Debra Basham

Living and Loving

Tag: birthday

  • Happy 2026 Birthday to Me (and 15 others I know!)

    Today is my birthday. If you are willing, you may wish to reflect on my birthday post from 2018 about “Corpse Prayer” at https://edq.ojt.mybluehost.me/debrabashamcom/corpse-prayer/ My birthday posts are not always maudlin, but today I post with a warning: Not For the Faint of Heart.

    After having become vigilant about weight back in the Twiggy super thin model days, I maintained 137 pounds for decades. Then after getting up to 147 the winter of 2023 I was able to be stable at 130. This past summer my weight started going down. I had my doctor do some tests along with my annual exam, but nothing showed up and I left for Florida at 125. Still wondering what my birthday ritual would be, yesterday morning early when I weighed myself I tipped the scales below 120, and anxiety set in.

    I used a drawing/coloring/writing tool a colleague taught me a few years back and wrote:

      Weight/Wait

      All these years, wanting to be thin. Now nervous as the scales show just below 120 pounds. Is something wrong? Am I sick? Will I die?
      Of course, we all do. But what am I waiting for? Is it possible to go before your time? Can the mystery be seen by the heart?

    The story began long, long ago in 1992 shortly after my dad died. I have a published version of it called Where Moon Go? available for 99 cents, but the gist is that I asked God if my dad was okay where he was. I meant was he in heaven or hell, but I said, “I don’t want you to tell me what you think I want to know, I want to know what’s real.”

    Things started happening. As I was driving, the moon would be hidden behind a cloud or a building and I would hear, “It looks like I’m gone, but I am still here.” When I realized this was the answer to my question about my dad, my world view shifted! You don’t have to agree with my experience — always ask your own questions to get to what is real. And that is part of this year’s birthday ritual which began with a text chain that led to my reading Jeremiah 33:3 with my sister and daughter and niece (published in Sacred Stories ).

    I did an AI search asking the question, “Do the worlds’ religions think time of death is preordained?” Some interesting stuff there!

    As I read through answers from Christianity, Judaism, Hinduism, and Buddhism, I begin to pray, “I want to know what’s real about human death, and I don’t want you to tell me what you think I want to know. I want to know what’s real.”

    One of my persistent thoughts about a rise in human consciousness and a shift from 3rd density to 5th density is, “What could/would/will human life be like on earth with no fear of death?”

    The one-year anniversary of the death of our older sister, Johnnie Sue, is coming up on January 31. That was some of the text chain that led to all of this. She died with no fear of death. So did my friend, Linda Higbee. Both of them lived with a lot of need to control and anxiety, but both of them passed with peace, praise God!

    For those who did not go back and read the 2018 birthday blog, here is the “Corpse Prayer” again.

    Corpse Prayer

    Be not afraid.
    I give thanks to god who created all things good.
    In christ, all things hold together.
    I am not entitled to life without death.
    I embrace sacred life.
    I embrace sacred death.
    I embrace the growing and crumbling in between.
    Smile at yourself in the silence…
    ~ Jarem Sawatsky

    I wrote into my journal, “I want to know what’s real about human life on earth without fear of death….”

    That afternoon, through myriad emotions, I shared all of this with my sister, Janis, telling her I realize the way to know is to LIVE life without fear of death.

  • Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu

    Today is my birthday.

    As my birthday ritual I did an audio Mudita meditation with John Orr from an online retreat day April 11, 2021. Mudita is a Sanskrit and Pali word that means “sympathetic joy” or “appreciative pleasure”. It’s a Buddhist concept that involves feeling joy for the good fortune of others.

    The first person you choose is someone you can feel a genuine sense of happiness for their good fortune and happiness. Today I chose my older grandson, Bradley. Currently I am sharing substantial time with him as he his helping me get DebraBasham.com set up. It will be the new home to Yellow Brick Road and Sacred Stories and many of the resources that have been located on SCS-Matters.com.

    The second person is often called The Benefactor — someone who has been loving and supportive for you at some time or times in your life. I chose Reverend Betty Lue Lieber, who founded Reunion with her husband, Robert Waldon. This is the the program I was ordained through in 1997.

