late. The informal gathering was about thirty minutes before the formal sitting. She would have arrived in plenty of time for that.

    Prompted to make that call, she saved herself about an hour round-trip drive….

    These are sacred stories. Pay attention to happenings in your life. Do you have a story to share? Send email to debra@scs-matters.com.

  • Sweeping as Spiritual Practice

    I have known for a long time that when I am stressed, cleaning calms me. It was Thomas Moore’s Care of the Soul that first helped me value sweeping as spiritual practice.

    But sweeping is not just spiritual practice on the physical plane. In fact, “sweeping” might be the most important aspect of our physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being.

    We replaced white carpet with vinyl plank flooring. We are astounded at how much stuff we sweep up. Look closely to see what came from my 3×5 kitchen area, in just two days.

    Our spring yoga retreat always includes an after-lunch meditation. This year we will do the following exercise to release emotions that had been stored in your body.

    Exercise: Release Emotions that had been Stored in the Body

    Because emotions can be stored in your body beneath your conscious awareness, it is helpful to notice how “yes” and “no,” “true” or “false” feel in your body. Focus your attention down the centerline of your body, in your core, between your pelvis and your throat.

    As you think about three statements you know are “yes” or “true” and three statements you know are “no” or “false” you will notice the nuance between the two. Make it easy by choosing statements like your name, the current month, your current location. (pause)

    Now ask if there are emotions that have been stored in your body that it is would be helpful for you to release today. Ask if there are more than one, more than two, more than three….until you imagine, notice, or just know the number of emotions you will be clearing today.

    Now breathe and imagine, notice, or just know where in your body this first emotion had been stored. It might be a specific place, or it might be very general.

    Breathe and imagine, notice, or just know what gift or lesson this emotion came to bring. Humans learn both by pleasant and painful experiences. If a young child touches a hot stove, ouch! There might be a burn, a blister, it may even leave a small scar after the healing is complete. But the child learned something very valuable. You actually learn how to keep yourself safe by both pleasant and painful experiences.

    Breathe and release…. just appreciate the relationship that humans have with nature. When you breathe in oxygen goes to your blood, your organs, your cells, and when you breathe out you release everything that is no longer beneficial for you.

    Just breathe and release…. As you breathe in and out the emotions are being released from your body. Thank your body for releasing these emotions and for allowing you to integrate the gifts or lessons into your life.

    Now that you have been able to release these emotions that had been stored in your body, you will be able to notice the ways you enjoy your life more now and into the future. You might notice that you feel lighter. You might be aware thoughts, attitudes, beliefs, or even memories have changed in delightful ways. Perhaps you will not notice how you are different now, but you will just find that life works better and better for you now. However well your process unfolds now, it has begun today by releasing emotions that had been stored in your body.

    Breathe…. let yourself release. Breathing, thanking your body for releasing the emotions, and allowing you to fully integrate all of the learnings from all of the time of your life. Breathe and release…. allowing yourself to know you have changed in very delightful ways. You have released emotions today. Breathing and releasing…. letting your body, your breath, your mind, your spirit breathe in and out.

    I recall clearly the feelings of skepticism that used to be the way I greeted new information. It is much wiser to let your own experience lead. If this makes sense to you, your own faith is the foundation for safe expansion. All new ideas meet initially with resistance, before finally being accepted as the norm.

    Maybe you will also find that sweeping calms your body, mind, and spirit.

    Another form of sweeping involves clearing the aura of “attachments.” Our book club has been looking at a small book with a big message. Everyone should probably watch the short interview with Edith Fiore about spirit release work. Here is also a comprehensive summary of her book, The Unquiet Dead.

  • Cheesecake for Two

    Sacred Stories

    She had usually baked a cheesecake for her husband’s birthday. He would have been 63.

    She bought a piece of cheesecake to take home.

    When she got home and opened the box, inside were two forks dipped in chocolate….

    These are sacred stories. Pay attention to happenings in your life. Do you have a story to share? Send email to debra@scs-matters.com.

  • It is Time!

    “When you can bring your own energy forth to truly hear others in a compassionate way
    and can create compassionate dialogue,
    then you give them a model to bring forth to others who have a more opposite view.

    It is this steady expansion of the loving heart we all share that is the greatest hope towards peace.

