Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: caterpillar

  • Already a Butterfly

    In The Wisdom of No Escape: And the Path of Loving-kindness, Pema Chödrön qutoes Joseph Campbell, writing, “It has been said, quite accurately that the psychotic drowns in the same waters in which the mystic swims with delight.” One might wonder what it is that the mystic sees/hears/knows/experiences which leads to the more pleasant conclusion.

    Last evening I was Zoom host for The Eden Project when Barbara Brodsky logged on saying Aaron was requesting the use of breakout rooms. I have hosted a lot of Zoom classes for/with Barbara and Aaron, but I have no experience setting up the breakout rooms. I reached out via text to my virtual buddy and I asked out loud of another friend whom Barbara said has a lot of experience with Zoom — neither of them had any experience with the breakout rooms.

    The intention to use the breakout rooms remained steady in our hearts and minds. I selected the “allow participants to choose” option. Not successful yet. One of the participants sent a link to a tutorial video, but knew I could not switch to that easily enough to learn while hosting the group. Another participant with some experience was willing to help, so I quickly made him co-host and together (with lots and lots of cooperation and co-creation) the breakout rooms were enjoyed!

    I was unable to join the small group because I was the Zoom host. I did not want to leave Barbara without support.  Awareness came instantly that spirit had given me the experience prior to the group meeting when I accidentally dropped my Osho Zen Tarot deck, and three cards spilled out.

    The first card is 20 Beyond Illusion:
    don’t look outside for what’s inside

    The second card is 5 of Clouds Comparison:
    all is needed and everything fits together

    The third card is Ace of Water Going with the Flow:
    everything is happening exactly as it should

    Just as the spilled card spread began with the butterfly, so did Aaron’s talk!

    When you are a caterpillar, you are already a butterfly and yet it has not manifested….

    You live in a world in which you have the power to change things!

    Where would you like to be in your awareness one month from now?

    How do we awaken the imaginal cells and begin to imagine a world/family/individual in which there is peace? What does it look like, feel like, taste like, smell like?

    You cannot think your way in, but you can sing your way, dance your way, or draw your way in.

    Begin with asking: “What conditions are necessary for a world of peace — a world without hatred?”

    I received a text message:

    M: Good afternoon, Miss Debra. If you are not too busy, could you pendle some thing for me? My question is ready.

    D: No….There is a bit of a jokester energy present. Does that make sense?

    M: A medication was prescribed for one of our guys. It’s pretty heavy duty. I am so not sure whether to start the script.

    D: Do you have it with you?

    M: I actually haven’t picked it up yet. Probably I’ll go in a little while. Muscle test?

    D: Yes! Muscle test. Do you have the script or can you imagine holding it up to your heart?

    M: Nothing tangible.

    D: Let’s do it with intention.

    M: When you asked me if I could imagine holding it up to my heart, I heard that it’s not for me. LOL.

    D: Direct your intention. And thank them for clarifying for us. LOL.

    M: Yes. LOL. I got “maybe.”

    D: Similar here. I actually asked if it would be beneficial, and I heard “maybe.” I asked if it could be harmful, and I heard “maybe.”

    M: Yes, that’s how it comes to me.

    D: What I am immediately aware of is that we are so oriented to the “right or wrong” instead of realizing that Spirit can work with anything and everything.

    M: Ahhhhh….

    D: You could not take it out of fear and you are adding fear to your little guy. You could take it out of fear and you are adding fear to your little guy. You could take it out of love and be adding love. You could not take it out of love and be adding love. Make sense?

    M: Yes, and then what is my next best step. Maybe sit with it some more.

    D: When you find your center of peace, you will act from that. Make that your best step. I am certainly navigating this as well — with all of the medication John is on.

    M: Yes, I can feel that. I certainly appreciate your sharing your journey.

    Opening the Daily Word this morning, essentially the same message comes through in Colossians 3:14: Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.

    This is called equanimity in Buddhism: Mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in a difficult situation. As in,”She accepted both the pleasant and the unpleasant with equanimity.”

    Perhaps our true mystic nature is awakening from it’s caterpillar stage. After all, you are already a butterfly….
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    P.S. Permission to share this from one of the Zoom attendees:

    I had an extraordinary experience in our little group. I turned three times and this painting just unfolded in 15 minutes!

    Thought of your writings today. Once I’d finished the painting, I looked outside and the trees and the leaves everywhere looked even more vibrant. Wow! It felt like, as we as humans become more awake, all of the flora, fauna, trees etc will flourish!!!

  • Specimen of Transformation

    I woke up this morning thinking about a beautiful woman, who happens to be the daughter of a dear friend of mine. A remarkable feat of love — her going this past weekend to visit her biological father on his deathbed to assure him of forgiveness for his abuse.

    That same woman is undergoing surgery today.

    This is how I came to ponder the life cycle of a butterfly.



    Amazing words leapt off the page as I read under the heading: Do butterflies remember being caterpillars?

    The study showed that memory, and therefore the nervous system, stays during the complex transformation from the caterpillar to the adult moth.

    So while a moth or butterfly may not remember being a caterpillar, it can remember experiences it learned as a caterpillar

    This woman’s life cycle as a daughter is no less remarkable. While her nervous system has stayed during the complex transformation — so she remembers the experiences she learned — she is definitely no longer the victim of abuse.

      “I wish it need not have happened in my time,” said Frodo.

      “So do I,” said Gandalf, “and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”

      ~ J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring

    Just like the butterfly, we can remember our experiences and benefit from the learning even as we are being transformed. My meditation teacher speaks a lot about our collective transformation (from negative polarity to positive polarity) and assures us we are moving to a stage of consciousness where we not only learn from our own experience, but we are truly transformed by the collective learning.

    Becoming a Teacher to Others

    When you begin to work with other people as a teacher, that is a very dangerous point. Unless you are willing to learn from students—unless you regard yourself as a student and the students as your teacher—you cease to be a true teacher. You only impart your experience of what you’ve been taught, a package deal. And having done that, there’s no more to say—unless you repeat yourself again and again.

    Excerpted from: “The Bardo of Meditation” in Transcending Madness: The Experience of the Six Bardos, by Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche (page 63)

    Last evening, her mother and I were talking about how hard it is for all those facing surgeries during the pandemic. I had been to my primary care physician for the first time since the pandemic earlier in the day. EVERYTHING is so much harder.

    People are dropped off at the door.

    Family has to wait elsewhere.

    When notified, they pick up the patient.

    I was remembering ALL of the support I received when I had the abdominal mass removed in November, 2012. A friend came with John and me. She stayed with him until the mother of this remarkable woman arrived to relieve them. I had a revolving door of caregivers.

    It was not just easier on me. Every act of support and care provided to me by this “care team” was support for those employed to care for me.

    My heart was filled to overflowing as I watched the extra effort everyone at the doctor’s office had to take to make sure we are all safe. My doctor’s husband is an ER doc. She expressed her hope that humanity will pull together so we will all be able to enjoy communal life again. She said, “I am so looking forward to being able to hug you when I walk you out.”

    This admitted “white-coat syndrome” sufferer had a blood pressure reading of 122/70 in that atmosphere of love. That, too, is no easy feat.

    Today, I bow to each beautiful specimen of transformation.