    The third person is a neutral person. It may not even be someone you know personally, but it is someone who is feeling happiness and good fortune with a recent accomplishment, something that likely brings that person joy. I chose Donald Trump. You are instructed in the meditation to notice any old mind states like jealousy or envy. Right there with those feelings say, “May joy infuse your life. May it continue all of your days. May you truly be happy. May you truly be free. May all of this grow. May it infuse your heart.”

    The fourth person is sometimes called The Enemy but it is just a challenging person (a person you are having a challenge with). You are encouraged to notice all of the happiness in that person’s life — loving family and friends and relationships, meaningful work. “May you be truly happy and well.” You are invited to be genuinely grateful for all that you have learned from this person.

    After the guided meditation ended I played a recording of the chant “Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu” from a residential retreat day October 10, 2019. Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu is a Sanskrit phrase that translates to “May all beings everywhere be happy and free”. It is a prayer for global well-being and peace, and a perfect chant to support the Mudita Meditation.

    When I finished I looked at a list of others I know share a January 22 birthday:
    1. Wayne Kaiser
    2. Emily Warner
    3. Phillip Largay
    4. Joyce Zerbe
    5. Aaron (Linda Gunter’s son)
    6. Allen Mumper
    7. Emily’s husband’s cousin
    8. PT at Borgess
    9. George Ross
    10. Izzie (granddaughter Courtney’s friend)
    11. Carrie Startcher (daughter Stacey’s friend in Clarksville)
    12. Sivia’s mother

    I like to also contemplate the day’s messages that come on this day from sources I value and follow.

    Daily Reflection from Deep Spring

    In a moment of darkness, you are wont to ask, “Why this darkness?” You have a sense that if you could but understand the darkness, you could protect yourself from it. Such thinking only further strengthens the illusion of the self. Can you sit there in that darkness and simply know, “Here I sit in darkness and I will wait. I need not fight with the darkness. I need not try to push it away. I need not grasp, even at faith.”

    Just faith: faith expressed as the willingness to sit in darkness, if darkness is what is there, without a need to grasp at the light but with the willingness to open the doors and allow in the light. ~ Aaron

    On this day of your life Debra, I believe God wants you to know that not everything has to turn out exactly the way you planned in order for you to call it a success. Sometimes all God wants you to do is to “get the ball rolling.” Then, She’ll take it from there.

    So when things turn out other than the way you wanted them to, don’t be so quick to say, “Bummer!”

    Many a Bummer is a Blessing in disguise. Consider the possibility that life is magic…and that there’s a rabbit in that hat.

    Love, your Friend, Neale Donald Walsch

    From Gratefulness.org

    You must live life with the full knowledge that your actions will remain. We are creatures of consequence. ~ Zadie Smith

    From The Daily Tejaniya

    When you are truly aware you aren’t focusing, yet you are
    aware of objects. You are aware of thoughts of the mind, sensations
    of the body, and perceptions (sights,sounds, etc.) of the world.

    By practicing in this way, the mind stays fresh.

    It may not be usual to be happier for someone else’s birth than your own on your birthday, but today I truly feel greater joy that Stacey was born than that I was born. I get that she could not have been born unless I had been, but emotions don’t always make sense. In fact, they are often very distorted. That is just how it is. So at three quarters of a century I am grateful for the wonderful woman who came in as a teenage pregnancy and those that came in from her.

    RIP Wayne Kaiser and Allen Mumper.

    May all beings everywhere be happy and free. Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu….

  • Birthday Beach Frog

    She was walking the beach early in the morning on her birthday June 6, 2024…. conversing with her husband in spirit as she always does…. especially on beach walks. It is always so peaceful for her, and one of their favorite activities together collecting beach glass and rocks.

    Lo and behold! A frog jumped out of Lake Michigan, hopped up the beach, passed where she had stopped suddenly, turned and hopped back into the lake.

    She dropped to her knees. Stunned, although at this point why should she be?

    See Tree Frogs! posted December 1, 2018.

    She is so grateful she has opened her heart and been guided forward on this journey of life without her husband in his physical body next to hers.

    She says, “He is with me always.”

  • Two Dimes!!!

    Sacred Stories

    It was a significant birthday. She was 70!