    But even if peace does not come at this time,
    still that loving heart is expanding.
    When it expands far enough, there will be peace.

    Yes, there may be a lot of death and destruction before.
    But hatred will never lead to peace.
    Fear will never lead to peace.

    Fear of fear will never lead to peace, and hatred of hatred will never lead to peace.
    Trust your capacity for love.”
    ~ Aaron,
    Deep Spring Center
    Thought for Today

    Our plans were to attend a colleague’s “laughter yoga” presentation but the three of us arrived at the venue only to discover the presentation had been cancelled due to a death in the family. I live very nearby, so soon we settled around the kitchen island, sipping tea in such a sisterly fashion.

    Your guess is as good as mine how the conversation settled around her seemingly life-long dissatisfaction with her birth sister. The stated question was about her desire to block her sister’s text messages. We tossed, we tangled, we slogged through decades of sibling turmoil before going our separate ways.

    It felt restless, almost tragic. In my heart it was so much more…

    I opened email to read:

    June 19, 2018
    Tenderness Tinged by Sadness

    Fear does not allow fundamental tenderness to enter into us. When tenderness tinged by sadness touches our heart, we know that we are in contact with reality. We feel it. That contact is genuine, fresh, and quite raw.

    Excerpted from:

    “Overcoming Doubt,” in Smile at Fear: Awakening the True Heart of Bravery
    by Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche,
    page 58

    That was it! Where was tenderness? Where was the true heart of bravery needed to love someone who is behaving in an unloving manner?

    I opened my next email:

    On this day of your life I believe God wants you to know …

    … that if you become ruffled with every comment that
    you consider a ‘slight,’ you will never find peace.

    Nor will you find it by always separating yourself from
    those who ruffle you. You can only end so many
    friendships before you find yourself very much alone.
    You can keep making new friends, of course, but
    sooner or later they will ruffle you — and then what?

    Perhaps the better course might be to let the ruffle
    go. People rarely mean it when they do that, and a
    touch of gentle tolerance and easy forgiveness every
    day is even better than an apple…

    Love, your Friend …
    Neale Donald Walsch

    Craft Tip #11 (p. 92-98), from The Crafty Poet: A Portable Workshop by Diane Lockward, clevely rewriting “You Are Tired” by e.e. Cummings, I have discovered my own “voice.” Writing this allowed me to finally experience peace around all the pain that family members can inflict upon one another without ever meaning to. I trust you will agree, “It is Time!”

    It is Time!

    It is time
    (We know)
    Possibilities lie beyond this moment now;
    You are ready.
    Let us join hands
    Go to a place where new dreams are born-
    (Listen. Our names are being called!)

    We can go
    (I hope)
    To a place where the forlorn gather
    When the heart yearns for relief;
    Done with things as they are-
    Just that.
    We are done.

    Travel to heaven comes not without peril
    But the path is clearly written within your own chest-
    Just say yes!
    Your feet will find their way, one sure step and then the next
    For it is time
    We will be safe, rest assured.

    Let’s set off now
    Sail the seas of satisfaction to the shores
    Of eternal serenity;
    Hear the sounds of true solace
    No more singing the dirge;
    Music made from the instrument of sheer joy
    Resonating with each precious soul
    Suffering no more (Pray tell!) not we
    We who know it truly is time.

    Debra Basham 6-22-2018

  • Renewal of Mind, Body, and Spirit

    “Without renewal of mind, there is no transformation.”
    ~Lailah Gifty Akita, Ghana-born PhD student in geosciences, author;
    age not provided at goodreads.com

    This opening quotation in a friend’s daily thought really spoke to me. June 16, 2018, I celebrated the birthday of my dear friend and yoga teacher in a small class that meets on Saturday mornings at my office. The five of us are close, not just friends, but more like sisters.

    Left to right: Norleen, Debra, our teacher Kathy, Nancy, and Claudia.

    Let’s just say we are all women of a certain age.

    As women, we share a lot more than yoga, but yoga is something we love. We each have come to yoga for different reasons, at different times, and in different places, but we treasure being together in yoga now because yoga is about renewal of Mind, Body, and Spirit.

    The five of us are beautiful women, inside and out. We have spent well over a hundred years meditating, practicing yoga, and being intentional about our being.