    Two of her best friends were out of town.

    At the end of the day, as she went from the living room through the kitchen to her bedroom, she saw a dime on the floor! A dime always made her think of her dad. People often think of dimes or pennies as being messages from heaven.

    One more step, and there was a second dime!

    Aw… both her dad and her mom were there wishing her a happy birthday!

  • Gunner

    Sacred Stories

    It was his birthday.

    He had wanted to get a dog for so long but the landlord would not allow dogs where he lived.

    So his mom went online and ordered him a little Ty puppy dog for his birthday.


    When she received it, she opened the tag to see the name (each Ty animal is named).

    The name of this dog was “Lil’ Gunner.”


    Such an unusual name and then for a toy to be named that.

    His name is Gunner!!!!

    Gunner’s aunt instantly recognized the gift had come from her brother — Gunner’s grandpa — who is in spirit….

    “Oh, well…. I don’t need to go further,” she said. “I just love when Spirit gives such clear and marvelous gifts.”

  • Fifty-Fourth Birthday

    Sacred Stories

    She was working on a very deep poem — inspired by her goddaughter’s birthday — with her four poet colleagues/friends on Zoom. She did not share the poem simply because hers was a personal piece not requiring critique, and others had pieces that did. She agreed to send it after the meeting, just for sharing.

    That evening, after substantial insight, she also sent an edited version to the group with a bit of background, adding, “Oddly, the original version had 282 words, the final 228!”

    “How old is your goddaughter?” asked one.

    “Fifty-four.”

    “The difference between 282 and 228 is 54,” her friend wrote back.

    “What made you ask how old she is?”

    “I figured since you had included the number of words in both versions, it must be significant.”

    She quickly looked up the numerology meaning. (54 reduces to 9.)

    Number 9 is the number of Universal love, eternity, faith, Universal Spiritual Laws, the concept of karma, spiritual enlightenment, spiritual awakening, service to humanity, humanitarianism and the humanitarian, lightworking and lightworkers, leading by positive example, philanthropy and the philanthropist, charity.

    Very significant, indeed!

  • Who Are You Dancing With?


    Trust me,
    she knew who she was dancing with
    the entire time.
    She just chose to see the good in everybody.
    I personally do not think she should change
    that about herself.
    It is possible her energy could even bring out
    the best in the devil.
    ~ author unknown

    Each year I look forward to a spiritual ritual for the celebrating of my birthday. It is not for sissies, this incarnational experience.

    It can even be said we are a God Spark. Our true nature is the theme of a recent post, so just trust me about this: We come from God.

    Something is happening that calls for our most profound awareness and commitment: Those most dedicated to love and light are making themselves ill over the conditions in our world.

    In My Pores

    Gratitude seeps in my pores.
    I am thankful for the wooden plaque John made for me for Christmas: Not to spoil the ending, but everything is going to be OK.
    The truth hangs on the wall of our utility room. The most mundane of situations needs the most light to be seen clearly.
    All conditions are impermanent.
    As my fingers dance over the keys on the keyboard Alexa is playing John Denver songs for my listening pleasure: “Sunshine almost always makes me high….” the harmonica calls my soul upward toward the sun.
    Loving individuals unknowingly allow their egos to take over their hearts, losing joy and making themselves sick over the conditions in the world today.
    Perhaps my birthday wish is all humans can rewrite the ending of the Myth of Icarus.
    Son of the creator of the Labyrinth, Icarus was instructed to fly neither too low nor too high. Too close, the sun’s heat would melt his wings of feathers and wax. Too low, the sea’s dampness would clog his wings. Not heeding the warning to avoid the extremes, the former Icarus fell from the sky and drowned in the sea.
    It is said about grief that if one you love dies and you refuse to live, then two have died.
    We must not ignore or deny the conditions we see in the world. We must also not collapse into helplessness or hopelessness.
    Love is our true nature.
    “Love is the light that shines from heart to heart…” John Denver sings on. Is John Denver dead? His music isn’t.
    Are you alive? Does your music live?
    Seventy candles on my cake.
    I think I will make my cake a lemon pie, the juice squeezed from a lemon picked (better to ask forgiveness than permission) from a tree where succulent fruit is left to fall to the ground and rot.
    Let not the light of our eternal love lay wasted by lamenting conditions which are impermanent.