    After an hour of yoga practice, we brewed peppermint tea grown in Kathy’s garden, sweetened with an old fashioned peppermint stick. We ate my nearly world-famous vegan bran muffins, and we were nourished by love and respect and commonality.

    We were infinitely grateful to honor Kathy, who honors us by bringing yoga to our life. Yoga is not just about what happens on the mat.

    We each drew a card from the Wisdom of The Crone deck. Kathy drew “Passages.”

    Nancy recently gifted me a copy of Frank J. Cunningham’s Vesper Time: The Spiritual Practice of Growing Older. This book may seem a bit too religious for some, too early for others, and irrelevant to many, but at any stage and especially at our age the wisdom and inspiration is worth integrating because, as Cunningham writes, “… we are in a phase of life that we will not look back on as we do on childhood, adolescence, and adulthood. We do not grow out of this phase.”

  • Light My Fire

    Sacred Stories

    After she and her husband retired, he built their dream home. One of his favorite things in the house was a gas fireplace.

    She was always cold in the mornings and he would get up and turn on the fireplace.

    She often chided him about doing that, saying it used too much propane, and it would be more cost effective to turn on the furnace.

    He would smile at her and say, “I like the a-m-b-i-a-n-c-e.”

    After he passed, twice that gas fireplace lit spontaneously….

    These are sacred stories. Pay attention to happenings in your life. Do you have a story to share? Send email to debra@scs-matters.com.

  • Rest Well

    HALT is a way to remind ourselves the importance of not letting ourselves get too hungry, angry, lonely, or tired. After a long day of unpacking, going to play dominoes with good friends was made much more fun when I got to hold a new kitten, Lucy. Lucy has an older sister kitty, and I talk to her in my best squeaky cat talk voice but KK is too shy with strangers to relax and snooze.

    Here is Lucy napping on my lap during the game.

    Lucy’s personality and her surrendered napping on my lap jogged my thinking about how different we all are. KK wants to be close but just can’t trust enough to let herself enjoy it.

    At a recent Grief Journey Group several people shared profound pain around loved ones wanting or needing to do their process differently. One person wants to pack up photos, give away clothes, and move on. Another chooses to have the loved-ones items stay in their places. With tears born of experience, the message of encouragement was, “Just because we do things differently does not mean we don’t love each another.”

    This awareness is not just important around loss or grief because recognizing and respecting differences is key in all relating.

    The past ten days has been very busy for me. A close friend moved into Glen-Aire, our 55+ Manufactured Home community, just down the street. She had MAJOR back surgery last year and is still healing from that. Since I am a bit excessive about organization, my skills were welcome.

    The move was more major than most because this couple just got married in April. A few weeks before the wedding both of their homes sold immediately with very quick closings, necessitating all the contents of both homes being packed up for going into storage. The unpacking, therefore, was unusual in that every box came from one or the other of the homes and the contents of each had to be negotiated compassionately. They moved out of large homes with basements and garages and a life time of belongings. They moved into 13, 000 square feet.

    Many times I said it clearly, “If it is meaningful, there is room for it.”

    I am humbled to say right now I probably know where more of their things are than either of them. But it won’t stay that way long.

    And Lucy won’t stay a tiny kitten long either. I trust my friends will love curling up in their new home, and I trust Lucy will continue to enjoy curling up with new friends.

    The nature of life is change. Some changes are welcome, some are forced; some are pleasant, some are painful. Sometimes we move into much larger or significantly smaller spaces, or even into a brand new community.

    Whatever changes are happening for you right now, I hope when you are tired you will let yourself curl up somewhere safe and take a nap. May all beings rest well…

  • Divine Timing for Auto Service

    Sacred Stories

    She called to get her car in for service. She was hoping for an appointment on Thursday of that week because she was going to be house-bound with some workers coming.

    The auto repair shop could not get her car in until the following week on Thursday.

    Soon after the workers arrived, she heard a frantic knock at her door. A friend’s husband had just been taken to the hospital. He had driven their car so the woman needed a ride to the hospital.

    Obviously there was divine timing for the service of her auto. She needed to have her car that day!

    These are sacred stories. Pay attention to happenings in your life. Do you have a story to share? Send email to debra@scs-matters.com.