    Gratitude is in our pores.

    All conditions are impermanent…

    Sheilana Massey invited those gathered for meditation for world peace to consider that every expression of the Divine has a right to be. The darkness and the light. The pleasant and the unpleasant. The old and the young.

    As Betty Lue Leiber’s Loving Reminder for January 15, 2020 said, the only mistake we ever make is when we forget to Love.

    I look at the crepey skin on my arms, and the brown spots on my hands. I ponder what the next decade will bring in our world. I choose to let my light shine.

  • Happy Birthday Coffee

    She was on a group text. It was her birthday. A friend who was also on the group text sent a message to the group telling them about the birthday.

    Another member of the list wrote, “I remember having seen you at Tosi’s Cafe a few years ago on your birthday. You had a little package, and you were enjoying a favorite coffee. You said you were celebrating your birthday.”

    “I am sitting at Tosi’s Cafe right now!” came the immediate reply.

    When we witness the timing of events in our lives we see how the sacred stories weave together with the mundane. NOTHING is outside the grace of life.

    Please notice. Then share!

  • Happy Birthday in Heaven

    She received a text message from her friend who was sharing a Facebook prompt that their mutual friend was having a birthday today. Their friend had passed several years ago.

    She wrote back, “I had not realized her birthday was the same day as my daughter but that must be why she came to my mind during my meditation this morning.”

    Wishing her a happy birthday in heaven!

    When we honor these lovely ways our beloveds remain with us, we remember we always have more support than might be recognized. Thank you for sharing!

  • Draw a Card

    Today is my birthday. I LOVE birthday ritual. This morning I wrote in my journal: Today is my birthday. And Wayne’s. It seems significant Claudia is feeling sad. She said Wayne always said, “It is what it is.”

    What ritual is honest for me today?

    I hear: “Draw a card.”

    I draw a card. Angelic Messenger Card #12 Forgiveness.

    Accepting responsibility for your life; releasing blame and the judgment of others. Immense beauty and opportunity live beneath your old emotional scars.

    This time in your life represents the final pass-through for many of these persisting lessons.

    You can truly know and appreciate only your own life’s journey and perspective.

    Pay attention to the thoughts you have as you fall asleep ad those that are on your mind as you wake up. These thoughts embody the situations and the people needing your forgiveness.

    “I forgive you, and I forgive me for being caught in the process of change and for our being unable to see each other clearly.”

    Angelic Messenger Cards: Divine Guidance for Personal Healing and Spiritual Discovery by Meredith L. Young-Sowers.

    “It is what it is.”

    I draw a card. #54 Epona’s Wild Daughter, from The Fairies’ Oracle (by Brian Froud and Jessica Macbeth), in the reversed position.

    “The wise person prays for guidance and actively seeks it. The answers we truly need are to be found deeply within ourselves. What do our nightmares tell us?”

    The phone ringing woke me up this morning. I was dreaming I was at a training but had left the classroom and gotten distracted futzing in the kitchen. A little boy was now with me as I was hustling to get back to the classroom. Suddenly I realized the class had already ended. I had been thinking it did not end until 3:00, but it had ended at 2:00.

    I draw one more card. Page of Water: Understanding from the Osho Zen Tarot: The Transcendental Game Of Zen.

    “Move with the sweetness and gentleness of the present moment. Feel the fluttering within. Spread your wings and be free.”

    I wrote in my journal how much I love these messages from the cards. They all point to the truth that freedom is here now.

    The voice responded:

    Of course, freedom is here now. If something had blocked your freedom, that IS no longer. Each moment is new. Each breath is NOW.

    In your dream you thought the class went until 3 o’clock, but when you realized the class was over you were afraid you had been negligent, that you had missed something.

    You had missed the awareness of completion!

    The class had ended and you were still frantically trying to get there.

    Give yourself the greatest birthday present ever—the PRESENT.

    Allow yourself to bask in the luxury of this moment. No regrets. No planning mind.

    Tell all who know. They all know.

    Wow… that is the best PRESENT ever!